A little advice please.

LegacyUser

Ok this is my second time posting here, long time boards member but I'll go unregged for this. I have some questions which Im hoping you could help me out with and just give me some advice.

First of all If I was clubbing/out and saw a girl i found attractive i'd never do anything about it, be it confidence or just thinking she's probably not my type. Usually with a girl, I always kind of just end up in a situation where I know the girl before the night out or go with her ( not as a date though ) and from there we chat and just get on great. Both smiling/laughing making eye contact and then on the walk home its kind of arm around waste and all that.

But I never like to try anything cause I'm afraid i'll mess it up, its kind of like in one night we go from just being "hey how are you" friends to something where we are totally comfortable with each other and just really connect. I'm certain im not a bad kisser or anything but I can just never read the signs, until it's probably too late( I then think about it after ).

So my questions, Now that I've done this again, If the girl was into me would she then go off me cause It seemed like I wasn't interested ( cause I did nothing ), like we still keep in contact after but its hard to tell someones feelings through text/facebook.

Also, why do I always seem to miss the signs, At the time I might notice them but think nothing of them, and then it's too late. What should I look out for in a girl that's interested in me?

And on the off-chance I do this again with the same or another girl, should I then ask her out to something like a pub( obviously not a romantic candle lit dinner ) something kind of relaxed but friends could do just incase?

Thank you!

Peanut2011

you know what they say "no guts no glory".

I know it's easier said than done but if you never try anything they might think you are just interested to be a friend.

I find if you are open and say that you would like to take them on a date after the initial meet and be yourself it will either work or it won't. Either way you have nothing to lose.

IrishEyes19

I say drop the "is she into me" thing and go for it, OP. Life is too short to be wondering that. Just take a shot with someone and if you get rejected, dont take it personally. Girls are just as nervous as guys are. So its always going be hard to know.

7Sins

DublinLadWithAQuestion wrote: »

And on the off-chance I do this again with the same or another girl, should I then ask her out to something like a pub( obviously not a romantic candle lit dinner ) something kind of relaxed but friends could do just incase?

Thank you!

I'm only going to comment on this bit. Is there something wrong with a romantic candle lit dinner nowadays? I've made that mistake in the past, were when arranging a date, we agree to meet on a "friends" basis and go for a casual drink...it's fine too but there's nothing wrong with taking a girl you like out for a romantic meal. I think it shows that you're interested and willing to make an effort for her. If you ask her out as a friend she could just end up being only that. Be a bit more assertive in your intentions and don't be afraid of romance

LegacyUser

Thanks all for the help, I know the "you've got nothing to lose" but I always feel I have, I've been with other girls but haven't connected with them in this way. And after a while I'll kind of drift away from them cause we have clashing personalities or something, but that doesn't bother me.

With this, it's like the basis of a great friendship that could make for a great relationship but I don't want to risk it for fear or losing a new friend( If it comes down to a no, the "we can be friends" thing just never is that! ), but without trying I'll never know if she felt the same way about me and what could happen next. So I'm gonna( at some point ) act on this!

7Sins I wouldn't do the meal as a first on the off chance I could be wrong and it would make for a very awkward time, I'd prefer to be sure before that but It would be an option.