Children-stepchildren-Grandchildren (dogs and cats)

chucken1

How are we dealing with the new family structure? Lots of people in second relationships which brings a whole new family.
Adult children and their partners and their family.They may break up and then you've another family to deal with if they meet someone new! Step children and a whole new set of rules!
Im worried about their cat!
Serious..its a worry.
And confusing..or is it just me?

Oh_Noes

Cats are people too.

Wait, no they're not.

looksee

There aren't really any rules for families, they are all different and people deal with families differently.

I think you just have to cope with situations as they come along. If you were very close to children in a previous relationship of one of your children, then continue with it, not taking sides, just being there for them if they want it.

Spread

Out here the divorce/remarrying/shacking up situation is very common. From what I've noticed in the last 9 months, children and step children seem to get on OK ....... once the "older couple" are happy. Mind you, this is a snapshot of village life. I'm sure that out of a population of 350m you will get reams of horror cases. There is a big dislocation of family life here - not the closeness that you get in Ireland. And it really is a melting pot. A litle bit of Native American, a bit of French, a little bit of English, German, Scandanavian, Hispanic, Jewish, Italian, Russian, Finnish, Chinese, Afro American etc ........... lots of people will mention half a dozen nationalities in their genes. Am amazed at the number of ladies that divorced their old men because they "got bored". Gold digging rarily comes into the running, but the courts give decent severance packages.
Like other things in life ........ you make a mistake .......... you try and remedy it .......... and you try not to make the same mistake again. That's the best that you can do.
Everyone seeks happiness in their own way.

Rubecula

chucken1 wrote: »

How are we dealing with the new family structure? Lots of people in second relationships which brings a whole new family.
Adult children and their partners and their family.They may break up and then you've another family to deal with if they meet someone new! Step children and a whole new set of rules!
Im worried about their cat!
Serious..its a worry.
And confusing..or is it just me?

Not so new Chuck. me granny married twice mum had step brothers, step sisters and then she had half sisters and half brothers. The added complication of cousins means the family is quite large on my maternal side. (For quite large read bleedin' vast)

On my fathers side it is even more complex due to the sheer number of children the family were producing.

I just live with it as best I can. It doesn't seem strange or unusual to me. Just inconvenient unless I need help. We can be quite a close family despite the size.

Jellybaby1

Never cropped up in our families, very traditional lot we are. However, I can see it around me. A friend cried on my shoulder recently, her son's marriage broke down, his wife has the children but won't allow them any contact with dad or his family. The problem is, my friend no longer gets to see the grandchildren she loves passionately. Very, very sad.

JuliusCaesar

Not just young ones acting the maggot. In our wider family, the grandparents cut off contact with a grandchild. The grandfather forbade his wife to visit, believing all the stuff his son told about the mother. Or maybe he just felt they had to take sides. Was very sad for the child. Only now when the child has reached 18 has contact been restored. And guess what? They never had another grandchild - this is the only one.

Jellybaby1

Life's too short for this kind of behaviour. Of course we probably don't know everything about these situations but still there is a lot of heartbreak.