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falling in love

  • 28-12-2010 6:38pm
    #1
    gillian1983
    Closed Accounts Posts: 58 ✭✭


    so how do you know when you're in love with someone or falling in love with someone? if you're thinking about the person constantly and want to be around them all the time, does this mean you're in love with them?
    i'm talking about 2 friends who have never had a physical relationship or kissed before.. thanks


Comments

  • #2
    Ickle Magoo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    Is this a personal issue for you gillian1983? Are you wondering if you are in love? If it's a more generalised question then it's better posed in a more suitable forum.


  • #3
    gillian1983
    Closed Accounts Posts: 58 ✭✭gillian1983


    i suppose it is a bit personal. ive been friends with a guy i work with for the past few months. i know he fancied me but he says he thinks of me all the time and just wants to be with me every second.
    he said in a text about a month ago that he loves me but since then he hasnt said he does. he knows i have a bf so hes trying to keep his distance. i really like him as a friend but he says he cant just be my friend. he wants to cut contact for good because he says its very hard to think of me with my bf.
    i suppose im just wondering is he genuinely in love with me or just fancies me?
    i know hes very inexperienced and has never had a gf before..
    any advice appreciated


  • #4
    Ickle Magoo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    He can't possibly be in love with you because he barely knows you - and given the relationship issues you are having at the moment, I think you'd be better off concentrating on what you want than what other people want or mean.

    All the best


  • #5
    curlzy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,708 ✭✭✭curlzy


    Do you realize how disloyal you are being to your boyfriend by having this type of "friend"? How would you feel if your boyfriend had the same kinda relationship with a co-worker? Either finish it with your boyfriend or cut contact with this guy. You're on a slippery slope here and you're not behaving very well. Are you just enjoying the drama and "woe-is-me does he love me?" type thing??? Are you still a teenager? If you are it's understandable, still a ****ty way to behave on your BF but if you're older than 19 then you really need to have a long hard look at yourself. To have a wonderful relationship you need to be a wonderful partner so have a good look at yourself and how you're behaving.


  • #6
    gillian1983
    Closed Accounts Posts: 58 ✭✭gillian1983


    i am 27! and the guy in question is 27. i dont think i am being disloyal.
    i have been with my BF since we were both 19 and have only kissed one other guy. i love my Bf to bits and dont want anything meaningful with the friend. i just enjoy the ego boost of him loving me.
    i love my BF but in order to continue happily with him, i need to kiss another guy and i think this guy could be a good option.
    i dont have feelings for the other guy so would just like to have kissed a guy who loved me.
    i dont even fancy him but i suppose the way he really likes me so much makes me wanna just kiss him. it would be a once off and then id be happy.
    but i dont want to kiss him if he isnt in love with me. so i need to find out for sure?


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  • #7
    gillian1983
    Closed Accounts Posts: 58 ✭✭gillian1983


    just to update-
    i am almost 28 and am starting to feel like i havent enjoyed enough guys. i am going to get old and wrinkly in 2 years time so i want to score some guys before that happens. then i will happily settle. i am not breaking up with my BF as i feel what he wont know wont hurt him. all i want is a kiss from a guy..


  • #8
    Webmonkey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,579 ✭✭✭Webmonkey


    I cannot believe what I'm reading. Will you do your BF a favor and let him know and let him find someone he deserves. Then you can 'score' guys that 'love' you all you want.


  • #9
    Wompa1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,193 ✭✭✭Wompa1


    gillian1983 wrote: »
    just to update-
    i am almost 28 and am starting to feel like i havent enjoyed enough guys. i am going to get old and wrinkly in 2 years time so i want to score some guys before that happens. then i will happily settle. i am not breaking up with my BF as i feel what he wont know wont hurt him. all i want is a kiss from a guy..

    Woah!! Talk about taking a massive slide there!! Do your bf a favour and break up with him. Jesus, I can get the idea that you think you haven't sowed your wild oats but thinking you can go off and do it and still be in a relationship is down right disgusting.

    Did your bf cheat on you or something? Even if he did if you want to play away then you need to break up with him or suggest a break even. Your b/f should have say in the situation. Maybe he wouldn't mind getting some strange himself!


  • #10
    Firetrap
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,442 ✭✭✭Firetrap


    OP, seeing as you started another thread here the other day regarding your boyfriend kissing another girl at a work do, I think it's time the two of you sat down and had a long chat about where your relationship is or isn't going. Two wrongs don't make a right. Is kissing this guy really going to be just an itch to scratch or are you looking for revenge?


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