bullied at work

scientist

I gave up my job 6 months ago because of bullying.It went on for 3 years solid by a no. of people. When i left i told no one the real reason. I just said that my back was injured. There's a girl working there and she's a psycho. When i was alone with her she put me down all the time, bossed me around and generally treated me like ****.When others were present she underwent a massive change where we were now the best of friends. I hated her. She totally f**ked with my head. Then there was this other clique of girls that she just loved. She did all she could to break into their circle (they were all bullies aswell). There was a bully culture going on. Even the facilitators didnt get involved. They would even promote the one who was the biggest b**ch. I loved the job itself but by the time i left i was on the verge of a nervous breakdown from the pressure of going in there every day. I made some friends in there - very few and mostly people who were also being bullied. I have 2 kids and a husband with a disability so id no choice. But i left anyway it was so horrible. I Hate the idea of going into the workplace again and possibly have the same thing happen again. My confidence is destroyed. Has anyone had a similar experience and does anyone know if all labs are like that?

edellc

I had a very similiar experience to you although not in the lab sector
i worked for a company a number of years ago got on very well moved on to further my career and then a couple of years ago the owener/manager head hunted me
I returned as I had a pleasant experience the first time round the second time not so much I had a very negative experience with a male sales rep screaming in my face which i reported...I was told to seriously consider my position within the company and that I was a liar :eek: once this happened it was open season and i was fair game and oh they had a field day and there was nothing i could do as i was always the liar
ended up having a bit of a nervous breakdown and ended up off sick due to stress a hr company got involved and turned out the owner/manager lied about the details of all the incidents to cover his own ass

really felt that i could not go back there or any work place for fear of it happening again thankfully i had a silver lining i got pregnant i am now unemployed stay at home mammy and love it i know one day i will have to go back to work but i know it will be on my terms

it has taken just over two years to get to the point i am at now unfortunately i cannot offer any advise regarding how you go about facing returning to work but i do know what you went though and understand the stress that was caused I wish you the very best in overcoming this traumatic event and hopefully you are a stronger person for it

coffeeandshoes

Hey there scientist,

Don’t worry I went through a similar experience when I first moved to Dublin last year to buy a house with my Irish partner. I was really excited to start work because I had just moved and didn’t have any friends in Dublin yet, except my partner of course. So I really wanted a girlfriend to go shopping and for cocktails with! When I started with said firm I made friends with another really nice girl in the office my age (she was 24) and was really saddened when one day she disappeared off the roster?! She was apparently phone called by my then manager and let go due to “lack of hours” but I was later told by a colleague who was leaving that she was let go because the manager “didn’t like her”. She didn’t really drink allot and everyone else usually went out for a cigarette together so I guess she didn’t fit in. I noticed allot of cliquey behaviour going on with the girl’s, some would go for drinks together after work and never invite me unless it was a big event. At the xmas party I was mett with lots of fake patronising “Hiiiiii”’s and hug’s but I really felt quite uncomfortable. I left last year as my partner was luckily making enough income to support us both and have been a homemaker ever since which I love. I feel sad though sometime’s because I really would like to work somewhere nice and make some contacts x

Mrs OBumble

coffeeandshoes, welcome to boards.ie, it's good to have you here.

But please don't bring up old threads, it just clutters the discussion of current issues.



/moderation

Newfie III

Hi Scientist,

Firstly, I am very sorry to hear that you had such a terrible time in your last job.
I am going through a similar thing in work at the moment and I know just how difficult it is to manage.

Please don't let the last few difficult years impact on the rest of your life.

I would like to think that lightening wouldn't strike twice i.e. I would doubt you would meet similar bullies/creeps in a new lab.

What about going back to lab work part-time? Is that a possible option?
It would give you an opportunity to build your confidence back-up. If possible, you could work a 3 day week and then take on more hours if you were getting on well there.

I would imagine that having to leave your last job due to bullying must of been a very difficult decision to make, but it was a very brave decision so don't forget that or how strong you are.

Take it slowly and remember not every other lab can be as bad as your last place so take a chance on a new job.

I hope your job search goes well for you.