I want to scream!!!

greenprincess

Ok I know this will sound really petty but it has quite hurt me! I broke up with my bf about a month ago, it was a mutual decision, but he claims he's still mad about me. We were together a good few years, and we are still friends.
A mutual friend added me on facebook, I accepted, went onto his page and the first photo is of him, another guy and then my ex kissing a girl's cheek, i kno that sounds tame but their all over each other in the pic. I'm just gutted, the pic was taken 3 days after we broke up. I also know I have no right to be annoyed etc but it has kinda hit me hard.

Stupid Facebook!!

CDfm

OP - you are broken up and it is mutual and he likes you -so that reads like you instigated the split.

It seems to me that you are miffed that he got some action quickly.

If it is mutual there is no waiting period. If you drove it forward than he has just accepted your point of view and moved on.

fghijkl

Hate to say it but it sounds like you don't want him, but you don't anyone else to have him either.

I wonder if you had found someone else first would you have even cared about these photos, i doubt it.

You say he's still mad about you but if he was really still mad about you in a romantic way you'd still be together and it wouldn't have been a mutual decision to break up. You've broken up, it's time to move on. You have to accept that he's allowed to move on too.

Maybe give yourself a break from facebook, and cool off the friendship between you for a while to give yourself some breathing space and allow yourself to move on/get over him/find someone else

greenprincess

CDfm wrote: »

OP - you are broken up and it is mutual and he likes you -so that reads like you instigated the split.

I can see why you'd think that, but no we only broke up because of a huge distance that has been forced between, it was mainly his decision but isnt anything neither of us can really do anything about.

I know ye are all right that I have no right to be angry, and I'm not angry it just upset me. Because the night that pic was taken he was texting me saying how much he misses me etc. I guess just the way he was going on I thought we would get back together when it was more fiasable. He keeps saying that he doesnt want to see anyone else at all, and how he still sees us getting married.

Like I know we are broken up and he will be with other girls but I just didnt expect to have to look at it, so soon anyway.

sam34

emm he was in a photo with two other lads and was kissing a girls cheek and "all over her"?

maybe he was just posing dramatically / theatrically for facebook photos in the way many people do?

I wouldn't assume , based on that pic, that he was actually with her.

CDfm

greenprincess wrote: »

I can see why you'd think that, but no we only broke up because of a huge distance that has been forced between, it was mainly his decision but isnt anything neither of us can really do anything about.

What - a geographical split -was it work related ?

So was there an opportunity or a commitment that your passion for one another could not overcome.

I know ye are all right that I have no right to be angry, and I'm not angry it just upset me. Because the night that pic was taken he was texting me saying how much he misses me etc. I guess just the way he was going on I thought we would get back together when it was more fiasable. He keeps saying that he doesnt want to see anyone else at all, and how he still sees us getting married.

Maybe he does miss you.

Like I know we are broken up and he will be with other girls but I just didnt expect to have to look at it, so soon anyway.

Social networks do that.

There is nothing wrong with telling him as there is nothing wrong with feelings.

greenprincess

It is a really big distance. I've actually had a look thro the boards, there seem to be a few ppl in similar situations, ie, moved abroad for work and one partner wants to go home. Well thats my situation to. We prob wont see each other for a year or two for a LDR wouldnt work.

I know it seems so petty to be upset by a pic. I guess I'm just really hurting right now and it hit me hard. I am trying to be so rational and logical about this but every so often my feeling but in

Asphyxia

Maybe you should 'hide' him on Facebook for a while until your heads clearer that way you wont see him much. It's going to be hard at the start but you should try get your mind off him by going on holiday or going out with your girlfriends.

IrishEyes19

greenprincess wrote: »

I can see why you'd think that, but no we only broke up because of a huge distance that has been forced between, it was mainly his decision but isnt anything neither of us can really do anything about.

I know ye are all right that I have no right to be angry, and I'm not angry it just upset me. Because the night that pic was taken he was texting me saying how much he misses me etc. I guess just the way he was going on I thought we would get back together when it was more fiasable. He keeps saying that he doesnt want to see anyone else at all, and how he still sees us getting married.

Like I know we are broken up and he will be with other girls but I just didnt expect to have to look at it, so soon anyway.

Totally natural, OP, to feel some pangs when you see any ex with someone else. You shared intimate moments with someone, so its natural to feel something when you see that. But you have to move on I guess, cant keep going back and forward hurting yourself by holding onto memories so to speak. Maybe blocking him on facebook would help. I dont mean deleting him, but just hiding his status's and photos until you are able to handle it. best of luck

greenprincess

I hit rock bottom yesterday least I only have one direction, up, to go now!!

Thanks guys, I am pretty alone where I am at the min but it wont be for long. I don't know if I will every be 100% over him but I at least I think I can work on myself for the min.

IrishEyes19

greenprincess wrote: »

I hit rock bottom yesterday least I only have one direction, up, to go now!!

Thanks guys, I am pretty alone where I am at the min but it wont be for long. I don't know if I will every be 100% over him but I at least I think I can work on myself for the min.

Of course you can, and if I were you, Id avoid facebook for a while or at least hide his status's and so on. Facebook isnt always good, just when you think you're fine, a photo creeps up or comments appear on pages and it brings back unwelcome memories or else you see them with someone else. So dont do that to yourself. You have the power here to make yourself better now, and get back on track. Wishing you all the best.