Ugh...

Local-womanizer

I was flying back into Ireland today after a week in the states,

On the plane I was sitting in the middle row,1 seat in from the aisle. I had 2 women to my right and 1 to my left.

Anyway the 2 to my right were lovely,chatted away and all that but the women on my right was very quiet,never said a word even when I needed past her. Never thought much about that mind you.......

What I did think was strange was she was watching the movie "The Town" and she seemed to have a big "thing" for Ben Affleck in it.

So here I was sitting beside a women in her 50s who what I can only assume was flicking the bean to Affleck every time he appeared on screen. She had the table down and a blanket over her lap so a positive ID was not possible, not that I wanted to find out.

She never watched the end of the movie,she watched for an hour,turned it off and went to the lavatory.

At first I had my doubts,I still just hope it was a combination of excessive drinking and extreme tiredness on my part to make me paranoid.

I also completely froze,what was I to do, say to a member of staff " sorry that women is **** to Ben Affleck!" and it turns out she has some sort of STI which is itchy and I have an even more awkward flight.

So basically my day involved me sitting beside a serial master-bater for 5 and a half hours and trying to avoid getting covered in fanny juice

Daegerty

Should have offered to give her a hand & join mile high club

Oranage2

Local-womanizer wrote: »

I was flying back into Ireland today after a week in the states,

On the plane I was sitting in the middle row,1 seat in from the aisle. I had 2 women to my right and 1 to my left.

Anyway the 2 to my right were lovely,chatted away and all that but the women on my right was very quiet,never said a word even when I needed past her. Never thought much about that mind you.......

What I did think was strange was she was watching the movie "The Town" and she seemed to have a big "thing" for Ben Affleck in it.

So here I was sitting beside a women in her 50s who what I can only assume was flicking the bean to Affleck every time he appeared on screen. She had the table down and a blanket over her lap so a positive ID was not possible, not that I wanted to find out.

She never watched the end of the movie,she watched for an hour,turned it off and went to the lavatory.

At first I had my doubts,I still just hope it was a combination of excessive drinking and extreme tiredness on my part to make me paranoid.

I also completely froze,what was I to do, say to a member of staff " sorry that women is **** to Ben Affleck!" and it turns out she has some sort of STI which is itchy and I have an even more awkward flight.

So basically my day involved me sitting beside a serial master-bater for 5 and a half hours and trying to avoid getting covered in fanny juice

no reccesion in the wonanizers house hold

Gran Hermano

Cork DJ in drag?

Tubsandtiles

Op sorry I couldn't resist, love Big Ben .

Daegerty

Oranage2 wrote: »

no reccesion in the wonanizers house hold

I would imagine mentioning that was part of the reason for starting the thread.

OutlawPete

That's why the ladies call him .. Ben Afaflick.

phasers

if you think you can get covered in ejaculatory fluid while sitting beside a woman i think you need to open a book

Local-womanizer

Oranage2 wrote: »

no reccesion in the wonanizers house hold

How dare you! I just came in here voicing my displeasure of such acts in First Class!

Chaotic_Forces

Local-womanizer wrote: »

I was flying back into Ireland today after a week in the states,

On the plane I was sitting in the middle row,1 seat in from the aisle. I had 2 women to my right and 1 to my left.

Anyway the 2 to my right were lovely,chatted away and all that but the women on my right was very quiet,never said a word even when I needed past her. Never thought much about that mind you.......

What I did think was strange was she was watching the movie "The Town" and she seemed to have a big "thing" for Ben Affleck in it.

So here I was sitting beside a women in her 50s who what I can only assume was flicking the bean to Affleck every time he appeared on screen. She had the table down and a blanket over her lap so a positive ID was not possible, not that I wanted to find out.

She never watched the end of the movie,she watched for an hour,turned it off and went to the lavatory.

At first I had my doubts,I still just hope it was a combination of excessive drinking and extreme tiredness on my part to make me paranoid.

I also completely froze,what was I to do, say to a member of staff " sorry that women is **** to Ben Affleck!" and it turns out she has some sort of STI which is itchy and I have an even more awkward flight.

So basically my day involved me sitting beside a serial master-bater for 5 and a half hours and trying to avoid getting covered in fanny juice

And you say it was a woman doing that, to herself? Methinks you had way too much to drink or... you have kinky thoughts that you express on the boards.

smk89

Oranage2 wrote: »

no reccesion in the wonanizers house hold

Didn't AH just have a thread on how annoying that phrase is?

ardinn

phasers wrote: »

if you think you can get covered in ejaculatory fluid while sitting beside a woman i think you need to open a book

Your doing it wrong!

Local-womanizer

phasers wrote: »

if you think you can get covered in ejaculatory fluid while sitting beside a woman i think you need to open a book

I was more worried about where her hands were going when they surfaced again!

Chaotic_Forces wrote: »

And you say it was a woman doing that, to herself? Methinks you had way too much to drink or... you have kinky thoughts that you express on the boards.

I wasn't drinking on the plane And there was nothing kinky about this women...

UsernameInUse

Local-womanizer wrote: »

I was flying back into Ireland today

My condolences.

alwaysadub

It's always the quiet ones you have to watch out for!

Chaotic_Forces

Local-womanizer wrote: »

I was more worried about where her hands were going when they surfaced again!



I wasn't drinking on the plane And there was nothing kinky about this women...

Ah so you were sober and claim a woman was having a ****... ?

Local-womanizer

Chaotic_Forces wrote: »

Ah so you were sober and claim a woman was having a ****... ?

Yes,I can only go on what the situation presented me at the time...

Chaotic_Forces

Local-womanizer wrote: »

Yes,I can only go on what the situation presented me at the time...

You're just posting a fantasy aren't you?

Local-womanizer

Chaotic_Forces wrote: »

You're just posting a fantasy aren't you?

Ah feck,might as well close the thread,I've been rumbled!

But no,I think it actually happened, and it has ruined that movie for me too.

Chaotic_Forces

Local-womanizer wrote: »

Ah feck,might as well close the thread,I've been rumbled!

But no,I think it actually happened, and it has ruined that movie for me too.

Why didn't you ask her to do you too?

HoneyRyder

phasers wrote: »

if you think you can get covered in ejaculatory fluid while sitting beside a woman i think you need to open a book

I think you need to watch more porn!

DUB777

Gran Hermano wrote: »

Cork DJ in drag?

Haha Love it :cool:

Senna

Somewhere there's a woman telling her friends about the weirdo beside her on the plane, "he kept staring over at me, i got so freaked out i couldn't finish watching my film and had to go to the toilet to get away from the pervert"

Hande hoche!

Did you at least scream at her "Go Sox!"?

Saila

deadly!

ArtSmart

Local-womanizer wrote: »

I was flying back into Ireland today after a week in the states,

On the plane I was sitting in the middle row,1 seat in from the aisle. I had 2 women to my right and 1 to my left.

Anyway the 2 to my right were lovely,chatted away and all that but the women on my right was very quiet,never said a word even when I needed past her. Never thought much about that mind you.......

What I did think was strange was she was watching the movie "The Town" and she seemed to have a big "thing" for Ben Affleck in it.

So here I was sitting beside a women in her 50s who what I can only assume was flicking the bean to Affleck every time he appeared on screen. She had the table down and a blanket over her lap so a positive ID was not possible, not that I wanted to find out.

She never watched the end of the movie,she watched for an hour,turned it off and went to the lavatory.

At first I had my doubts,I still just hope it was a combination of excessive drinking and extreme tiredness on my part to make me paranoid.

I also completely froze,what was I to do, say to a member of staff " sorry that women is **** to Ben Affleck!" and it turns out she has some sort of STI which is itchy and I have an even more awkward flight.

So basically my day involved me sitting beside a serial master-bater for 5 and a half hours and trying to avoid getting covered in fanny juice

Are you absolutely sure your user name/ moniker is appropriate for you?

cos i'm not convinced.

Metallitroll

Ugh.. lemme guess op, you just bedded eternal? :pac::pac::pac:

eternal

yep that was was me on the plane ,30 years older and publicly masterbating .Yep .

Hank_Jones

Matt Damon.

Ev84

phasers wrote: »

if you think you can get covered in ejaculatory fluid while sitting beside a woman i think you need to open a book

HoneyRyder wrote: »

I think you need to watch more porn!

F**k watching it... Experience it

longshanks

You spent a week in the states and now you're calling the toilet a lavatory.
Congrats on that .

sdanseo

There was a woman flicking herself off beside you and you felt uncomfortable? Jesus, you should have been following her to the jacks and asking here if she needed a hand...she would clearly have accepted.

a-k-47

could of asked her 'enjoying the movie?'.

gonedrinking

OutlawPete wrote: »

That's why the ladies call him .. Ben Afaflick.

Bean Afaflick

kfallon

Local-womanizer wrote: »

So basically my day involved me sitting beside a serial master-bater for 5 and a half hours and trying to avoid getting covered in fanny juice

That is most guys fantasy.....but they want to be covered in fanny juice

galwayrush

At least you the plane didn't go down.;)

tan11ie

Ben Affleck mmmmmmm what's a girl to do.....;)

TeddyTedson

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ozZnkbrauSo

STIG83

Just remember masterbating on a plane is not illegal it's just frowned upon!!

Rubberlegs

"Flicking the bean" makes me want to vomit:(.

kiddums

ardinn wrote: »

Your doing it wrong!

Your reading it wrong.

He said beside. I don't see how he could get covered by being beside her.
Below, in front or on top I can figure, but not beside. Especially since she was sitting.

Mr Benevolent

73Cat wrote: »

"Flicking the bean" makes me want to vomit:(.

You're doing it wrong too.

OP, hand your mancard back at reception immediately.

Phill Ewinn

did you not say anything about her to the other two? Could have had a foursome there. Or a mass-debate on the topic of public masterbation.

Local-womanizer

To address some issues here:

1.She was not the type of women you would want to help in a situation like this,so I decided not to intervene.

2.Fanny juice transfered to fingers transfered to me through here accidentally touching me.

3.If I told someone else and she wasn't flicking the bean then I would look weird.

4.It was not my fantasy, I would never have Ben Affleck in my fantasy!

I come on here to disclose my displeasure of such acts and suddenly I am the pervert or the discussion focuses mainly on the dynamics of fanny juice!

blackdog2

You know, there are many people who would pay for that kind of action, you should be thankful for what you have and not come on here moaning about it