Career not in line with my values...?

shergal_farkey

Hi all,

Just throwing this out there to see what comes back...'a la boomerang' effect:

I have career-changed a couple of times and now work as an accountant. Growing up, I (think!) I was interested in creative pursuits (writing, the arts etc.) and spirituality and I have basically found myself having an existential crisis for years now where I find that I seem to have very little in common with those around me (never/rarely seem to meet people I click with in my line of work).

I often wonder if my difficulty in meeting like-minded people is to do with working in a field that I find brings me no joy/satisfaction (albeit I am proud of my achievements and the work that I put in).

I am now thinking about training as a counsellor with the hope and intention of finding more sincere and meaningful contact with people as I feel drained by my office life and feel sad that seems to be impossible to meet proper friends through my work. I consider myself to a person who has a lot of empathy for others and this type of work now seems to appeal to me for this reason (I think...).

Just wondering if anyone else has experienced anything similar? I avoided creative pursuits because I found them to be a little self-indulgent and that didn't feel quite right as a career either - not sure if I would have found my happiness there.

I have found most of my working life unsatisfying and I feel that I am not contributing to the world in the positive way that I would like to and I feel that my working relationships are very shallow and that I am not growing as an individual. I spend a lot of time thinking about this...

Can anyone else relate?

Odysseus

I would have little time for the concept of empathy tbh; however as this is a quality you identify as strong within you, can I ask how you think this will make your new choice of career a more suitable choice?

By all means change you career if you find yourself in a position whereby apart from the financial side if it; your current position offers very little. Can I ask how you decided on counselling as a career?

shergal_farkey

You have little time for the concept of empathy? Really?

Odysseus

shergal_farkey wrote: »

You have little time for the concept of empathy? Really?

Yeah some would see it as one of the core conditions, but within the way I work I would have little time for it, note I did not say no time for it. There is a difference, but you haven't answered any of my questions as they more people know the more people will be able to respond to your question. Though it is often slow around here over the weekend, and it looks like Christmas is the same, so give you thread a bit of time and you will get other responses.

shergal_farkey

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krankykitty

I'm wondering if your desire to meet like minded people might not be served by following a hobby or interest that will lead you to meeting such people, maybe joining a club or association? I personally don't think that's greatly self indulgent, and it can be an outlet to make your working life that bit more bearable.

As Odysseus mentioned, perhaps it might help if you could speak a little about how you came to become interested in counselling as a way out of your dilemma?

A word of warning about going into a career in counselling as a way of meeting like minded people - you will probably certainly meet people with similar interests or philosophies in your training course, that you can strike up friendships with. However, in your working life as a counsellor, however unless you end up working for an organisation where you have loads of colleagues, (a lot of people do private practice which for the most part is working alone), you might find counselling as a career to be quite isolating, unless you go out of your way to get involved with associations etc. That's what my perception is (although I am very new to the field).

shergal_farkey

Hi KK,

I have worked in many large organisations and have felt quite isolated there too, so for me, there is no issue on that front. I don't see the point in being in a job where you are surrounded by people but where the corporate mentality makes it difficult to build proper relationships with people. I find many of these places to be quite toxic and stifling.

I thought about counselling because I have had my own difficulties in life and think I have enough insight to be able to apply my knowledge and experience to others. Also, I believe myself to be a non-judgmental person who cares about the well-being of others and who can deal with the difficult emotions of others.

I find myself to be generally quite interested in people.

krankykitty

Hi Shergal,

Perhaps it is simply the particular organisations you are working for - I have worked in various corporate environments where there didn't seem to be such barriers towards making friends with people. You could be unlucky with the places you have been working in. Also, as you've career changed into a line of work very different to where your interests lie, perhaps it's just too different? I wonder if there's any career that could join your interests/talents and qualifications, even if it's just as a stop gap?

I know you are saying you'd be OK with feeling isolated if you were working as a counsellor, but this contradicts what I think I am understanding from your first post you really want to be able to make a connection with the people around you in your job. In counselling, yes, you will usually make a working connection with your clients however it's vastly different to having colleagues that you can be friendly with (and rightly so).

Youre dead right to be considering all this so carefully before making a decision, it's a long and hard road into such a career.

shergal_farkey

Thanks for that. It's not just the making friends through work thing though - I don't feel any sense of pride/contentment through my work - it is pretty meaningless to me to be honest with you and I want to do something that I can feel I have made a worthwhile and positive contribution towards.

shergal_farkey

I possibly did not express this discontentment with my line of work in my original post. I am looking for more meaning in my work.

krankykitty

I know what you mean. That was where I was coming from with the suggestion of having an interest outside of work that would give you some of the fulfillment (while still allowing you to pay the bills!). I was in a similar position myself at one time and I began doing some voluntary work in an area I was interested in in my spare time. It certainly helped to make work more bearable, as I felt I was making a contribution in my spare time.

Perhaps you could look into some other caring/helping professions as well, that might give you the sense of satisfaction you're looking for too?

If you do decide to go down the counselling route, do post back here if you have any questions about training etc..

shergal_farkey

I honestly feel like I have been trying to bury how I feel about what I am doing with my professional life for a long time - I feel like a fish out of water, so I think my mind is already made up.

krankykitty

Best of luck with your new endeavours. It can feel great to just make the decision to make the change and I wish you all the best with it. It might be helpful to talk to some kind of career guidance person also? Or indeed there might be stuff on the web about finding a career thats right for you.

Let us know if you have any specific questions about the counselling, psychology or psychiatry careers - there's many posters on here with experience in various careers that I'm sure would be able to answer your queries.

shergal_farkey

Are you in this line of work yourself KK?? And if so, do you enjoy it?

krankykitty

I recently graduated from counselling and psychotherapy degree and am doing a limited bit of work on a part time basis. i still have my full time job in a completely unrelated field. I am working towards the requirements for accreditation with some of the various organisations...

I do enjoy the work and it's something you'll never stop learning more about as time goes on, once you've an interest in it. However, I'm not sure if I'd ever get to a point where I'd want to do it full time, unless I was working in an organisation such as the HSE or other agency. Its tough out there in private practice from what I hear.

Odysseus

krankykitty wrote: »

I do enjoy the work and it's something you'll never stop learning more about as time goes on, once you've an interest in it. However, I'm not sure if I'd ever get to a point where I'd want to do it full time, unless I was working in an organisation such as the HSE or other agency. Its tough out there in private practice from what I hear.

It can be even more difficult within the HSE than private practice believe me, you have the ethics of the organisation which may run in a different way than your therapeutic work. Whereas with private practice it's about having enough clients to pay your fees.

krankykitty

I can imagine Odysseus, I've seen that myself in the small agencies that I've worked in so far, I've had to reconcile my own ideas/practices from rules that the organisation brings in etc. and these places would be much smaller than the HSe which I'm sure has a lot of red tape and bureacracy?

A regular wage is a benefit all right, as (for me) would be having colleagues.. Suppose it's a balancing act really.

kitkat.3b4t

shergal_farkey wrote: »

I have career-changed a couple of times and now work as an accountant. Growing up, I (think!) I was interested in creative pursuits (writing, the arts etc.) and spirituality and I have basically found myself having an existential crisis for years now where I find that I seem to have very little in common with those around me (never/rarely seem to meet people I click with in my line of work).

Hi Shergal

You seem to have made up your mind that accounting is no longer for you. You say that you have changed your career a few times. Maybe if you think about what you liked and didnt like about these other jobs it will help you decide on what you are looking for in a new career.

You say that you are interested in the arts. I come from an artistic background and would say that a creative mind is probably a bonus when it comes to solving problems and doing assignments etc. However unless you go down one of the arts therapy routes eg drama, art etc, you wont get an opportunity to use your artistic leanings much.

I have been in private practice for over a year. I would have liked to persue one of the more new age therapies mentioned above but there is very little prospects of employment by way of HSE or other organizations and I imagine that private practice in this field would be harder to establish than more traditional modes of counselling.

I would be cautious about expecting a career in counselling to bring about a fundemental change in ones life. However studying psychology is very interesting and it has certainly changed the way I think about relationships with others and my place in the world.

Being a counsellor can be very challanging and I would say empathy helps. However as a counsellor you learn a particular method and technique so it is very dirrerent from giving advice to a friend. If you choose a career as a counsellor you will more than likley end up specializing in one particular discipline eg psychodynamic, CBT. humanistic and you will learn the philosophy and methods of that discipline.

If you are looking to make friends possibly interests or hobbies might be a good start. If after your studies you end up it private practice, you could find yourself quite isolated and its always a good idea to have interests outside of work. There also might be a little bit of competition between those in private practice, so dont be too suprised if you find some of the characterastics/ personality types, which you appear to be trying to move away from, also present amongst counsellors/psychotherapists.

I hope I havent said anything too negative. Studying psychology and counselling is a marvelous way to further personal development and to meet interesting, insightful people, so good luck!!

JuliusCaesar

The scientific study of psychology is the study of the normal. You won't get much insight into yourself, unless you consider stuff like knowing what area of your brain does what, how information is processed, what makes us feel the sensation we regard as "hunger".

I loved it myself, but "personal development"? (What is "personal development"?)

shergal_farkey

Are you asking me JC?

kitkat.3b4t

JuliusCaesar wrote: »

The scientific study of psychology is the study of the normal. You won't get much insight into yourself, unless you consider stuff like knowing what area of your brain does what, how information is processed, what makes us feel the sensation we regard as "hunger".

I loved it myself, but "personal development"? (What is "personal development"?)

Julius, I dont know how long ago you studied psychology, but I think you have a fairly norrow view of the subject as it is taught. Sensation, perception and information processing are certainly a part of the curriculum, but social psychology is also well covered. This includes a study of what it means to be both an individual and part of society. Consciousness is studied form both an information processing and phenomenological point of view. I havent got time to go through the full curriculum but its certainly more varied and stimulating than merely information processing.