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Missed out on my formative years?/Lack of confidence

  • 06-12-2010 1:47am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Hey everyone, I find it weird writing this down but probably needs to be done. I'm just wondering to myself, have I lost out?

    Here's my story, met my first, and only girlfriend when I was 16. We were together until I was 22, living together for 4 years. When we were together, I was really discouraged from talking to other girls, and she'd get very jealous. In a way this ruined my college life as I never went out with college friends, and to be honest didn't make many. I lost touch with friends, mostly the female ones. I didn't see what I was doing until we broke up after she cheated on me.

    I'm now 25, and haven't had a girlfriend since, not even a kiss, or even a hug. I don't seem to have that knack that guys have for chatting up girls.

    I'm a decent looking lad, pretty fit and always get told how nice I am. But I feel like because I was in a relationship from 16-22, I missed out on the timeframe when most people "get their practice in" with regards to social interaction.

    Not that I'm a fan of chatting up in clubs, but even in a regular day to day scenario, if I'm talking to a single girl, I get all awkward and lost for words, along with saying stupid stuff!
    However, I feel totally comfortable chatting to a girl who has a boyfriend!! It's like a feel less pressure talking to them as I'm not thinking in my head "oh she's nice, wouldn't mind getting to know her better"!

    I feel like my experience with my ex has made a bit of a mess of me socially. Any advice on how to get over this? I often wish i worked somewhere bigger with more scope for interaction with the fairer sex, and I've tried clubs/hobbies/evening courses etc. I've grown to enjoy my own company, pursue things I've always wanted to do and feel like I'm a cool, smart decent looking guy.....who just can't catch a break with women! I'd love nothing more than an ould cuddle sometimes!

    Reading back I'm not sure why I'm posting here, I guess just to let out some feelings.


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