Plethora of Problems

LegacyUser

Hi everyone,

(Background: In my 3rd Year of a degree program, 22 years old)

I just felt I had to come here as going to friends really isn't an option given that they mostly are guys and hate talking about emotional difficulties.

My main problem is career centered. I'm in a fairly 'decent' course and a professional discipline I've always wanted to be apart of, however I've come under grave difficulties during it and will have no choice but to abandon it. And the reasons are as follows; I was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome two years ago and have been receiving treatment ever since.

However my difficulties in entering group social situations have been metastasizing at an alarming rate, so much so that I haven't entered class since last November and have practically been informed by the department that I've failed the year. I really can't enter class-group social settings and perform never mind try and perform the many presentations which are required. I've contacted the department numerous times however there is only so much they can do...which is entirely understandable and I've commended them on their efforts.

As a consequence of my failing career, I practically spent many months bathing in alcohol which came at a hefty price-tag. Only now do I understand the severity of my finances which are in the red to the tune of €8,000 and eventually won't be able to afford to repay. I was thinking of transferring to another course but found out this would mean receiving no grant next year (€6,200) and paying full fees for the remaining years...again, a situation I cannot afford. My parents/family cannot afford to pay for this either as they are as financially strangled as me at the moment.

I really don't see a solution out of this situation and so came here to vent and see if anyone had any potential answers. I'd appreciate any assistance.

Thanks

LegacyUser

Wow. That is quite the pickle. First of all, you come across as a highly-intelligent person who shouldn't allow their condition to encroach on the standard of their life. I realise that it is a difficult condition to have, but there has to be some treatments available/ medication. Have you looked into behavioural therapy or something similar that will help you function in social settings? If you aspire to have a very solitary career you will do fantastically (like engineering or science), but working in groups is a big aspect in a lot of jobs. You shouldn't allow your intelligence to go to waste, you seem to really have something to offer the world (as queer as that sounds).

The money shouldn't be an issue. Drinking was idiotic, but it's over and done with, learn from it. Now go on and figure out how to get some money. The university should have an access office that might be able to give you financial assistance. Talk to your GP/ parents about this as well.. There are services available to you that will get you to where you want to be.

Let us know how you get on, take care.

LegacyUser

see if you can get a doctor to certify that you were unable to complete the year due to illness. Usually if that happens you can repeat the year free of charge as the reason you're repeating is medical.

If the anxiety you're experiencing is that great you probably should qualify on medical grounds. Keep getting help though, the presentations are awful but important.

You've made it to 3rd year and a good bit of the way through the year at that. 3rd year is very often the hardest year of a degree (I'm in 4th year of mine and am finding it much easier than 3rd year). You're obviously bright and well able for it, try talking to the college and see waht they can do about declaring you to need to repeat on medical grounds. Do try and stick with it.

It may seem strange but you really don't have to integrate with the class. I don't have AS but I also don't do much interacting with my class. sometimes people just dont fit into their class and ya know. it happens. don't be afraid to be on your own if you'd rather be on your own.

It sounds like you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself to fit in and to be sociable and to interact - that's well and good if you're coping with that pressure but you're obviously not. Just be yourself.

See how much money you can make between now and the start of the next college year - it may not pay off all your debt but it can be a start - enough anyway to get you through anoter year of college. Speak to people in the student's union as well, they should be able to give you good advice on what your financial options are or could point you in the right direction.

It might seem like you're in hell now but you'll be ok. You will be ok. Try not to perseverate too much about

LegacyUser

Thanks for the responses thus far,

@ Advice...: With respect to the behavioral therapy option, I've already been involved with that side of things however found it very self-limiting and ironically my emotions felt worse as the months wound on. That's not to say it's a useless practice, but for some reason it just didn't seem to work well for me.

I've always wanted a solitary career in science as I believe in my abilities in this field and know I can excel. Of course the only boundary between me and the career I aspire to have now is the dilemma I'm in. If only I could figure out a way to financially dig myself out.

@food4thought: Even if I did receive certification to repeat the year I'd be faced with the same prospects next year if I chose to continue the course. I really know inside I won't ever be able to cope in the settings they impose on students, so transferring I think is the only option.

I appreciate all the advice guys :-)

LegacyUser

I would reconsider behavioural therapy. It shouldn't be self-limiting, but should push you to get into social activities and see how you cope. Developing social skills might be your main area to work on. As a scientist you should be able to use logic applied to emotion and behaviour through behavioural experiments. If the social side of things are holding you back you need to work on them to attain your goals.

As with regards to the money issues.. Yes, if you fail a year and have to repeat it you will have to pay for it, but you shouldn't have to pay for the year after that. You only have to pay for the modules you have failed in. This may not be the case for the institution you are currently studying in. Talking to Academic Advisory/ Careers/ Campus Counselors will be your first real port of call.

I understand that your family is having money difficulties, but you should be on some sort of disability payment (though I'm sure you don't identify as disabled, and rightly so, you could be eligible for grants under certain schemes in the institution). Working on trying to pay off your debt is the next situation is made significantly more difficult by your condition. If you can't work part-time behind a till, for example, you could try to give grinds in science to friends or students in earlier years? You could charge up to 40 euro an hour giving good grinds, particularly if you have gotten top marks in your exams.

Good luck with everything, and I have no doubts that someone with your intellect will get themselves out of this without the help of boards.ie