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what is a boy to do?

  • 27-11-2010 10:55pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi,

    Been with my girlfriend a couple of years now.
    I've always had a wandering eye - I feel like my eyes and thoughts wander a bit more than the average guy.
    I've never done anything about it - and I would hope I never would - the thought of me hurting her like that kills me!

    Thet thing is, I always have some other girl I'm thinking about. It might be a girl in work or that I know from some other setting or even one of her friends!

    What seems to happen is I think about the other girl for a few weeks or a couple of months - then the attraction just seems to die away - but it will start up again with someone else a bit later.
    I think I miss the fun, exciting, early part of relationships.

    My girlfriend is a great girl, generally we get on really well and by nearly every indicator (except this!) have a really good relationship.
    I'm just wondering if I am doing the right thing by going out with her - is it normal to have these feellings? Or is a sign that I am just not ready for a steady relationship?

    Any advise would be much appreciated.
    Thanks


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 170 ✭✭carmel27


    Hi OP
    I dont think you're doing anything wrong, as long as you dont act on these crushes. Its only normal to look at other women. It'd be strange if you didnt look, but as long as you're only looking. And as you said, these crushes die away after a while so its not like you've had a long term obsession with just one particular person.
    I wouldnt worry about it:)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 189 ✭✭Canluum


    What you're feeling is pretty normal. A relationship is a choice, monogamy isn't a wholly natural state.

    For you it more or less comes down to this, which do you want to do more?

    1) Settle down with your current girlfriend, have a few kids etc.

    2) Sow your wild oats while you still can.


    The second choice you obligate you breaking up with your girlfriend, obviously. You can't put her on hold or anything either. If you don't really see yourself marrying (or whatever) your current gf after a few years then start seriously thinking of option 2....


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