Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Making Friends

  • 03-03-2011 3:35pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi all,

    Im a boards user, but i really dont feel comfortable posting under my username so apologies for the guest tag.

    Basically im having a very bad patch where i feel very alone. Maybe a bit of backstory can help.

    Im male im 24 and i never had a problem like this. I have a wonderful girlfriend and an ok job, but i dont have many friends and i have very few hobbies (blame work for that) anytime i do have off i usually play some xbox or go for a walk.

    I used to have plenty of friends a few years back, but have either outgrown them or had a major falling out with them (personal reasons), and since then ive had no real close friends, i have 2 or 3 female friends and thats grand (makes me sound gay i know). but i find it hard to make any other friends, especially male ones. And i have no idea why, im a likeable guy apparently.
    Could it be down to that im feeling depressed lately and im over analysing everything?


Comments

  • #2
    Taltos
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,830 ✭✭✭✭Taltos


    OP - there isn't much here to go on - let me summarize what we have right now.

    1. Free time = x-box or walk - no socializing, no calling mates, no doing activities taht actually involve other physical people...

    2. Old frends - either you outgrew them / fell-out with them. But no indication at the cause of the falling out - who initiated, how did you try to resolve it etc.

    3. a few female friends - so good you do have some friends - but now you say it makes you sound gay. Majorly immature view OP... You have friends but in that one comment you have effectively measured and dismissed those friendships - almost like you are embarrased?

    So - can you add more detail to any of the above?
    Maybe also focus on why having female friends made you put in that descriptor?

    If you are suffering from depression though - then the best thing you can do instead of posting here is go straight round to your GP and start getting treatment...


  • #3
    Wompa1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,193 ✭✭✭Wompa1


    Questionable chap wrote: »
    Hi all,

    Im a boards user, but i really dont feel comfortable posting under my username so apologies for the guest tag.

    Basically im having a very bad patch where i feel very alone. Maybe a bit of backstory can help.

    Im male im 24 and i never had a problem like this. I have a wonderful girlfriend and an ok job, but i dont have many friends and i have very few hobbies (blame work for that) anytime i do have off i usually play some xbox or go for a walk.

    I used to have plenty of friends a few years back, but have either outgrown them or had a major falling out with them (personal reasons), and since then ive had no real close friends, i have 2 or 3 female friends and thats grand (makes me sound gay i know). but i find it hard to make any other friends, especially male ones. And i have no idea why, im a likeable guy apparently.
    Could it be down to that im feeling depressed lately and im over analysing everything?

    I'm nearly the same bar the females friends. I did have a few female friends but my ex girlfriend got bent out of shapre about them so I let them drift. All my other friends have moved away.

    Thanks to working too much over the last nearly 2 years I haven't had much time for hobbies and I'm at a stage now where all I do is walk, go on the net or play Xbox. I live in 1 bed apartment too..I'm starting to feel very lonely


  • #4
    Taltos
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,830 ✭✭✭✭Taltos


    As a gamer myself I know how that one goes guys.
    As hard as it is you have to put it away for a while - look into some activities in your areas - running clubs, social events, anything really...

    You have to get out and start talking to people, otherwise if all your time is spent on the box you will never have an opportunity to laugh with someone or share a story.

    Saying that though - I have to admit I enjoy the 360 as a stress buster, but up until recently I was running with groups from work 2 or 3 times a week - felt wonderful. Gave me something to chat to others about - had races to plan - but then injury struck. Just look around and see what is on close to where you are - don't limit yourselves to something in your comfort zone - try something zany - abseiling? wall/rock climbing? Just something a bit different. Many activities have a social aspect - so after a few meets see if you can join the others for a drink or a coffee...

    Now - go turn off that xbox - find something for tomorrow - and go get some sleep so you can head out. Expect to not enjoy everything - plan to have some bad experiences - but just keep doing it - find something that really lights you up... Once you find something you enjoy - your whole body language will change and trust me - folk can tell... I still get strangers talking to me when I am out - and sometimes now I strike up random chats with others I meet - you would be surprised how many folk just want a bit of a chat now and again - chat thought - not rant over politics etc... :)

    Again though - if depressed seek advice fast. Pot and all that.


Advertisement