Is the ball in his counrt now?

inexperienced

I've met a guy through the internet dating web site. We met up for a coffee last Saturday. I found him a solid man and felt the chemistry to him and would like to know him more.

During we talked in the cafe, he would try to touch my back. When we were running across the road, he tried to hold my hand. Seeing this, I put my arm in his. We hugged lightly and said goodbye. He kissed on my neck.

Quickly after, I got his txt saying happy to meet me. And I replied straight away saying that I was happy I did send the message to him on web and said would like to hang out more with him.

I sent a message online to him something I said I would send him via message. But have not heard back from him even though I saw him online.

Now, is the ball in his court now? And if he's interested he would get back to me?

nolly23

Yes the ball is in his court now. If he is interested he will message you back.

Sometimes people are just polite and say they will be in touch even though they dont. I met this one guy once who begged me for my number and I eventually gave it to him. He never called. I met him months later and he said "sorry but he was an @sshole" WTF??? He was the one who was begging me.

Great if he gets back to you but dont waste your time or energy messaging him and him not responding.

HugoDrax

inexperienced wrote: »

I've met a guy through the internet dating web site. We met up for a coffee last Saturday. I found him a solid man and felt the chemistry to him and would like to know him more.

During we talked in the cafe, he would try to touch my back. When we were running across the road, he tried to hold my hand. Seeing this, I put my arm in his. We hugged lightly and said goodbye. He kissed on my neck.

Quickly after, I got his txt saying happy to meet me. And I replied straight away saying that I was happy I did send the message to him on web and said would like to hang out more with him.

I sent a message online to him something I said I would send him via message. But have not heard back from him even though I saw him online.

Now, is the ball in his court now? And if he's interested he would get back to me?

It's only been Saturday. He's probably busy working or he doesn't want to sound like he's too keen and mess things up. So wait for about midweek and he will get back to you probably looking to meet you Friday or Saturday.
If you don't hear from him by then you should contact him.
He sounds really into you so you are sure to hear from him soon and you will meet him again.
So don't worry.

Firetrap

I never buy the too busy working thing. Nobody is ever too busy that they can't take a minute out of their lives to send a text. I think the ball is in his court now though. It's ok to send a text or two but when you don't hear anything back, it's an ominous sign.

zxcvbnm1

HugoDrax wrote: »

He sounds really into you so you are sure to hear from him soon and you will meet him again.
So don't worry.

Not sure where you are getting that from ??

The guy didn't return the message online. Quite clearly the likelihood is he isn't into her b

HugoDrax

zxcvbnm1 wrote: »

Not sure where you are getting that from ??

The guy didn't return the message online. Quite clearly the likelihood is he isn't into her b

Maybe he is shy? A message from a girl a guy likes is like a hand grenade. He doesn't want to pull the pin yet and drop the grenade before it blows in his face. He might think if he responds to quickly the girl will think he is being too keen or he mightn't know what to saw. A guy who likes a girl doesn't want to say the wrong thing or make the wrong move.

IrishEyes19

I think the best thing to do in any dating situation be it online or meeting in person first, is not to expect anything. Easier said then done I know, but if you think about it, you hardly know this person, and its very easy for them to say had a lovely time, give you a kiss and then never reply again. its an easy goodbye for them and that way no awkwardness in the case if he wasnt into you.

on the other hand, as others have said, much time hasnt passed. But bear in mind, you might not be the only woman he is seeing especially if its online dating, just food for thought.

What I would do now, is leave him be and dont be too available, if he comes online, maybe go offline and see what happens.

mood

You contacted him twice and he didn't respond yet he has time to use the dating site again! Sorry but he just mustn't be interested. If he was he would reply.

Just move on and forget about him. His loss and all that!

lazygal

Agree, he's not interested. No one is too busy to send a quick message. I've been on soooooooooooooo many of those "I thought he was interested but I've never heard from him again" dates. Move right along!

inexperienced

op here.

the message i sent online was something quite deep (some information we chatted abt when we met), it would take a bit time to digest. that's why i thought he needed more time to read and reply.

the end of the story: i txted him asking how he was. he replied. i then said if he is free this weekend, do shout. that's it.

i was the first woman he met in person, so my guess was he would like to meet more women. of course, maybe i was not who he was looking for as well.

i am happy to have met him. have a nice time. it's already good.

i dont expect much, and i have already arranged things this weekend. i would keep on dating with other men i met on the site or in other places. i know there is one there for me.

i might will keep posting questions about dating here as i am not quite sure about the dating culture in ireland.

mood

I think sending a deep e-mail might not have been a good idea and could have scared him off. Where are you from? Some people may have spent time there and be able to tell you had dating in Ireland is compared to you own country.

Firetrap

Firetrap wrote: »

I never buy the too busy working thing. Nobody is ever too busy that they can't take a minute out of their lives to send a text. .

I would agree but I've managed to forget/not get around to texting back a couple of friends the last few days even when I've meant to. So it's possible, if not probable.
Still it doesn't sound like he's interested anyway so best to move on I think OP, sorry

mood

bluewolf wrote: »

I would agree but I've managed to forget/not get around to texting back a couple of friends the last few days even when I've meant to. So it's possible, if not probable.
Still it doesn't sound like he's interested anyway so best to move on I think OP, sorry

I have very occasionally done it with non important texts from friends but NEVER with a potential boyfriend I like!

inexperienced

well, that deep thing is a work of mine really. it's personal, but nothing too scary. and he said he would like to read that.

anyway, tks you guys for your advice, will keep on learning.

IrishEyes19

mood wrote: »

I think sending a deep e-mail might not have been a good idea and could have scared him off. Where are you from? Some people may have spent time there and be able to tell you had dating in Ireland is compared to you own country.

I dont really agree with that. I hate the formalities of game playing. If I go out and meet someone, Im not going to hold back on my interests or how I talk, when Im talking to someone Im interested in romantically.

if the OP, sent him an email be it "deep" about something she was interested in and so was the person she sent it too, I would be flattered but also impressed to meet someone who shared it.

Unless it was talking about getting married or moving in together on the first few weeks. Its cool to talk about shared interests.

mood

IrishEyes19 wrote: »

Unless it was talking about getting married or moving in together on the first few weeks. Its cool to talk about shared interests.

That was the sort of thing I assumed OP e-mailed about rather than a hobby or interest. Maybe I'm wrong!