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Thursday Funnies

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  • 03-03-2011 11:25am
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 8,295 ✭✭✭


    Two babies were sitting in their cots.

    One baby shouted to the other.... "Are you a little girl or a little boy?"

    "I don't know"... replied the other baby giggling.

    "What do you mean... you don't know?"... said the first baby.

    "I mean I don't know how to tell the difference".

    "Well... I do"... said the first baby chuckling. "I'll climb into your cot and find out".

    He carefully manoeuvred himself into the other baby's cot... then quickly disappeared beneath the blankets.

    After a couple of minutes... he resurfaced with a big grin on his face.

    "You're a little girl... and I'm a little boy"... he said proudly.

    "You're ever so clever"... cooed the baby girl... "but how can you tell?".

    "It's quite easy really"... replied the baby boy...

    "you've got pink booties.... and I've got blue ones!".

    __________________________________

    Five people.... Four guys and a young woman were on a plane when it suddenly plunged into the sea.

    Miraculously all five survived the crash..... but they found themselves stranded on a desert island.

    Since the guys needed to satisfy their natural urges.... With the woman's agreement they drew up a rota whereby each would take it in turn to have sex with her as much as possible for a week at a time.

    The arrangement worked really well for the next six years.... Satisfying both the guys and the nymphomaniac woman....

    Until she died unexpectedly.

    The first month went by.... and it was awful for the guys.

    The second was really terrible...

    the third month was almost unbearable....

    By the fourth month they couldn't take it anymore.....








    SO.... THEY BURIED HER!.

    __________________________________

    She was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only The 'T' shirt that she normally slept in.

    As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said softly,

    “You’ve got to make love to me this very moment!"

    My eyes lit up and I thought,

    "I am either still dreaming or this is going to be my lucky day!"

    Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table.

    Afterwards she said, "Thanks," and returned to the stove,her T-shirt still around her neck.

    Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked, "What was that all about?"


    She explained,







    "The egg timer's broken!"

    =(:-) Me? I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude (-:)=



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