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Confused

  • 18-04-2011 10:25am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi All,

    I hope you can help me with this one. I am very confused at the moment. Firstly I have never been in a serious relationship; I am a female in my late 20's. At the moment things are very full on with work and college. I am under alot of pressure and all my time is taken up with these things. My mother is an alcoholic and I have had major anger/issues with her in the past. Thing is I have been to counselling and I feel I have dealt with all of these issues. I have accepted me and my mother will never be best friends but our relationship is fine now. Recently I have met a great guy, he is perfect in everyway. However I am confused as to if I really like him or am just with him because I never had a proper relationship. At the moment I am fitting him with my schedule which he says he is fine with. To be honest most of the time I am with him I am so tired I just don’t want him there or wish I could put him off. So I am thinking I don’t like him but then I start to really miss him. I am aware I have alot of intimacy issues as a result of my relationship with my mother. My councillor did mention that children of alcoholic parents do develop intimacy problems in relationships. I feel I am being so unfair to him when all he is patient and kind. I feel like a total bit*ch. So what I am trying to figure out is 1. Do I really genuinely like him 2. Are issues coming up as my councillor did tell me about. 3. Am I so tired and stressed I am just trying to fit it all in and it’s too much.

    Again I am aware I am new to all this relationship stuff but the fact I still want to see him and do miss him must mean I do like him and he is worth it. Argh I am so confused and tired. Thing is when I am with him I feel like I treat him really badly and I am not good enough for him. But I don’t want to be like this. Any advice or insights are most welcome.

    Also i know I should talk to him but I don’t want him to see this mad, lunatic side of me.


Comments

  • #2
    champie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 36 ✭champie


    Give yourself some time and you will learn to trust, talk to you other half give him a chance, let him in you might be suprised.

    College exams should be over soon then you will have less on your plate to deal with and will be able to catch up with yourself:cool:

    It sounds to me that you do like him and yes maybe these are issues that your counseller said might come up or maybe they are just the jitters that everyone gets when a relationship starts getting serious/ long term he might be going through the same talk to him


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