confused and down over girl in college

arsenallegend

I'm halfway through my year in my college course right now. At the start of it i befriended a girl a few years younger then me during the first week and we actually became very good friends in the class. She tell me private things about her life and i would to her, we'd flirt, write to each other on facebook all the time. Everyone in class asked me was there something going on between us two. I fell for her like a ton of bricks the only probelm she had a boyfriend. Anyway on facebook one night a few weeks back i decided to say i how i feel, i said to her i liked her.

Okay this is where my probelm begins, she has turned agaisn't me in a big way and actually has made my life hell in class. She said i put her in awkward position and that i read into things the wrong way(i disagreed on this). She deleted me from facebook, hasn't said a word to me since. Anytime i talk in class she tuts or gives me a bitchy look, when i sit down for lunch with the class she turns her back to me. When one of the girls in my class took me aside and told me she feels awkward and doesn't know what to say to me i decided i go up to her and say something. I made the first steps and decided to chat with her, she was polite but very cold towards me.

We went out on a college night out during the week, we were all having a good time drinking and laughing. She came up to me and said she wanted to chat, she basically said she loved her Bf, never did anything to give me the idea that she fancied me, she regretted deleting me from facebook and promised me she put me back on her friends list(she hasn't done so, so far:(). I was pretty tipsy at the time so thats all i remeber. i shook hands with her and said lets forget it now and said nothing else to me all night(i regret doing that without having my say, it makes me feel like i did everythign wrong). anyway half way through the night i was a little more sober and a guy in my class came up to me and said he had a talk with the girl and he told she said to him that if she wasn't with her Bf she would meet me, which he denied saying the next day.

I'm so confused, depressed, i can barely sleep or eat cause i let this girl get underneath my skin, i've still got big feelings for this girl. I'm even close to walking out of the course cause of it . what advise could you give me and do you think going by what i said this girl will befriend me again or is that a bad idea?.

Thanks for your advice

LegacyUser

Lad she has a boyfriend. think about it this way although she hasn't done anything with you, BUT she has gotten close and is flirting with you. Hypothetically speaking imagine if she left her boyfriend for you, how would you know that she won't be flirting with someone else behind your back and could potentially leave you later down the line.

One last thing: Do know let her influence any decision about your education, have for self respect than that. Toughen up and smile and say hello to her in class don't be overly friendly but don't shy away either.

JonathanAnon

I've been in a situation like this.. unfortunately what the other lad in the class said is gonna play on your mind.. as it encourages you to try it on with her again... But she's told you that she loves her boyfriend and that she didnt mean to lead you on (which may or may not be true)..

My advice would be similar to above.. The best you can do is leave her alone unless she initiates communication, and certainly dont try it on with her again on the basis of what "the guy from your class" said... Even if it was true, she is STILL going with her boyfriend so it's a moot point.. It's certainly going to be hard, but you will get past this malaise with time.. Try to keep busy and do things to keep your mind off it..

arsenallegend

JonathanAnon wrote: »

I've been in a situation like this.. unfortunately what the other lad in the class said is gonna play on your mind.. as it encourages you to try it on with her again... But she's told you that she loves her boyfriend and that she didnt mean to lead you on (which may or may not be true)..

My advice would be similar to above.. The best you can do is leave her alone unless she initiates communication, and certainly dont try it on with her again on the basis of what "the guy from your class" said... Even if it was true, she is STILL going with her boyfriend so it's a moot point.. It's certainly going to be hard, but you will get past this malaise with time.. Try to keep busy and do things to keep your mind off it..

What he said to me really has left me feeling uneasy about the whole thing, but i don't plan to do anything anyway. i wouldn't have said i liked her unless she was flirting with me and leading me on which i believe she did (which she denies). The tough thing is were mates with the same people in college and has left the whole group very uncomfortable, so when we go out she's there plus we are in the same group for a upcoming project we have to do, so trying to keep my mind busy will be tough.

Thats my plan from now on for the rest of the year together, i have no plans with trying it on with her again, the whole experience with her has left me feeling very cold towards her that in fact she's one of my least favourite people in class right now.

i have no plans of talking to her but i have the girls in clas coming up to me saying she wants to talk to you but she feels awkward but when i go up to talk to her i just feel she really doesn't want me anywhere near her.