another thread looking for advice on men!

shoes34

Not really sure how to start this, but broke up with my ex over a year ago and we have been in contact recently and chatting. Last week he asked me via text did I have thoughts on when I’d like to get married and I told him that was a personal question and he said oh when you find the right person. I didn’t text back and then a few days later got a text saying lovely weather and how he was enjoying working outdoors when it was nice.

At the weekend I text him to say Hi and he told me he was being boring and staying in and he need to get out there. So I said maybe we could go for a coffee or something but it was up to him, then last night I got a text asking me what did I mean by the text – to me it was fairly obvious that I was asking him did he want to go get a coffee sometime. I didn’t reply back as not sure what to say. I not sure what kind of advice I’m looking for to be honest. Just does anyone have ideas of what I should say or should I not text back as he must know what I meant i.e. do you want to get a coffee sometime?

Thanks.

MrThrifty

Sounds to me like someone's trying to create some excitement in their lives here... From a neutral observers point of view, while perhaps the OP may have been 'guilted' into doing so, it was them who suggested meeting up.

Regardless, bottom line is that the OP simply needs to make up their mind on whether or not they want the ex in their life from here on and in what capacity. If not, then cut off all contact and move on.

Staplor

I'd take away the some capacity bit, it's either they're going for a coffee with a view to getting back together, or they're not.

MrThrifty

Staplor wrote: »

I'd take away the some capacity bit, it's either they're going for a coffee with a view to getting back together, or they're not.

Here, here. To the point. I didn't have the guts to be so blunt in my original response!

As an aside, there should never be any obligation to meet up with people we are uncomfortable with in life, regardless of how close we once were to them or of any family connection. If it doesn't 'feel' right then don't do it.

Boskowski

What do you mean with 'what does he mean'?

The coffee line is ambiguous isn't it? It could be just a coffee it could be the universally accepted code speak for 'half a date'. At least that's what he seems to be thinking...