How do I know if i've done the right thing?

Slattsy

Well,
Broke up the the girlfriend recently, been going out over 2 years and things were pretty serious.. ie living together, joint savings account with a view to buying a house next year & all the things that come with this...

However things have gone off the boil recently, nothing she has done, just one of those things that happens i guess. I feel my heart just isnt in it anymore and i've bit the bullet so to speak. I cant reiterate enough how it was not her fault, she's an amazing person and i was so happy to have her in my life until recently.

Im feeling pretty damn down over the whole thing to be honest

But, how will I know if i've done the right thing, or should i have tried to ride the storm out and gave it more time to see if I changed.

My name is URL

meh.. you'd probably be asking the same questions if you hadn't broken up with her. If you think you made a mistake though then do something about it

Having a joint savings account after 2 years sounds a tad mental.. but that's just my opinion.

easyeason3

Give it time & you will know.

Are you still on friendly terms with her or does she want to hack your balls off?

MagicMarker

OP, you've come to the right place.

J.Ball

Maybe you should have figured out what caused things to go off the boil and tryed to change things. Maybe you were just bored with another aspect of life and it focused on her.

Then again relationships go stale too so dont beat yourself up about it. Get a hamster instead.

icywind1980

I didn't read the OP's question, but if you're asking in AH then you probably didn't do the right thing.

St.Spodo

Ring her at three in the morning shouting abuse at her, then ring an hour later crying and begging for forgiveness. Be hilarious.

Swampy

You did the wrong thing. It's too late now. You will regret it for the rest of your life. Game over.

ArtyM

Posting this on AH may not be the best advised - you might get some advice but I think you may have to sort through quite a few 'alternative' replies.
Am tempted to give you my advice but given that my relationship cv would resemble a work by Stephen King, I will refrain.
Good luck though.

Slattsy

Ah i can take a bitta fun, water off a ducks back and all that.
It was a serious post so serious comments would be good to get..

But if not, then im sure i can laugh at the abuse !!

landsleaving

St.Spodo wrote: »

Ring her at three in the morning shouting abuse at her, then ring an hour later crying and begging for forgiveness. Be hilarious.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cd8k39rylUE

galwayrush

Well, looks like you did the right thing and didn't buy that home together.;)

El Weirdo

Slattsy wrote: »

...nothing she has done...

Did you ride her ma?

biscuiteater

Slattsy wrote: »

it was not her fault

ok did you use the immortal 'it's not you it's me' ha ha ha ha ha ha

sorry, it's not can you live with a person for the rest of your life but can you live without them, every day the husband drives me mad, but know life without him would be empty, the madly deeply in love is long gone, but no other man could ever replace the little bollox, that's how you know

Slattsy

galwayrush wrote: »

Well, looks like you did the right thing and didn't buy that home together.;)

Well thats why i did it now !!

And who put Busted up on this.... shame on you sir !!

Larianne

How old are you?

Always go with your gut instinct. It's really horrible breaking up with someone you've fallen out of love with but best for both of ye in the end.

landsleaving

Slattsy wrote: »

Well thats why i did it now !!

And who put Busted up on this.... shame on you sir !!

Any more lip from you and I'll post up 'Air Hostess'

Cat Melodeon

If you broke up because you realised you don't love her, good for you.
Likewise if you're a bit young and feel the need to spread it about a bit for a while longer.
If it's for no other reason other than things went off the boil a bit and you didn't bother working at that, then you're an idiot. Intimacy, kinky sex, proper conversation etc all go a long way to keeping things simmering. No long-term relationship lasts at boiling point for ever - all that steam eventually burns the arse out of your teapot (or some such suitable end to the overdone metaphor).

Slattsy

Cat Melodeon wrote: »

If you broke up because you realised you don't love her, good for you.
Likewise if you're a bit young and feel the need to spread it about a bit for a while longer.
If it's for no other reason other than things went off the boil a bit and you didn't bother working at that, then you're an idiot. Intimacy, kinky sex, proper conversation etc all go a long way to keeping things simmering. No long-term relationship lasts at boiling point for ever - all that steam eventually burns the arse out of your teapot (or some such suitable end to the overdone metaphor).

Point taken, although i could do without the idiot bit all the same..
Sex life was fine, everything was fine really, its just me. Its not about about spreading it about either.
Maybe i have fallen out of love, maybe the break will tell me alot.

Time will tell if i made a big mistake or a wise decision.

Saila

try blasting her with piss, always re-ignites a dying relationship

7sr2z3fely84g5

Slattsy wrote: »

Point taken, although i could do without the idiot bit all the same..
Sex life was fine, everything was fine really, its just me. Its not about about spreading it about either.
Maybe i have fallen out of love, maybe the break will tell me alot.

Time will tell if i made a big mistake or a wise decision.

Listen to your gut instinct,maybe your a young enough man who wanted to get out of it for a while and enjoy single hood,if you can,stay good friends so if you do fall back in love.

alexa5x5

Well speaking as a woman, I wouldn’t want to be with a guy that didn’t 100% want to be with me. Even if I was head over heels in love with him, if he didn’t feel the same way I’d rather we broke up. I very much believe in gut instincts, if it didn’t feel right OP then I think you did the right thing. I’m sure you feel crap at the moment but give it time, you never know you might realise you want her back until that doubt is gone from you mind you need the space to be sure.

Slattsy

alexa5x5 wrote: »

Well speaking as a woman, I wouldn’t want to be with a guy that didn’t 100% want to be with me. Even if I was head over heels in love with him, if he didn’t feel the same way I’d rather we broke up. I very much believe in gut instincts, if it didn’t feel right OP then I think you did the right thing. I’m sure you feel crap at the moment but give it time, you never know you might realise you want her back until that doubt is gone from you mind you need the space to be sure.

Spot on with this, thanks.

Sounds silly but all my mates (both male and fem) are 50/50 on the subject, some think im an awful eejit while the rest agree along the lines with what you just said.

I wont know until some time has passed and the dust has settled.

Thanks for you thoughts on it

alexa5x5

Slattsy wrote: »

Spot on with this, thanks.

Sounds silly but all my mates (both male and fem) are 50/50 on the subject, some think im an awful eejit while the rest agree along the lines with what you just said.

I wont know until some time has passed and the dust has settled.

Thanks for you thoughts on it

No problem, take care

Laika1986

I think you know you have done the right thing but its human nature to want assurance that you have

ddef

she's not putting out anymore, is she?

Slattsy

ddef wrote: »

she's not putting out anymore, is she?

The words 'nail' & 'head' spring to mind :rolleyes:

St.Spodo

Take her back and book her into a fellatio class. That should solve your problem.

Feeona

biscuiteater wrote: »

It's not can you live with a person for the rest of your life but can you live without them,
Every day the husband drives me mad,
But know life without him would be empty, the madly deeply in love is long gone,
But no other man could ever replace the little bollox,
That's how you know

I want to see this in a Hallmark card, with fancy swirly writing, and flowers It's one in the eye for romantic ****e!