Tuesday

MonkieSocks

Bob and his friend, Joe, went out hunting.

This was Joe’s first time ever hunting, so he was following Bob’s lead.

Bob saw a small herd of deer and told Joe to stay in the exact spot he was and to be quiet.

After a few minutes, Bob heard a loud scream.

He ran back and asked Joe what had happened.

Joe said “There was this snake and he slithered across my feet, but I never screamed.

Then there was this bear that came up to me and snarled, but I never screamed. ”

“So then what did make you scream,” Bob asked, exasperated.

“Well,” Joe continued, “two squirrels crawled up my pants and I overheard them say,

‘Should we take them home or eat ‘em now?”

________________________________

An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut.

The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?"

"Just water," says the priest.

The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?"

The priest looks at the bottle and says,

"Good Lord! He's done it again!"