niggly feelings

LegacyUser

Just looking for other peoples perspectives,

6 months out of a serious 4 year relationship, and now seeing a great guy for the past couple of months, offical about two weeks.

I know I'm completely over the 4 year relationship, I'm actually a much happier and outgoing person since it's over which I didn't expect! The thing is I really like this new guy a lot, but I find myself having niggly little thoughts going around in the back of my head. He does text me everyday but I usually only see him once a week and he never calls which I find strange at this stage.

I initiated contact and I brought up the "seeing other people or not" talk, he is kind of shy so maybe it's just that? He seems happier not talking about past relationships too because I was edging around it one night and he just changed the subject. The thing is I know he likes me because he keeps telling me and he's always mad to call in he just works long hours, and he's already introduced me to everyone!

I suppose I'm asking if anyone has any experience with this sort of thing? Is it just harder starting a new relationship when you're use to a serious one???

MiniSquish

I can completely relate to what you're saying. I'm going out with someone for a year now and I was in a previous relationship that was serious too. The new guy never calls me, I am mostly the first to initiate contact and we only see each other about once a week too. With the ex we talked every night on the phone, saw each other a few times a week etc. I think with my boyfriend he's just not used to the kind of relationship that I want and maybe that's the same with your guy. Maybe you should tell him that you want to see him more than once a week and would appreciate a phonecall once in a while. It's difficult to start a new relationship especially when you're used to things being the way they were in the previous one.

LegacyUser

Thanks MiniSquish! I'm glad it's not just me!

The thing is he does initiate contact most of the time, and he seems to plan on sticking around but maybe it is like you say and I'm just use to things being a certain way, and now I need to get use to this!!

I wish we got to see each other more but we live about 50min drive apart and he works very long hours usually until quite late at night. I think I usually work things up in my head because you can read a text in so many ways.

MiniSquish

At the moment myself and the boyfriend are disagreeing over me always having to make contact so no you are definitely not the only one. I guess we'll just have to ease them into making the effort too