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Advice on ending relationship

  • 16-02-2011 3:45pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 462 ✭✭


    Ive been seeing a girl for the last few months but Im not in love with her and dont see a future in the relationship. It seems to me like shes really into me and wants a seriousrelationship. I do like her and wouldn’t mind a casual relationship but I dont feel like its fair to her to keep it going, letting her think its getting more serious (eg meeting family and such) when I know it isnt. What I want to know is if you were in the girls situation would you rather it be broken off now or only when there was an immediate reason for it (eg meeting someone else)?


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,376 ✭✭✭metrovelvet


    Yes. It's imbalanced and you are stringing her along.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    Are you really asking if people would rather be strung along until their partners find someone else Vs be told up front how their partner feels/doesn't feel for them or have I picked you up wrongly? :confused:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 734 ✭✭✭astra2000


    You should finish it now, imho it would be so much more hurtful if you were to finish it because you met someone else, the same as been cheated on tbh. Also you risk ending up in a long term relationship with this girl if you continue seeing her, sometimes circumstances dictate events. If you are positive that she is not the one be fair to her and end it after all you been with her could mean that she is missing out on meeting the guy for her.


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,361 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    What I want to know is if you were in the girls situation would you rather it be broken off now or only when there was an immediate reason for it

    Tell her asap.
    Nobody wants to be strung along and the longer you leave it the more she will think ye have something together.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 462 ✭✭lunacyfoundme


    Probably didnt do a great job get my point across there, at work and balancing a lot of things at once.

    I didnt really mean is it a good idea to string her along. Ive been single a very long time and meant should I just be glad of what I have (some company) and if someone I like better comes along then break up with her. But thinking about it I think I know myself that still wouldnt be fair to her and I dont want to hurt her anymore than I have to.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 622 ✭✭✭Corkblowin


    Ive been single a very long time and meant should I just be glad of what I have (some company) and if someone I like better comes along then break up with her.

    The fact that you even have a thought like this means you should set this girl free now. Saying 'you'll do' is no basis for a relationship.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    OP, let her go and find someone who appreciates her and loves her and realises how special she is. Im sure you really like her, but its not enough and she deserves to be with someone who wants her above any other girl, not someone who wants her until someone better comes along. You owe that to her, and if you let her go you may find a girl who you feel about in that way too. Do it sooner rather than later before she becomes invested and it hurts her more.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 309 ✭✭greenprincess


    Tell her now!


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