Trying to give up praying

LegacyUser

I was raised catholic. All through life i have prayed everything i wanted something really bad.

Passs exams, get that better job, etc, I would pray. not sure if i prayed for some devine intervention to help me obtain what i was looking for or if i just done it to convince myself that someone was going to help me and i wasnt on my own with my specific issue.

Regardless of if God exists or not, I want to stop leaning to prayer when i want something. If God exists, i doubt he wants folks asking for stuf that just leads to material gain. Also, the main reason i want to stop praying everytime life gets difficult is that i want to become independent, and stop leaning on God, prayer or the idea that I can go to some higher power for help with every little thing. This belif is stealing my independence.

Has anyone ever thought about this, or have any thoughts on this?

CK2010

i think everyone does some sort of 'praying' even if its not to God. like if something is going wrong they'll wish or ask for it to get better, not to anyone just kind of saying what they want. no harm in it. some people even create wishing diaries/notice boards and the likes! with photos and all! apparently it helps to set goals and focus on achieving them. it doesnt mean your less independent imo. its like venting.

but if you do want to stop id say just say things along the lines of 'id love for..' or 'id like for this to happen..' etc, just to yourself so you dont feel like you're asking of anybody but its out of your system.

im atheist myself but theres no harm in believing in a higher being/god and having faith in them helping you when times are tough,i wouldve thought its part of what its all about- not asking for things all the time but them being there for you when you need it. if it comforts you then i dont see a problem.

hope this helps.

kerryman12

HI OP

I think I can relate to you on this one. I would consider myself reasonable religious and pray fairly regularly. I wont feel guilt also for asking for "stuff" and as a rule dont do it! Mostly I use it as a chance to say thanks!!

Maybe, this helps.

Best Regards

Kyman12

Maybe try stop praying for the little things in life? These are things you should make happen yourself (which you actually do whether you realise it or not). How about saying a prayer of thanks when things do go right instead of praying for them to go right?

Ickle Magoo

OP, there is a christianity and atheist and agnostics forum if you want a different slant on advice?

I'm not sure why you would want to stop praying if that's something that gives you comfort and makes you feel better...regardless of religious affiliations I would think most people throw wishes into the world, be they aimed at karma, mother nature, positive energy, god or whatever.

I'm also not sure why you think it's stealing your independence. Either you believe prayers can be answered, in which case you aren't wholly independent anyway - and if you don't then you're doing all the work and are fully independent regardless of any words you're throwing out there. I think you may be over-thinking this one, OP.

All the best. :cool:

tenchi-fan

I'm reading a book (the power of positive thinking)

It sounds like you're praying wrong. It sounds more like a compulsion you have than actual prayer.

The book basically says to spend most of your time praying giving thanks, rather than asking for things. When you want something, first ask God is it right for you. Then, through prayer, ask for it once.

For exam, passing an exam. Well in advance of the exam, ask for help in passing it. When you're about to study, pray for the strength to study, and at the end of a day's study give thanks that you learned so much and had a good day's study. Before the exam, say a quick prayer to ask for calmness and that the work you did will pay off.

And whenever you pray for something, you're putting your faith in God that he will provide it for you if it's right for you.

I think praying like this can help you become a calmer and more successful person. It allows you to plan your future and reflect on your past.

So maybe instead of stopping to pray altogether, just learn to do it right

bert61

interesting topic...

Ickle Magoo

Bert61, I appreciate you are new to boards and would ask that you read the forum charter [URL=" http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056181484"]here[/URL] if you wish to post in this forum.

Replies should always be on topic and helpful to the OP and you should be aware that off-topic and unhelpful posting can earn you infractions/ban from this forum.

Many thanks.

boarddotie

Do you pray for big stuff like health and safety and things like that? And if you didnt say a prayer about these things (and those you mentioned) would you start to feel gulity or nervous? If yes, then it sounds more like Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (or a compulsion, like a previous poster said). That you are praying out of fear instead of a belief in the higher being. OCD manifests itself in many ways and this can be one of them.

I know what you mean though-you dont want to 'waste' your prayers on smaller/material things.

LegacyUser

Do you pray for big stuff like health and safety and things like that? And if you didnt say a prayer about these things (and those you mentioned) would you start to feel gulity or nervous?

Yes, I pray for things like wanting a family member to be rid of an ailment, or if going into a high pressure situation i pray that i will do the right thing to help the situation, or that I will do better in my career, or that I will be happier in life.

i found that when i worried about stuff at night that prevented me from sleeping i would pray for help to get through what was bothering me, or for strength to deal with it if it didnt go how i wanted it to go.

But after a while prayer became less about talking to god or whoever and more of a reflex to a difficult situation and this is what I wanted to stop.

I felt that I was calming myself with a habbit, no different than someone going for a smoke to calm down and I would rather be able to deal with this situation on my own, and not depend on "God", or even on the crutch of prayer.

I have for the most part stopped praying in these situations, but its a conscious effort.

I think that there is nothing wrong with a crutch as long as it doesnt become a dependancy, and thats what im now working at preventing.

I just wanted to see some viewpoints on this, and there have been some very interesting points made in the thread.

Thanks posters!

tenchi-fan

tenchi-fan wrote: »

And whenever you pray for something, you're putting your faith in God that he will provide it for you if it's right for you.

...

So maybe instead of stopping to pray altogether, just learn to do it right

Both of these statements get thumbs up from me! Remember that old word 'Providence' and trust in God. After all, St. Padre Pio is known for having said 'Pray, hope, and don't worry!'

God bless.

gosuckonalemon

Can you not pray to God to ask that you find the strength to stop praying to God?
(I'm not taking the piss here btw!)