Dogs and Children: advice please

i-digress

I am really excited about 2011 for many reasons, but one of the main reasons is because myself and my husband are going to be foster parents

Which means my chocolate labrador is going to be a foster pet! She'll be one in March.

I love Roxie loads. When I got her I was struggling with my fibromyalgia and depression. When I got her, I couldn't stay in bed when I felt sick. She was a puppy, and needed training and companionship. She gave me a reason to get out of bed and a structure for my day. I'm coping better these days largely due to her. She keeps me company during the day. She can read me really well. When I'm having a good day she'll wander on her walk and run away from me and back. When I'm having a bad day she knows, and will only walk so far in front of me before she stops, and looks back at me anxiously till I catch up.

We're very close. I treat her like a dog though, she definitely knows her place.

Obviously, Roxie's place will be below any foster child. She accepts that and is super gentle and good with kids (though she still has some puppy bounce!)

Just wondering, is there anyway to make this less stressful on her and happy for all concerned? I'm hoping to start her on agility, so that'll be some time I'll spend with just me and her, plus walks...I'm just wondering if people have any tips, especially as I'll be fostering kids from 0 to six years of age.

All advice welcome

Cherry Blossom

Have you any nieces/nephews or friends with kids that could have the occasional sleep over to get her used to the idea of kids sleeping in her house? I don't think she should have any problems though, except maybe like the rest of you - when they they have to leave

I wish you the absolute best of luck with this adventure

ISDW

I have fostered children for over 12 years and I would say to be careful with her around any new children. Sometimes very damaged children will try and hurt animals to hurt the foster family, so until you are totally sure about a child, make sure they don't have the opportunity to hurt her.

However, I have found that dogs have had a huge impact on the children. I had one 11 year old girl move in with us, when they rang the doorbell and the dogs barked, she didn't want to come into the house, she was petrified of dogs. Within a few weeks, she could come home from school and lie on the settee with one of the dogs, telling her all about her school day. I would often find her asleep with her arms around the dog, I guess she couldn't trust people, but realised the dog would just accept her. So I think that animals in foster homes are fantastic. Social workers don't always agree, so be aware that they may question the interaction between the child and the animal.

i-digress

Although I'm 24 my siblings range from 1-13. Roxie loves them all, especially the 1 year old, and not just because he drops biscuit crumbs on the floor :rolleyes:. She spent Christmas with them, sleeping over, while I went to my in-laws where my brother in law suffers from allergies, and she was fine.

i-digress

ISDW wrote: »

Sometimes very damaged children will try and hurt animals to hurt the foster family, so until you are totally sure about a child, make sure they don't have the opportunity to hurt her.

Never even thought of this, but obviously that could happen! Thanks for the heads up.

ISDW wrote: »

Social workers don't always agree, so be aware that they may question the interaction between the child and the animal.

Yeah, I already sense a bit of wariness there. I wonder if she was a yellow lab and more Andrex-puppy like if they'd be as worried :rolleyes:

TooManyDogs

I don't know what age your foster child will be but when I was preparing for our baby I really brushed up on their basic obedience, basic things like 'sit', 'wait', 'stay' and 'leave it' in particular. I also did quite a bit of work on their lead manners so I could easily walk a buggy with them all. I re-inforced that they weren't allowed upstairs and on the sofa without invitation and weren't to rush past me through doors. Also that they have to walk calmly while inside the house.
I taught them not to grab food dropped on the floor or not to touch toys not belonging to them that were on the floor so that there would be no accidental injuries if both baby and dog went for the same thing. I'd say that any of the above could still be relevant to having any child no matter what age they are.
One thing I've noticed is that if there is anything different about the child by way of disability, no matter how slight, your dog will pick up on it straight away. Some dogs don't care, some take extra special care of that child but some can get a bit freaked out so that may be something you need to be aware of. In particular if there's any balance issues where their gait is not quite 100% it can upset some dogs, again most dogs either don't care or are extra patient.

Very best of luck!

kildareash

I think it would be important to keep your dog's routine as normal as possible when your foster child arrives.
Obviously, they will be your no 1 priority, but don't shut the dog out so to speak. You wouldn't want the dog to become jealous of the new person in your life.
Sounds like your dog has already been around children, which is a good start.

It could be a very positive interaction for the child to have the companionship of the dog.

I know there is a new charity which was set up last year to train dogs to become companions for children with autism. Primarily, the reason for the dog is for the child's safety - to stop them bolting off, but also in time they hope that the dog will help with the child's socialisation.

It's going to be a learning curve for everyone in the house.

Good luck with everything, hope it all works out for you x