Short series I am making.

andyterryjay

Hey guys,

I would like all opinions and or criticisms you have of these videos.

I am currently planning Parts 3, 4, and 5 for Christmas. The fifth will be the finale.

I'm 16 and do all camerawork, editing etc so go easy


Part 1 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcxM1ovGcLs

Part 2 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=shvAcTf7JNs


I have lots of other videos and more to come other than this series of videos. Any feedback would be really appreciated. Thanks.

reece

only had a look at the first one (time is money ).

Yeah, apart from the blatant copyright infringement I have to say I really liked it and watched it all the way through. Id prefer to see the cut back to the phone as a slow pan or zoom. Everything else I liked. What camera were you using ?- nice dept of field / pull focus shot when she was walking away

andyterryjay

i was using a Canon EOS 550D with the Kit Lens. It's a brilliant camera. Yeah i agree with the phone part, and also with the copyright... *cough* *cough*. But i'll be recording my own soundtrack for the next ones

AnonoBoy

Just a few notes:

Putting 'An Andrew Jordan Film' as the first title gives off a whiff of ego as if people are expected to know who you are already.

From sitting on the submissions panel of a pretty big Irish film festival in the past I know that selection committees groan a bit when they see the 'A Joe Smith Film' or the like come up at the start of a piece.

Besides that it the cut could do with a good bit of tightening with the edit. There's a lot of flab at the start that could be tightend up - get into the story as soon as possible. It takes 1'20" before we get anywhere. You could honestly tell that much of the story in 20 seconds.

In fact now that I watched it the whole episode it just really plays as a music video for most of it. The song is too over-emotional to put over characters we've just met and for something as small as someone merely being late to meet his girlfriend (the audience aren't told that this happens all the time - maybe some dialogue would help that).

The whole thing could be reduced to 1 minute and serve as the first scene of the opening episode.

It does look well though. Nicely shot for the most part.

I find it always better to not put any music down that you don't have rights to though, even for a rough cut. When you put new music down you'll find you need to go back and change some of the cuts as they won't feel right. Best not to get tied to music that you won't be able to use.

andyterryjay

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Thanks for the feedback.

That was something that I realised the first time I watched it through. It was too dragged out. I had thought that by dragging it out i could somehow get the audience to get to know the characters a little. And the dialogue I did have i cut from the video.

I amen't going to redo the video or do a new edit. Mostly because I am in the process of writing the new episodes, they feature much more content, characters, dialogue, and meaning. I will also be doing a score for it myself with a friend.

The name thing, yes I completely agree but I didn't make this with the intention of putting it in a competition or anything. I make movies with €0 budgets. I don't think I have ever spent a cent apart from the camera obviously.

I actually did make a video for a competition though if you would like to see that. It's for the HSE Open Your Eyes competition.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNCYv1g64xI

AnonoBoy

That ad is well done.

It's all a learning curve so keep up the good work.

Less is more though so if you keep your stories tight and to the point they'll always be more interesting.

Tallon

copyright infringement? No such thing on youtube when it's for amature stuff like this.

I liked it, but as was said, it was a bit long. maybe cut it a short bit.

Also, the kick at the end was dreadful :pac:

andyterryjay

Tallon wrote: »

copyright infringement? No such thing on youtube when it's for amature stuff like this.

I liked it, but as was said, it was a bit long. maybe cut it a short bit.

Also, the kick at the end was dreadful :pac:

Thanks, yeah the next ones will be better hopefully

And yes, my actor isn't the best and didn't want to actually kick him. Haha... Rookie.

Well we are actually working on getting his acting skills to improve at the moment before we shoot the rest, but it will still be amateur acting I think.
Except for my actress she is actually an actress.

andyterryjay

AnonoBoy wrote: »

That ad is well done.

It's all a learning curve so keep up the good work.

Less is more though so if you keep your stories tight and to the point they'll always be more interesting.

Thanks man,

Yeah, I've come a long way in the last 2 years though. I started properly when I got my first mini DV camcorder three years ago and have tried to be always making or planning videos. With each video I can see them getting better, whether it be the camerawork, the sound editing, the videoediting, or the overall quality of the video.
God if you were to see some of the videos i still have on YouTube from only just a year ago