One night stand, what now?

LegacyUser

So, I had a one night stand Saturday nite. I met the guy at a pub, went on to a nite club after (where things started heating up) and then back to his flat....

I've had a couple of one nighters before but always made sure I left (or asked the guy to leave) after the 'act', but this was different ... he was very passionate, great in bed, cared whether I was enjoying myself. I felt comfortable with him, plus it was cold out and late, and didn't fancy being out there looking for a taxi. So I stayed.

Woke up at 5 a.m. and thought again about leaving, but he had his arms around me and I couldn't get out of bed without waking him.

We both woke up at 7 and cuddled a bit, then he asked if he could have me again and I said yes ... then we fell back asleep and woke up at 10.

At this point I had a shower and when I got out he had made us a really nice breakfast, so I stayed for that. Then he phoned me a taxi, walked me out, even opened the taxi door for me. He gave me his phone number on a piece of paper.

So.... I'm confused now as to what to do. I really like him but I don't know that he would want to go out with me now because I already slept with him. But I can't stop thinking about him either....

Corkblowin

Ring the man!!!! He gave you his number - use it! and stop over-analysing!

Hope it all works out

John400

I think it all depends on how he views it.

Although i do think him giving you his number on a bit of paper indicates some interest in you.

stunt_penguin

ONSconfused wrote: »

So.... I'm confused now as to what to do. I really like him but I don't know that he would want to go out with me now because I already slept with him. But I can't stop thinking about him either....

From a a guy's perspective I'm not sure why you might think he wouldn't want to go out with you now. Although you guys have jumped the gun a little, so to speak (and there's little wrong with it)- it's pretty likely that he's interested in more than just sex (yes, men interested in more than sex do exist!).

Plenty of healthy relationships start out like this, and although you'll have to maybe slow it down a tiny bit when you meet again I don't see why you couldn't build a relationship out of it.

kerryman12

Compared to a lot of thread on here about one night stands, sounds like you had a good experiance.

There is no reason to think that he dosent feel/think exactly the same as you at this point.

I don't know that he would want to go out with me now because I already slept with him.

There is no reason to think this, based on your post you would like to go out with him - its just as likely he feels exactly the same.

Give him a call, I hope you get a good outcome.

Best of luck

Katgurl

what is the issue?

if you would like to see him again, phone him up, ask him how his week is going so far & how he is then ask him if he would like to go for a drink closer to the weekend.

its really not that complicated.

boxoff

ONSconfused wrote: »

So, I had a one night stand Saturday nite. I met the guy at a pub, went on to a nite club after (where things started heating up) and then back to his flat....

I've had a couple of one nighters before but always made sure I left (or asked the guy to leave) after the 'act', but this was different ... he was very passionate, great in bed, cared whether I was enjoying myself. I felt comfortable with him, plus it was cold out and late, and didn't fancy being out there looking for a taxi. So I stayed.

Woke up at 5 a.m. and thought again about leaving, but he had his arms around me and I couldn't get out of bed without waking him.

We both woke up at 7 and cuddled a bit, then he asked if he could have me again and I said yes ... then we fell back asleep and woke up at 10.

At this point I had a shower and when I got out he had made us a really nice breakfast, so I stayed for that. Then he phoned me a taxi, walked me out, even opened the taxi door for me. He gave me his phone number on a piece of paper.

So.... I'm confused now as to what to do. I really like him but I don't know that he would want to go out with me now because I already slept with him. But I can't stop thinking about him either....

GO FOR IT! Imagine you'l totally regret it if you don't, you'll always be wondering about him!

dub_3

Well he gave you his number so either he wants a relationship or another one night stand.

From your description he sounds more boyfriend than bootycall type.
So I would say go for it.

In any case if you don't call you'll never know.

Worst case scenario is he only wants the same again, so you get another lovely night and a good breakfast out of it.

If you want to rule out the bootycall scenario, then suggest a daytime meeting, say lunch and an afternoon movie.

If he goes for that, you still have the option of the pub later and back to his place (not yours or you miss the breakfast)

Canluum

This is pretty cut and dry

ONSconfused wrote: »

I don't know that he would want to go out with me now because I already slept with him. But I can't stop thinking about him either....

Only the most immature of twats actually gauge whether they want to see someone again based on whether the person slept with them the first night or not.

Sometimes I've had one nighters that I fully intended to be only one nighters. Only then during the night to change my mind and decide I genuinely like them (one I ended up going out with for quite a while).

spinandscribble

whats the worse that can happen from texting him?

A lot of ONS end in people leaving right after, or else early in the morning. You stayed at his, had a shower, ate breakfast - it sounds like he is interested in you. Pick up a phone, text him and say, "hey, thank you for last night and this morning, it was really sweet"

stunt_penguin

ONSconfused wrote: »

... he was very passionate..... cared whether I was enjoying myself.....

By the way lads and ladies this should be a basic requirement from any man.

King of Kings

stunt_penguin wrote: »

By the way lads and ladies this should be a basic requirement from any man.

Thanks. I've been waiting all my life for somebody to tell me that. If only you'd told me that 10 years ago :rolleyes:

LegacyUser

OP, keep in mind, "one night stand" is a pretty vague term, and it's usually used in retrospect. I wouldn't get too hung up on thinking of this encounter as one - unless that's what you want it to be, and it sounds like you don't. By my definition of the term anyway, sleeping with someone the first time you meet them doesn't signify that it's a one night stand. I've gone out with some folks that I slept with the first time I met them, and likewise I've slept with folks the first time I met them and never seen them again. Can go either way.

In this case, sounds like you folks had a good time together, weren't exactly in a hurry to escape each other's company, and swapped contact details. Assuming you're interested, then yeah, definitely don't throw this one away on the basis of how you think it's supposed to fit together. Contact the chap again and see where it goes - may well be nowhere, but then again may not be. If it goes nowhere because one of you isn't interested, them's the breaks. If it goes nowhere because you slept with the chap the first time you met him, then he's probably a bad idea anyway and you dodged a bullet, no loss. If it goes nowhere because you didn't try, well, that'd be a pity. Go for it.

Ickle Magoo

stunt penguin & King of Kings infracted for off-topic and unhelpful posting.

Please keep replies on topic and helpful to the OP.

Be aware that off-topic and unhelpful posting can earn you a ban from this forum.

Please take the time to read the forum rules in the charter and abide by them.

Many thanks.
Ickle

stunt_penguin

Oops, sorry, haven't been on the forum for long;

The OP sounds like she's found a nice guy (and might not have in the past) so it was meant as a sort of indirect encouragement, didn't mean to go off-topic.

ongarboy

yes, it's too early to label this encounter as a one night stand unless you can look back in the past and say that all it was as nothing else ever came of it. The fact he gave you his number is a step in the right direction that he is interested in more.


I met my other half at a club and ended up spending the night together and it could have been classified as a ONS if nothing more happened as had been the case with previous such encounters I had. He gave me his number. I hummed and hawed about timing of getting in touch (didn't want to do it too soon for fear of being too eager) but bit the bullet 3 days later to ask him if he'd like to meet up for a drink. 6 years later, we are still together. Valentine's Day is our anniversary xxx

I'm not saying this is how it will work out for you but don't throw away the opportunity to at least give it a go if you like him! Best of luck.