Am I too weird to be in a relationship?

blurski

Well after finally meeting a guy from NZDating, the experience was ok. I eventually had to go back home, then found out he went back with his ex-partner.

I have learn't a valuable lesson to not seek relationships just to oust being single. However, I have been single for over five years and I don't know whats wrong with me? I haven't been in a relationship EVER!

I think down the track I will develop somewhat depression from trying to find somebody.

I need guidance, advice? I'm not sure if my style is tasteful enough for me to meet new people to start that spark.

I'm a 21 year old man, working full time and studying my pre-med this year. Going to university to become a doctor soon.
I have good looks (so im always told from the girls and guys). I can't work out in my head WHY CAN'T I JUST GET A BOYFRIEND!!!?

Dr. Baltar

blurski wrote: »

Well after finally meeting a guy from NZDating, the experience was ok. I eventually had to go back home, then found out he went back with his ex-partner.

I have learn't a valuable lesson to not seek relationships just to oust being single. However, I have been single for over five years and I don't know whats wrong with me? I haven't been in a relationship EVER!

I think down the track I will develop somewhat depression from trying to find somebody.

I need guidance, advice? I'm not sure if my style is tasteful enough for me to meet new people to start that spark.

I'm a 21 year old man, working full time and studying my pre-med this year. Going to university to become a doctor soon.
I have good looks (so im always told from the girls and guys). I can't work out in my head WHY CAN'T I JUST GET A BOYFRIEND!!!?

Two things:

1) You're 21 - you're young, relax.

2) Stop trying so hard. I don't know what it is, but whenever I am in a relationship people seem to be attracted to me a lot more. Perhaps it's a "want what you can't have" thing, maybe I act differently subconsciously.
The point is, trying to get a boyfriend makes you seem, well, desperate and that's unattractive. Relax, take it easy and let them come to you.

diddlybit

Hey blurski.

From reading this and reading your other posts you've probably had an emothional couple of weeks and are feeling a little down now. This will pass and hopefully, you will realise that there are loads of men out there, of which some of them you will click with, and some will click right bcak with you.

Dr. Baltar's advice was spot on. Focus on making friends and enjoying life, which will help with your confidence. That will bring them flocking to you I'm sure.

brokenice

I think at the end of the day, it never really boils down to looks anyway. It could be an underlying characteristic. For example; are you difficult to read? Can people really get to know the real you? Do you tend to shut off? Do you put up a barrier when meeting people for the first time? If you sit back and try and look at this problem, as you call it but i don't believe it is, in a new light, i'd say you'll have no problem in findng someone new. Good luck!

deasyd

I always said to myself that my perfect guy would be a handsome doctor with a great singing voice. Can you sing? If not you've got two out of three. To quote meatloaf 'two out of three ain't bad'. I'll date you Do you like Michael Buble? My BF would have to like him

You'll more than likely find that if you stop seeking a relationship so anxiously that you'll probably end up in one.

A lot of poeple here are going to say u are only 21 stop worrying, but it's obviously important to you. Do you do things to keep people interested at the start. For example, sleeping with a guy on the first date might not be a good idea. It's like opening your Christmas present on Christmas Eve. Nothing left to keep you intereted in Christmas Day.

You're certainly not too weird to be in a relationship, the problem is so many gay guys just want to sleep around. That's what gay guys are renound for.

Have confidence, be pround of who u are, keep your dignity and play hard to get. You have a lot to offer. If you come across as too eager it can be so off putting.

Best of luck in your search

jamijary

21? you have plenty of time, concentrate on the ould studies and after that you'll have plenty of time! God I sound old!

AndrewJD

University is a perfect time for relationships. You'll have no bother there.

Out of interest do you know where you're going to be studying? I'm doing first year med at Trinity right now

blurski

Hello everybody,

So far I have accepted I can't pursue a relationship with this guy even if I tried, it takes two to make a relationship and its plain obvious It can't happen...so I am still in possession of his belongings at my house, he lent me his CD's (about 15CD's). I think he still wants to come down to see me but I think its conditionally. I don't want him to come see me, I just want to send or courier the CD's to his address....any ideas? what should I say? By the way he doesn't even know that I found out he's back with the ex-partner! so yeah...i noticed he's back on the NZDating looking for more fresh meat....eww