Tuesday Funnies

MonkieSocks

A tough looking group of bikers were riding when they saw a girl about to jump off a bridge so they stop.

The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says,

"What are you doing ?"

"I'm going to commit suicide," she says.

While he did not want to appear insensitive, he didn't want to miss an opportunity he asked

"Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a Kiss ?"

So, she does and it was a long, deep lingering kiss.

After she's finished, the biker says,

"Wow ! That was the best Kiss I have ever had.

That's a real talent you are wasting.

You could be famous.

Why are you committing suicide ?"





"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl......"

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2 Blonde's where telling jokes, one says 'Knock Knock',

The other got up and answered the door!

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Said to my missus

"Hey fat arse ,what do you want for your birthday ?

She said "Don't get fecking lippy".

I said "mascara it is then".

twistyj

Why isnt there any medicine in the jungle?





Because the parrots-eat-em-all....:D