Debs question???

LegacyUser

Hi, been here a while but decided to go unreg this time.

I've decided I know the girl that I plan to bring to my Debs in september.

What bothers me at the moment is how should I go about doing it? I know one of her childhood friends will probably be going because she's going out with a lad in my year.

I'm afraid if I ask this girl she will ask who else is going and I won't have a clue. Just saying I haven't asked anyone in my year if they have Debs dates because I don't want to be nosey.

Just for anyone that might suggest I've decided its not too early to ask because I'm good friends with this girl and I would rather bring her than a randomer. That's why I've decided not to try get a girlfriend over the next few months.

If someone asks her before me that won't affect me too much because I've decided I will ask one of her friends if she tells me "I've already been asked". That might be even better because then she will definitely have a friend there, and you end up just being with friends anyway.

Also I'm in an all-boys school so I rarely get to see her. This is why I plan to ask the next time we meet.

Finally it comes to my mind everyday. So would it be better to forget about it altogether and just pop the question the next time I'm in a lengthy conversation with the girl because I don't want this to be on my mind until I see her again.

John400

OP, you've stated there that you're good friends with the girl that you want to ask to your debs, so i'm guessing that she won't be offended if you ask her to it.

If it's the case that somebody has already asked her it's unfortunate for you, but the only way you can stop wondering about it is to ask her. You'll most probably have to bite the bullet on this one.

As i said she's not going to be disgusted with you for asking her out and never speak to you again.!

The only thing stopping you is worrying about your ego being dented if she's already going with someone else. You've got to ask.

SirDelboy18

She'll be flattered and likely agree if she hasn't been invited yet. Which I highly doubt. I asked mine in June I think and I was among the earliest that year.

So I highly doubt people will have anyone asked.

MitchKoobski

I asked mine in March, the debs were in August. She was a good friend of mine, and I also would have rathered bringing her than some random girl I barely knew.
Just go for it next time you're talking to her and get it off your mind!

LegacyUser

Thanks all.

As I've said I will ask one of her friends if she was already asked.

I'm just worried about the awkwardness of not knowing whether any of her friends are going or not.

But I will try the next time I see her, I've decided to rule out calling the girl because I think she would prefer if I did it face-to-face.

LegacyUser

Thanks all.

As I've said I will ask one of the girl's friends if someone already asked her to the debs.

What really worries me is the awkwardness of not knowing whether any of her friends are going.

But yeah, I will try the next time I see her. I decided to rule out making a phone call because she would prefer if I did it face-to-face.

discus

Mate, don't bother asking around to see if she's taken. Just ask her yourself - it's far more masculine to go straight to it. If you get rejected, so be it. And, you might get the wrong info if you don't ask her directly!

mariebeth

unreg question wrote: »

I'm just worried about the awkwardness of not knowing whether any of her friends are going or not.

One of her friends will be going...you!

So don't worry, just ask her.

John400

discus wrote: »

Mate, don't bother asking around to see if she's taken. Just ask her yourself - it's far more masculine to go straight to it. If you get rejected, so be it. And, you might get the wrong info if you don't ask her directly!

I agree.

First off, you have to ask her face-to-face, and when you're alone with her.

If the two of you are alone then she can say yes or no and it's just between the two of you. As i said, she will not be offended if you ask her straight out.

If you ask her friends about her then you are putting yourself at risk of embarassment and of gossip.

discus

Yeah, it would be far worse for her to hear "Oh, X was asking everyone if you're available for the debs". Some girls will make drama out of everything too mate.

I don't think he says anywhere that this girl is going out with anyone, what he did say is that the girl he wants to ask's friend is going out with someone in his year, so this girl will likely be at it.

Just ask her - the worst is she says no, then you can ask somebody else.

LegacyUser

Deleted User wrote: »

I don't think he says anywhere that this girl is going out with anyone, what he did say is that the girl he wants to ask's friend is going out with someone in his year, so this girl will likely be at it.

Just ask her - the worst is she says no, then you can ask somebody else.

Yes I didn't say anything about a relationship, she is single.

But the point I think everyone is missing is that I'm "just" friends with this girl and I want to ask her to my debs NOT out on a "date".

Right now I need to stop thinking about it and let the question come to my mind the next time I see her.