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Q & A

  • 13-03-2011 9:41pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,356 ✭✭✭


    Q. How can you tell when an auto mechanic just had sex?
    A. One of his fingers is clean.

    Q. What’s the difference between a toad and a horny toad?
    A. One goes “ribbit” the other goes “rub it”.’

    Q. Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women?
    A. He died laughing before he could tell anybody.

    Q. Why does the bride always wear white?
    A. Well aren’t all kitchen appliances that colour?

    Q. What do you do with 365 used rubbers?
    A. Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

    Q. Why is air a lot like sex?
    A. Because it’s no big deal unless you’re not getting any.

    Q. What did the egg say to the boiling water?
    A. “How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago.”

    Q. What’s the best thing about a blow job?
    A. Ten minutes of silence!

    Q. Why did Frosty the Snowman pull down his pants?
    A. He heard the snow blower coming.

    Q. What do the spice girls and a pack of M+Ms have in common?
    A. There are assorted colors, but they all taste the same.

    Q. What do you call an Alabama farmer with a sheep under each arm?
    A. Pimp.

    Q. What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
    A. Polaroids.

    Q. What is the difference between a hockey game and a High School reunion?
    A. At a hockey game you see fast pucks.

    Q. What is the difference between a bachelor and a married man?
    A. Bachelor comes home, sees what’s in the refrigerator, goes to bed. Married man comes home, sees what’s in the bed, and goes to the refrigerator.

    Q. You know why they say that eating oysters will improve a man’s sex life?
    A. Because women know if he’ll eat one of those, he’ll eat anything!

    Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring, and good looking?
    A. They already have boyfriends.

    Q. What’s the difference between a new husband and a new dog.
    A. After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

    Q. Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
    A. Just when it’s getting interesting, they’re finished until next time.

    Q. How can you tell a tough lesbian bar?
    A. Even the pool table has no balls.

    Q. How can you tell a head nurse?
    A. She’s the one with the dirty knees!

    Q. Difference between a man buying a lottery ticket and a man fighting with his wife…
    A. A man has a chance at winning at the lottery.


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