Asking her out

LegacyUser

sorry if this should be in another forum... i suffer from low confidence and am generally a shy guy, however since finishing college and not being able to get work ive taken up walking/jogging to pass my days in the local park, the past few months i meet this girl nearly daily, at first she never said anything but gradually over time i now get a smile and a hi, i really like this girl and i think the signs are there she likes me (lets hope), i just need to get the courage to ask her out but she is always wearing headphones like myself and i just dont no how to stop her and ask her out, and what to say to her even, christ im useless haha

cantdecide

It would require some subtle engineering if you don't want to come off as a stalker. From out of nowhere you could try a very much more lingering eye contact and smile one of these days. Then ditch the headphones the days after that. She might get the hint that you want to chat.

I definitely think you can't be too blatant in case you have gotten things wrong. You definitely can't ask her our without having struck up some kind of rapport with her. It's not a pub, it's real life so you can't come out with it too early.

There are too many variables to know how you can 'safely' engineer conversation at this stage.

LegacyUser

yeah very true would seem a bit random out of know were asking her out, thanks for advice yeah got to ditch the headphones so and play the game but as you say not to the stalker level... complex creatures these women

Overheal

Wait at a bench and do some stretches? She may stop too and strike up a conversation.

-Corkie-

As said before but maybe when you stop you could compare what music she is listening to etc.

Birdsong

lots of things you could ask without appearing stalkerish
seeing as she's out runnning on a regularly, you could ask her if she fancied meeting up for a run, its always easier run with company or ask her if she's in the local running club - your thinking of joining;) or talk about races, is she in training for any - lots of stuff.

LegacyUser

you already have something in common so need to panic on that front. You dont want to think to yourself "dont come across weird" because you certainly will if your over paranoid about it. Just think of a few things to say and a way to get talking to her. I thought if you blatantly fell on front of her but then I thought how stupid it was lol....DONT do that! or learn some mad stretching that shed laugh at.......I seem intent on causing you to make a fool of yourself lol

Im sure youll come up with some ingenious way of doing it that doesnt involve hurting yourself

good luck

RuthieC

From the way you describe it, you run in opposite directions... towards each other? Well how about dropping something 'by accident' just before you pass each other, and let her stop you to give it back?

LegacyUser

i think we have the makings of a good carry on film there lol, ahh ill play it by year i suppose ill ditch the headphones for one and see how we get on, ill leave the falling in front of her till last resort haha

LegacyUser

Bro, if you think that she's "hopefully"attracted to you, that's not an overly positive sign.

That's your gut, hoping like hell..

In this situation, what you wanna do is something to catch her attention.
Something where she'll look at you and think, "oh wow, look at that guy, i'm impressed".

Now, you couldn't have a better setup to do this.

Your already on greeting terms with her, so in her head, she almost certainly has you marked down as a "nice guy", and that's a major bonus to have.


Your in a walking/jogging park, so let's use that.

I don't know exactly your situation, but let me create a scenario, and that should give you an idea.


You show up early, you get warmed up, do a good stretch routine.

Once that's done, get a little millage in - 2 miles about - just to get that endurance conditioning up.

At this point, you've jogged by her or whatever, said hello, and she's noted that you've taken a more serious approach to what is normally, a nice easy routine - so you've got her attention.

Then start doing something a little more hardcore - 200 m strides(75% sprints)/100m walk recovery.

Do them in sets of 3, then walk 400m - do about 5 or 6 of them total, then stretch out again.


Hopefully she'll have seen you doing this, and how absorbed you were in your workout.
Now her interest is really developing.


Cool down with another couple of miles, if your lucky, maybe nod to get her attention - with her new found interest, she might come and speak with you.

Maybe you can cool down together - get another bit of millage in, another 2 miles say, where you can chat at a nice easy (but not too easy) pace.

Then tell her you hope to see her next week, and give her a pleasant, warm, but not overly enthusiastic goodbye, and tell her your off to do some plyometric work to finish your routine for the day.


Do 10 push ups, 10 squat jumps, 10 sit ups - do all that about 3/4 times, until your body says it's content.

Go home, shower, eat good.

Feel your confidence rise, feel her interest in you rise.