Some Confusion!

L.Jenkins

I never thought I'd be considering this, but I need a bit of a sounding board at the moment. I've been reading a book called 'Coming Out - Irish Gay Experiences' and I don't know why I haven't found it sooner as it's positively reassuring to an extent (aswell as throwing the preverbial cat amongst the pigeons).

Now my boggle you ask! Yes I'm Trans and I've drooled over countless women, but while I've enjoyed moments of intimacy with the fairer sex, I fear this is where I experience some of my confusion. Now while I find women attractive, I feel it may be a case of jealousy; Simply looking at a woman and wishing I had her body.

I can't tell if this is part in parcell of who I am or am I gradually coming to terms with my own sexuality aswell? Now I do get abit giddey when it comes to a bit of flirting with my target sex, but I found myself looking at a member of my target gender tonight, thinking how ridiculously attractive she is and then nothing. Not even having the urge to fantasize or chat her up.

I do claim to be bisexual, but I'm feel like I'm sitting on a see-saw that's slowly beginning to tip. I'm just expressing some confusion at the moment and to be honest, I'm not really in a position or head space to go exploring. Anyone have any ideas for person who's experience of things is much like a gyroscope, in a spin and going nowhere as of quickly!

Links234

ItsThatManAgain wrote: »

I'm not really in a position or head space to go exploring.

then don't. you've got enough on your plate with transition, maybe leave exploring until you're in a better place to handle it? nobody says you have to have these things figured out right away, and you're under no pressure to label yourself. so why not just take things one step at a time?

hare05

ITMA, I feel exactly the same. I use the bi label so I don't need to delve deeper into the cause of my attractions. Right now, that would just be confusing.

L.Jenkins

Thanks for the advice I've browsed the forum for quite awhile and still have yet to grasp the concept that sexuality is fluid and it all honesty, it doesn't worry me in the slightest.

I'm curious now and come the day when I can go exploring, I'll go exploring in a non-slutty way of course

Kanoe

exploring.. I do feel as though I've worn nothing but safari gear for the last two years, fought a few dragons and wrestled some lions in some far off jungle but think I know how I feel a little better, I recommend it to anyone.
(all I need is a relaxing holiday to put it all behind me now)

L.Jenkins

Wrestling a few lions, not quite what I had in mind :P Could be fun though

Kanoe

the dragons were so much worse than the lions.. :P
..but I did find someone who validated how I felt, so it was worth it.