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Wednesday Funnies

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  • 02-02-2011 10:30am
    #1
    MonkieSocks
    Registered Users Posts: 8,295 ✭✭✭


    Jamaican Guy called Winston finds an old lamp , polishes it and out pops a genie, who gives Winston one wish.

    He says "I’d like to be White, Slim and surrounded by Pussy”.

    In an instant, there's a puff of smoke and Winston is……………turned into a tampon.


    Moral: If you get offered something for nothing, there's usually a string attached!


    _____________________________

    It's not easy being Dyslexic...

    Last night I got my sleeping tablets and Viagra mixed up................Ended up having Forty ****!

    _____________________________

    I can be so cruel...

    Last night I played Snap with a guy who stutters...
    _____________________________


    A man was very sick and his son went to visit him in the hospital. Suddenly, the father began to breathe heavily and grabbed the pen and pad by the bed.

    With his last ounce of strength he wrote a note, dropped it, and died.

    The son was so overcome with grief that he didn't remember slipping the note into his pocket.

    At the funeral, he reached into the pocket of his coat and immediately felt the note.

    He excitedly read it thinking it might be something he could recite during the service.

    It said:



    You Fookin Twat get off my oxygen pipe!!!

    =(:-) Me? I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude (-:)=



Comments

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    #2
    alandublin15
    Closed Accounts Posts: 169 ✭✭alandublin15


    just want to post two youtube vids that have made me cry with laughter.
    first ones very short, crude and disgusting. (you might be ashamed to laugh)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9fZpqye8Pc

    second ones longer and more for those familiar with ricky gervais and robin ince (but if you are - this one can have you in tears, i almost died laughing)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCTEOcfDjcY


  • Options
    #3
    Enright
    Registered Users Posts: 943 ✭✭✭Enright


    MonkieSocks wrote: »
    Jamaican Guy called Winston finds an old lamp , polishes it and out pops a genie, who gives Winston one wish.

    He says "I’d like to be White, Slim and surrounded by Pussy”.

    In an instant, there's a puff of smoke and Winston is……………turned into a tampon.


    Reminds me of a similiar joke, when the Black man wanted to be:
    White
    Up Tight and
    out of sight
    _____________________________


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