how to say im not interested

LegacyUser

The background, met a girl one night out, having a few kisses and swapped numbers.
Met up since twice for a few dates I wanted to give her a chance but thing is im not really that attracted to her and she seems pretty keen on me.
Whats the easiest way to let someone know your not interested. How you do even bring it up? Just slip it into conversation?

Im terrible at these sort of things and would prefer to be honest and not just ignore her
text/calls etc...

JimmyCrackCorn

Just be honest. Your a good person but im afriad its not going to work out and i dont want to lead you on ...................... Sorry dont want to upset you .............

Simple. The longer you leave it the worse it will be.

thebiggestjim

Call her, tell her you think she is a nice girl but you dont see this going any further. Calling is important, its not the easiest thing to do but its the right thing to do. You will have done the correct thing and she wont be wondering why your making all these excuses why you can't hang out with her. I believe she will appreciate that you were up front and honest with her.

whatsamsn

It all comes down to what type of person you are op

Some people tend to just ignore. Which is a cowardly way of letting someone get the picture.
Others have decency and just let the person know. Usually by the lines "we didnt click/gel" etc. Yes they are cliche lines but they all mean the same thing ... "Im not that into you"... its just a nice way of putting it.


Op, there is no harm in sending a text. In these matters, who wants to ask someone to meet only for a small conversation of how things are. By letting a person know, albeit through text, you are still doing the decent thing and letting them know.

Uugh, horrible situation. just do your best to be honest with her. ignoring her would only make things worse because she won't know where she stands.

lady_jane_grey

Would definitely agree with graphy there. Definitely let her know what the deal is. I've been that girl waiting to hear from someone who wasn't interested and it was awful. You sound like a decent person, as you're actually thinking of what to say to her, rather than taking the ignoring route. There is no easy way of saying it really. But do say it. Or text it. Either way, let her know.

wylo

I dont think a call is even necessary, a text is fine imo. Personally if I was hearing that news Id prefer a text cause then they dont have to sitting there on the phone awkwardly waiting for some reaction.

Fair play for letting her know. Years ago I just did the ignore thing and I still regret it, I cringe thinking about it, its just cowardly and unfair.

valleyoftheunos

Its hard to know really, I was in a similar situation once and decided to give her a call as I felt it was the decent thing to do. she berated me not for why I'd called but for calling her at all, apparently a Text would have been much better instead of disturbing her with a call!

Maybe a text is the best thing, you haven't been seeing each other for long or seriously, it saves possible embarrassment on everyone's behalf and is still way better than just ignoring her.

SparkyTech

whattodo5 wrote: »

The background, met a girl one night out, having a few kisses and swapped numbers.
Met up since twice for a few dates I wanted to give her a chance but thing is im not really that attracted to her and she seems pretty keen on me.
Whats the easiest way to let someone know your not interested. How you do even bring it up? Just slip it into conversation?

Im terrible at these sort of things and would prefer to be honest and not just ignore her
text/calls etc...

Be honest. Ring her up and explain how you think she's a lovley person but you didn't feel ye practicualry clicked very well/the sparks not there. Ignoring her isn't fair and it leaes the other person in a loop as to what your feeling/thinking

Best of luck.

Kiera

I had to do it a while ago and took the cowards way out and told him i was getting back with my ex It worked tho!

Novella

You don't even need to bring it up in conversation, nor do you need to ignore her. Just ease off on the communication, don't do any of the 'I really like you' stuff and she'll see that it's not going anywhere and get the hint.

Ignoring her would be kinda mean, imo. It could leave her wondering if she did something wrong etc., and that's a bit unfair. Whereas if you just let things die down naturally, taper off or whatever, no one really gets hurt so it's all win win.

weatherguy

Don't ignore her and don't text her. Both are cowardly.
Ring her and tell her.
She will be hurt if she is really into you, but in time she will also respect you for having done the decent thing by calling her.
Ignoring her and making excuses why you can't meet her is cowardly. It is something that teenagers do. It shows you up as a wimp not a MAN.
Texting her with the news is equally bad. Again, in my opinion, it is a cowardly thing to do. You aren't talking to her simply texting her and it is an awful thing to do.

Call her.

LegacyUser

just tell her you'd like to be friends but you couldn't see it developing into a relationship because the spark isn't there, you don't have butterflies in your tummy !!
Don't text, call her!

solovely

If you are not in the habit of calling her, if you normally chat by text, then I think text is enough. It's a bit patronising and humiliating to get a call when you are not actually going out with the guy (in my opinion).

Definitely better to be honest though. 90% of people would just go down the ignore route, which is really unfair.

Say something like, I've had a lovely few nights out with you, but to be honest, I'm not really interested in taking this further at the moment. You're not her boyfriend so no need to be all patronising and say you're really sorry if you've hurt her and she's a lovely girl and all that nonsense!