Should you take yourself seriously?

LegacyUser

I always hear people say things like: "I dont take myself serious because lifes too short" or "dont take things so serious because its bad for your health." What does this mean, Why should you not take things seriously?
I was watching Graham Norton the other night and Stanley Tucci was on and he said that when he was a young actor he took himself very seriously but as he got older he learned that he had to stop doing this because it was deadly(and not deadly as in good). What did he mean by that? On the other hand I hear people say things like you have to take your job seriously or whatever in order to be successful.
Personally Im involved in athletics and in order to compete you have to take it very seriously, same for any pro athletes like footballers. If they didnt take it seriously they'd be another "also ran" another chump who just faded into the background and never accomplished anything stand out in their life.
The reason I ask is because lately Ive been feeling stressed. I take a lot of things very seriously, especially training, competing and work. I know a guy whos now 54 and a few years ago he had a heart attack even though he was an athlete who never smoke or drank or even ate junk food. He was in great shape except for the fact that he was stressed a fair bit. Im worried that Im heading in the same direction as this guy that when I hit 50, or even before that, I'll give myself a heart attack.
I guess what Im asking is how do I do a good job, get the absolute best from myself in sport and other areas of my life, without taking things so seriously?

Miss Fluff

It means doing your best while retaining perspective.

So for example, you can be really good at your job, and you are consciencious but you don't let it take over your life. Does a workaholic lie on their death bed in the wake of a huge coronary at 45 and sigh "Jeez I wish I'd spent more time in the office...."? Um, no. But you can still be hugely successful in work and maintain happy relationships and take part in lots of extra curricular activites while having perspective.

If you find yourself getting overly stressed then you know you need to start compartmentalising areas of your life. All you can do is try your best but not to the detriment of other areas or indeed other people....

Cheap Thrills!

Serious_man wrote: »

I always hear people say things like: "I dont take myself serious because lifes too short" or "dont take things so serious because its bad for your health." What does this mean, Why should you not take things seriously?
I was watching Graham Norton the other night and Stanley Tucci was on and he said that when he was a young actor he took himself very seriously but as he got older he learned that he had to stop doing this because it was deadly(and not deadly as in good). What did he mean by that? On the other hand I hear people say things like you have to take your job seriously or whatever in order to be successful.
Personally Im involved in athletics and in order to compete you have to take it very seriously, same for any pro athletes like footballers. If they didnt take it seriously they'd be another "also ran" another chump who just faded into the background and never accomplished anything stand out in their life.
The reason I ask is because lately Ive been feeling stressed. I take a lot of things very seriously, especially training, competing and work. I know a guy whos now 54 and a few years ago he had a heart attack even though he was an athlete who never smoke or drank or even ate junk food. He was in great shape except for the fact that he was stressed a fair bit. Im worried that Im heading in the same direction as this guy that when I hit 50, or even before that, I'll give myself a heart attack.
I guess what Im asking is how do I do a good job, get the absolute best from myself in sport and other areas of my life, without taking things so seriously?

OP, it's all to do with your attitudes and beliefs. I highlighted the bit above as it illustrates what seems to indicate a core belief you have. That life is all about success and accomplishments. In other words 'proving' to others that you are worthwhile.

But as we mature and get older in life we realise those things are not as important as we thought. In fact a life lived to impress others may feel quite empty.

Each person is responsible for bringing themselves happiness. Generally humans reach happiness through relationships, satisfying activities and a good environment.

Life is about far more than 'winning' -that can bring satisfaction. But not on it's own. Trophies won't keep you warm at night.

Think about developing other things, relaxation, hobbies done for simple pleasure, hanging out with people etc

Trooperboyo

It depends on the type of person you are. I do take things seriously according to a laid back person I know, because I want things done to absolute perfection and on time. It motivates me to get a job done well and on time with anything I do be work or training, its my work ethic. I think it is a very good attitude to have as opposed to someone who does things half arrsed or puts minimal effort in, thats my opinion and it's just how some people roll.

Although I do make the effort to unwind and get some me time such as fishing, going out for a walk, mountain climbing exc to take my mind off things. Just try and do unrelated activities/hobbies to take your mind off it.

Firetrap

It's how you perceive yourself I think. My definition of not taking myself too seriously would probably differ from yours. I think the main thing is not to beat yourself up about making mistakes, not be too intense, have an ability to laugh at yourself if you do something stupid and to realise that you can't change all of the world's ills.

In your case, it probably means that although you are aiming to be the best you can, you shouldn't get too wrapped up in it. You need to switch off and enjoy life a bit.

In your friend's case, who knows what caused it? It could have been stress but equally, it could have been genetic, he could have born with a faulty heart or perhaps at some stage he got sick and it weakened it? The truth is that no matter how well people try to live, some will run into trouble anyway.

It's not a good idea to take life too seriously because you won't always be on top.. If you attribute your happiness to competitive and career success, you will go through bad patches that other people aren't exposed to.

I think it's much healthier to have a relaxed attitude to life.. If you have enough to survive, good. If you're fit enough to go about life, good. Taking all these things too seriously will lead to depression as it won't always work out.

Distorted

All good replies. I think the saying "don't take yourself too seriously" is good if you take it to mean that you don't overedo it so that what you're doing becomes excessive, that you ensure you have other outlets rather than obsessing over one thing, and so on. But if you use it as an excuse for chronic laziness or under-acheivement, then its rubbish.

But as a fellow athlete, it can be impossible to explain to some non-athletes that you have to be dedicated to training, you cannot drink the night before a big race, you cannot eat takeaways every night, you cannot miss training, etc.. The comment in that sort of context I ignore. OTOH if you over-train, train when injured, don't eat right, etc that would become negative.

I suspect that as you become more experienced in what you are doing as you get older, the thought patterns your brain has to go through to prepare you for action become more well established and you can relax more while still performing well. Not everyone is the same though. Some people thrive on pressure and being on their nerves.

LegacyUser

Distorted wrote: »

All good replies. I think the saying "don't take yourself too seriously" is good if you take it to mean that you don't overedo it so that what you're doing becomes excessive, that you ensure you have other outlets rather than obsessing over one thing, and so on. But if you use it as an excuse for chronic laziness or under-acheivement, then its rubbish.

But as a fellow athlete, it can be impossible to explain to some non-athletes that you have to be dedicated to training, you cannot drink the night before a big race, you cannot eat takeaways every night, you cannot miss training, etc.. The comment in that sort of context I ignore. OTOH if you over-train, train when injured, don't eat right, etc that would become negative.

I suspect that as you become more experienced in what you are doing as you get older, the thought patterns your brain has to go through to prepare you for action become more well established and you can relax more while still performing well. Not everyone is the same though. Some people thrive on pressure and being on their nerves.

Yep, great answers from all. I think I have a clearer picture now of what it means not to take yourself so seriously. Its definitely going to be a tough one for me to get to grips with, I find it hard not to take things like sport or work not so seriously. More specifically I'd find it hard to exist in some sort of middle ground. In the past I have gone the other way completely and havent taken anything seriously, which didnt work either, I just ended up pissing people off. Its seems like Life just doesnt like extremes in either direction: If you're not dedicated you go nowhere. If youre too dedicated you implode.
Anyway thanks for the answers.