finshing the race too soon

LegacyUser

Ive been going out with a girl for the past 2 or 3 months, and its going well except for one thing and basicly stems from the fact im inexperienced at sex. A little bit of background to myself,im 23, ive had a few drunken one night stands in the past but to be honest i didnt enjoy any of them and never came either because of drunkeness or nerves or both.these experiences over time really knocked my confidence and i actually became very negative, resulting in me having a poor opinion of myself and believing i had no chance of any possible success in relationships with women and for a year or so when i was 21-22 i really wasnt bothered. this really hurt, having this low opinion of myself when it came to having sex and relationships because in every other aspect of my life i was a confident person. however over the past 8 or 9 months i really started to see the error of my ways, i was being so negative,focusing on what i didnt want, what i was afraid of, been very afraid of what other people would think etc now i have gradually changed seeing myslef in a positive light and improving my confidence, although it has taken time and im still not fully there, i think im getting there.

Anyway this girl im seeing would be my first proper girlfriend as such,the problem is that weve had sex (or attempts at sex) twice, the first time i was quite nervous and went on the flop, the second time i came after 30 seconds or lol, was quite amusing but at the same time frustrating. My girl doesnt seem to be too arsed with sex, she hasnt put me under any preassure or anything but now i find i am close to blowing my load with minimal contact as in a few strokes of my penis and i am almost about to blow a gasket!I still feel self conscious of what im feeling, if im not feeling near climax point im worrying and thinking negative thoughts (although i have been succeeding in blocking these thoughts out lately) Im not sure what im getting at here, but has anyone any suggestions? ways of overcoming nerves etc? its an aspect of my life im really focusing on trying to improve, i know alot of it has to do with all in the mind, appreciate any positive reponses thanks!

To be honest, just talk about it with your girlfriend. She wont mind, and obviously she's already aware there's an issue.

Practice makes perfect. It's easy to become irrationally terrified when you feel you're not living up to certain expectations. Talk to your girlfriend about trying some calm, substantial(time-wise) foreplay. Explain to her that she's gorgeous and you can't seem to last very long, so it might end up being just foreplay. The more comfortable you become with your body and being intimate with her body, the less worries you'll have. Just explore each other! After time, you wont feel self conscious (hopefully).

I've heard people say that if you masturbate beforehand, you'll last longer during sex. I'm a girl so I don't know if it's true or not, but I wouldn't recommend it. I think it's better to just work it out with your girlfriend.

LegacyUser

you should try to go again and you will last longer second time round.

LegacyUser

If you feel you ejaculate too soon, you should look up Kegel exercises online. This won't delay you from ejaculating, but if you do enough of them, you will be able to send the load back to where it came from before it leave your body.

Look it up anyway and you'll get a better insight.

Lastly, don't be worrying about that happening :-)