Are these the signs?

LegacyUser

Hi!
I would just like to ask you wise people about something as having read a few threads here it occurs to me that there are valuable opinions to be gained here!

Ok I am with my OH nearly 2 years. In general everything is great. i love her, she loves me and I can see myself with her for the rest of m life!

But here is the thing, in the last weeks we have had a fairly big fight, Now this was my fault, I apologised and I can do no more. The details i don't think are important.

Here is the thing, in my going through the motions of the fighting I thought about the things that I dont see as right between us. And in the last few days I can't seem to get them out of my head.

At one stage, (while drunk) she pushed me away from her in bed sayng..." we have to stop, we work together" WE DON'T WORK TOGETHER...I freaked, she apologised, said she didn't know where it came from and we moved on.

Another time (again after booze) she pushed me off her saying that its not working for her, we were finished, I needed to be more dominant...I mean WTF, I didn't know what to say, she apologised profusly, didnt remember it, again didn't know where it came from.

A more general thing is her constant need to tell me how attractive other men are, from celebs on tv to someone on the street, I would not mind this every now and again, i.e. Brad Pitt oooooh kind of comments, its just the barage and the sometimes inappropriateness of it, for eg a few weeks ago she said to her friend how she was "perving on x on facebook while bored in work" while I was sitting on the couch next to her, I just thought that it was cringworthy!!!

Now having said al the above she always tells me Im great, very attractive etc. There is never any intended malice in it and alcohol is more often than not an issue... Its just I think that the combination of the above may be the root of something more sinister.

Would really like some opinions on the above and whether I am over reacting? All advice would be greatly appreciated as I feel we are at a crossroads now and I don't want to lose the best thing in my life unless....

Sardonicat

Am I wrong? wrote: »

Now having said al the above she always tells me Im great, very attractive etc. There is never any intended malice in it and alcohol is more often than not an issue... Its just I think that the combination of the above may be the root of something more sinister.
....

Re read your post, especially the bit I highlighted, and think long and hard about how often your OH's alcohol consumption is linked to behaviour that is making you feel confused or like crap.

Now, I don't know how much or how often she drinks and how much of a role it's playing in your problems, but you might want to think about it. The word alcohol jumped out at me from your post. We have a tendency to accect bad behaviour when the person is drunk and sometimes we fail to see that the drinking is the issue. "Drunk" is not an excuse for bad behaviour, but, often it is the cause and this is a problem.

I may be completely off course here, but just thought I'd offer a bit of food for thought.

Good luck.

LighterGuy

Warning signals? Not so much at the moment...
Thats the thing about hearing a person say something while dreaming. It can mess with your head. Cause we all understand dreams can be random, but also can be inspired by what you think about. Best not to think about it.

As for her saying whos hot alot? ... as a bloke that would annoy me too. especially the facebook bit. As the bf you dont really wanna hear that. Sure a women would get peeved at her bf if he was staring at page 3 of the sun.

So at the moment I think they arent exactly warning signals. Something you would brush off. But remember if anything else popped up kinda thing.