Peep show quotes thread

thenutflush

I propose that a quotes thread exists to celebrate this truly brilliant show

Mark: "It's only through the miracle of consumer capitalism that you're not lying in your own shit, dying at 43 with rotten teeth, and a little tablet with a picture of a chicken on it isn't going to change that."

Jeremy: (in head): "It's like a moral dilemma.. except it's not, because no-one else will know.."

amacachi

Tell ya what, that crack is VERY moreish.

thenutflush

Superhans: Nice packet of Crunchy Nut you got here. Pretty expensive, as I recall.
[dumps cereal on floor]

Creamy Goodness

Mark: socks before or after trousers, but never before pants. Thats the rule It makes a man look scary like a chicken.

Jez: crunchy nut cornflakes are just frosties for ****.
Mark: well frosties are just cornflakes for people who can't face reality.

Mark: if I'm a branflake then he's a slutty sugar puff.


Mark: While we’re at it, there are systems for a reason in this world. Economic stability, interest rates, growth. It’s not all a conspiracy to keep you in little boxes, alright? It’s only the miracle of consumer capitalism that means you’re not lying in your own ****, dying at 43 with rotten teeth. And a little pill with a chicken on it is not going to change that. Now come on... **** off.

Lollers

PIPE

thenutflush

"That's MY bit of lager"

"A sausage Jeremy, a sausage is missing"

Minstrel27

From this weeks episode. I nearly fell out of my bed laughing at it.


Random guy at party to Jeremy: Is there any more tartar sauce?

Jeremy: Oh, I'm sorry, I left it all in George Osbourne's ball sack. Tell you what, why don't you nip upstairs, **** him off and dip it in that?

dagdha

Awesome show!

I was going to quote this but I would'nt be able to do it justice, when I seen this clip I burst my hole laughing. The face that Super Hans makes is priceless.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Mdazf0CUOY

Gingy

Girl at bar: "Can I have a metre of vodka with an inch of tonic.."

(Mark; C'mon Mark, turn it on play the game)
Mark: "Oh, naughty, you've combined metric and imperial..you might get an interdenominational hangover that way"...brilliant

the keen edge

The secret ingredient is crime.

the keen edge

amacachi wrote: »

Tell ya what, that crack is VERY moreish.

Relax, this isn't Blue Peter.

RayM

"There's the familar gut punch of Pain and Loneliness. Hello, old friend."

Magic Eight Ball

'**** off clean shirt!'

KeanSeenan

Don't **** on my dreams, I don't want **** on my dreams.

Mardy Bum

This is what you want!

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Peep_Show

ashyle

"This is BULL****" *Super Hans kicks bathroom door in*

Superbus

"Is that... normal pooing you're doing?"

"(in head) Relax Mark, you're not actually at Yalta."

etchyed

"Mark, do you have to live quite so relentlessly in the real world?"

ashyle

Jeremy: There's only so much happiness in the world, and they're hoarding it all!
Mark: Jez, that isn't how happiness works... (It completely is)