Sexual fantasy, am I a freak?

LegacyUser

Ok, I have been looking at this forum for a while and finally got the courage to post.

For a while now (nearly a year, maybe more), I have been finding myself really turned on by "rape fantasy" porn (I am female btw). It has got to a stage, where when browsing porn, I am searching for rape fantasy porn and that regular porn does not turn me on as much. During foreplay with my partner, there has been a couple of times, where I cannot climax without thinking about one of these fantasy videos.

Is this really abnormal? Is there something wrong with me? What can I do, to not be into this kind of thing?

Just to also mention, I find real rape one of the worst things that could ever happen a man or woman. I don't condone it any way, shape or form. It is disgusting. So why is this type of porn turning me on?

Any thoughts much appreciated. (and sorry if the above post is too explicit or offends anyone, mods please delete if appropriate)

gypsy_rose

You have nothing to be ashamed of. People have different sexual fantasies, some which are more socially acceptable perhaps than others, but as long as you're consenting with a partner and non-ones getting hurt it really isn't a problem. Don't feel ashamed, I'm female too and I know women don't really like to talk about their fantasies, but trust me, yours is a lot more common than you think Plus they're just thoughts, you can't help what you think, only what you do.

DC31

Our fantasies are just that, fantasies. They don't have to be something we necessarily want to act out in real life. I know a lot of women who fantasise about lesbian sex, but are heterosexual.

With regard to the rape scenario, I would imagine it's more the idea of submission and control that you find appealing. As you know, rape is not about sex, rather violence and/or control. I really wouldn't worry about this. You're harming no-one.

Overheal

Fetish about Dominance/Submission is fairly common:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dominance_and_submission

LegacyUser

During some conversations in mixed company recently, it emerged that in my social circle this appears to be fairly common, with no gender or sexuality barriers, ie people of all sexualities fantasising outside their usual boundries. I'd call my friends fairly "normal" people.

If you have some worries about it creeping into your sex life, I'd be willing to bet that it turns out to be a phase. Sexuality isn't something that's fixed at a point in time, we all have underlying drives that last a long time, along with tastes that change and develop along with the rest of the changes we go through. If the fantasy has arrived for you lately, it may wane as quickly, or something may replace it, or it may modify over time to something similar. If in the time it's with you, you enjoy it as nothing more that a fantasy, it adds to your enjoyment of your sex life with your partner (even if he never knows) and it doesn't do any harm, then I wouldn't see a problem.

cafecolour

According to this, 4 out of 10 women admitting having had them. So, not that uncommon

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/all-about-sex/201001/womens-rape-fantasies-how-common-what-do-they-mean

krd

disgusted11 wrote: »

Just to also mention, I find real rape one of the worst things that could ever happen a man or woman. I don't condone it any way, shape or form. It is disgusting. So why is this type of porn turning me on?

There is a huge gap between fantasy and reality.

You're probably attracted to the rape fantasy by it's absoluteness - the sexual intensity of it.

It's not an abnormal fantasy. Though the reality might be far different.

Saying that. I do know girls who have engineered situations - got a male friend drunk and taunted them into raping them. That's a relatively controlled situation - but you can imagine it going horribly wrong.

It's playing with fire - and that, I think is the attraction.

Be very f'ing careful

Kimia

krd wrote: »

There is a huge gap between fantasy and reality.

You're probably attracted to the rape fantasy by it's absoluteness - the sexual intensity of it.

It's not an abnormal fantasy. Though the reality might be far different.

Saying that. I do know girls who have engineered situations - got a male friend drunk and taunted them into raping them. That's a relatively controlled situation - but you can imagine it going horribly wrong.

It's playing with fire - and that, I think is the attraction.

Be very f'ing careful

:eek::eek: How does that even happen? How can you taunt someone into raping you?

Op, very normal fantasy for women. Apparently it's something to do with women feeling unable to 'let go' and lose control during sex because if she does she's a slut, but if she's forced to 'let go' it's not her fault (but she can still enjoy it). Don't worry about it - it means nothing in real life. Enjoy!

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

Queen-Mise

They are very common OP. Have heard of them before.

I read in Cosmo a few years ago of women who have paid to have themselves kidnapped and held for X amount of time.

krd

Permabear, I'd filter anything you have to say through your extremist economic ideology.

"free" market bukkkake, nein danke.

Morag

It is a normal sexual fanasty.
Yes it may seem rather extreme but honestly it's not.
Consentual nonconsentual sex is what it tends to be known as in kink communities.
There are massive ammounts of erotic fiction written about it at well.

It's a kink and as with most kinks the taboo nature of it can cause confusion and upset and guilt but then again the fact it is taboo also makes it hot and intresting.

Yes there are people who have this as part of thier sex lives with thier partners.
Rapeplay is part of role play for them and it happens with in agreed terms and conditions.

Ickle Magoo

krd, throwing petty insults at other posters is not permitted on this forum.

Please keep replies on topic and helpful to the OP and be aware that off-topic and unhelpful posting can earn you a ban from this forum.

If you haven't already done so, please take the time to read the [URL=" http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056181484"]forum rules[/URL] in the charter.

Many thanks.

krd

Ickle Magoo, I think you're being over zealous.

And a persons overall weltanschauung, should be taken into account when evaluating their advice or opinions.

Ickle Magoo

krd given a week off to read up on the PI charter [URL=" http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056181484"]here[/URL] if not Boards general posting etiquette here.

Back on-topic...

Sleepy

Absolutely normal fantasy for a woman. Nancy Friday, who covered it quite extensively in "My Secret Garden", related it to feelings of guilt around sex. The idea of the fantasy being that by being forced to have sex, you had nothing to feel guilty about. Strong Catholic upbringing OP?