give me your number

LegacyUser

so your with your girlfriend for 4 years, things going ok, its had its highs and lows but its generally good.

going through one of the worse lows lately, me working unsociable hours the lat few months at work and i rarely have time to see her, but she always understands this, the last 3 times i've been free to see her and spend some quality time together (between january and now) she just makes no effort and goes out with her friends/ sisters like she does when i'm not around and we miss the opertunity.

i love her, but i feel like i'm wasting my time because shes not that keen on seeing me anyway, my minds fairly decided on that. i love her but i feel like that for her i'm only there when there are no better offers, i tried taking about it, but she just can not see things from my angle.

cut a long story short, and this will sound ridiculous.

in a local sandwich bar today, queing for a while with a friend of mine, got to the counter and was making small talk with the girl behind the counter for a few minutes.

anyway, sat down with my friend waiting for our food to arrive, food arrives and the girl from the counter slipped a coaster under my plate putting it down with her number on it.

is it a sign? should i text/ call and see where this goes? or are you going to tell me what i'm already thinking and that this is silly and to forget the whole thing?

hhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Chinafoot

obob wrote: »

i love her, but i feel like i'm wasting my time because shes not that keen on seeing me anyway, my minds fairly decided on that. i love her but i feel like that for her i'm only there when there are no better offers, i tried taking about it, but she just can not see things from my angle.

Forget about the other girl and tell your girlfriend exactly what you have written here.

If you think your relationship is over and your girlfriend is unwilling to make an effort to fix things, then you should end it. Going down the road of cheating isn't exactly going to help now is it?

LegacyUser

Chinafoot wrote: »

Forget about the other girl and tell your girlfriend exactly what you have written here.

If you think your relationship is over and your girlfriend is unwilling to make an effort to fix things, then you should end it. Going down the road of cheating isn't exactly going to help now is it?

sorry, i should have been clearer, i'm jut muddled.

i've been thinking about ending things for a little while, i think i just answered my own question.

my question should have been was the number a sign (i know signs don't really exist) that i should just end this because im wasting my time with her.

i've previously told my girlfriend how i feel, in the same sort of tone as this thread and she just doesn't seem to want to hear about it, she says i'm over analyzing things. but i feel its easy for her to say that, because she's not the one being 'left behind'. but i really like her and when we have a good time, we have a great one... its just a difficult decision. today just made me realise maybe there are other options out there.

i don't want to chuck away four years just like that, and no i wouldn't cheat... but i don't want to go on like this. i'd like to make her realise how i feel, but maybe thats just not possible?

karlitob

Chinafoot wrote: »

Forget about the other girl and tell your girlfriend exactly what you have written here.

If you think your relationship is over and your girlfriend is unwilling to make an effort to fix things, then you should end it. Going down the road of cheating isn't exactly going to help now is it?

Ohh, I was gonna say something different but damn, this is good advice Chinatown.



I went out with a girl for 3.5 years and thought that this was it, it wasnt the best but wasn;t the worst. I was gonna stick through it. She dumped me and I was a broken man and now I'm getting married... to someone else

My point is that both people in the relationship have to be happy within themselves and be happy within the relationship. If your situation isnt something that will change in the next short time then maybe your happiness is something to consider (and hers of course).

But out of respect for your past 4 years and the fact that shes a person - speak to her before you do anything with someone else.

lallychops

the reason she doesnt want to see you i would assume is because she may feel she has to make all the effort. its unfair for her to be at your beck and call when she has made plans. you cant expect her to just hang around waiting for you to come and see her etc...clearly if you cant make time for each other then you should consider talking to her. but do not expect her to not make plans just because your'e home...thats not understanding on your part....as for the other girl? gotta sort one relationship before the other....

dublin daz

If its basically over then I don't see why not, but be honest with your current girlfriend, ie end it before you start calling other girls.

HugoDrax

my question should have been was the number a sign (i know signs don't really exist) that i should just end this because im wasting my time with her.

A sign? Do you think that magically the thought got into this girl to give you a number because the universe is telling you something?
What happened is that you talked to a girl, she likes you and she wants you to call her and go out.
That's all.
It just means you are sexy.

A friend of mine is married. Before he got married he slept with more women than he could count and women are attracted to him still even though he is only interested in his wife and their young child. He gets attention everywhere he goes. Does he take this as a sign? No. It just means he is a sexy guy.

LegacyUser

"going through one of the worse lows lately, me working unsociable hours the lat few months at work and i rarely have time to see her" - OP, if I were your girlfriend, I'd be seriously fed up.

"but she always understands this" - maybe she knows there's no point complaining, has given up and doesn't care anymore.

"the last 3 times i've been free to see her and spend some quality time together (between january and now)" - are you actually saying you've only made time to see her 3 times since January?

"she just makes no effort ... and we miss the opertunity." - no, you've missed the boat.

OP, if you're thinking of giving her the heave-ho, I think maybe you're too late...