6 questions about gender

L.Jenkins

I was checking another forum I frequent for support on occasion and happened to find one particularly interesting thread. The thread creator got me thinking, but I haven't come to answer them myself yet. So I'll post them and give them a go in a bit. But here is 6 questions for trans people, well the last two questions in general. Something just for alittle fun I hope.

1. List three things you dislike most about your birth sex:
2. List three things you like most about your birth sex:
3. List three things you like most about your gender-congruent sex:
4. List three things you dislike most about your gender-congruent sex:
5. List three things you dislike most about being trans:
6. List three things you like most about being trans:

Chuchoter

What does gender congruent mean?

Rick_

It basically means equal or the same.

livlondon

List three things you dislike most about your birth sex:

• Hair, it's just everywhere, but I have faired better than others
• The Requirement to know something about organised sports
• Lack of requirement for a routine, just roll out of bed and goto work

List three things you like most about your birth sex:

• Lack of requirement for a routine, just roll out of bed and goto work (I miss that soooo muuuchhhh)
• More physical upper body strength
• being the eldest brother

List three things you dislike most about being trans:

• hor-moans
• The fact that I'll never actually properly be 100% accepted
• The morning routine, hair removal, undercoat, foundation, makeup and now HAIR!!! arrrggghhh

List three things you like most about being trans:

• I'm more likely to not kill myself (a good thing)
• I'm more likely to not kill myself (a good thing)
• I'm more likely to not kill myself (a good thing)

Freiheit

Do you feel that acceptance is much of an issue livi?.

livlondon

Acceptance is an interesting one. On one hand it's personally important and on the other it's other peoples problem.

One thing I have found is that people in general are actually more interested in themselves and just getting on. In any decent work environment it shouldn't matter. I'd like to say that my employer has been excellent but why should I have to. I don't require any special requirements, physical changes to the building, etc.. so my employer shouldn't be 'thanked' for being so good. However I live in the real world and people don't always act/think in a professional manner. I went through long interviews (technical, role) and started quite candid conversations (my situation) with my potential manager. I knew what the he needed to know. Am I unstable? Can I mix easily with my potential work colleagues? and fit into the company culture? and I spent time being quite honest and alleviating his fears. For instance before he asked I told him that if somebody was to accidentally call my he/him I wouldn't burst into tears and report them to HR, I'd gently deal with it myself. He couldn't ask, but it helped that he knew and that I'm aware of what he's worried about.

Without my employer I'd hate to think where I'd be. The work routine and the work environment have been the one constant positive thing that I've been able to hang everything else on, a true pillar.

So acceptance there doesn't matter, people have to work with the colleagues and thats it. I do think that sometimes people think they are playing a game of 'lets pretend' where everybody has to pretend that I'm a laddeeeyy but I have yet to prove this.

In the outside world, I interact with friends and family and they still accept me as a person, everybody else doesn't have a problem. I hate to say it but I'm doing quite well on average.

And acceptance, well I have other bigger things to worry about

L.Jenkins

List three things you dislike most about your birth sex:

1. Like most, the bodily hair!
2. Lack of ability to really express myself
3. Never knowing what it will be like to give birth.

List three things you like most about your birth sex:

1. Strength.
2. Being taken seriously, sometimes!

List three things you like most about your gender-congruent sex:

1. Being able to really express myself in a feminine way (Some day )
2. Doing what I can't do as a male.
3. Generally being happier than I am now

List three things you dislike most about your gender-congruent sex:

1. So much health care products to choose from, why can't it be simple.
2. All the unwanted male attention (I'm assuming)
3. Possibly being called a narky hormonal bítch :P I'd take it as a compliment.

List three things you dislike most about being trans:

1. Acceptance or lack of.
2. The hoops we have to jump through.
3. Peoples opinions of us.

List three things you like most about being trans:

1. Finally getting to be me
2. Having and knowing the best of both worlds
3. Being the better person for it, having come through it all.

Freiheit

Thanks Livi, interesting to hear your feelings.

Shane McGowan isn't a role model, but he did say " Don't give a f**k what anyone thinks of you, if they have a problem with you it's their problem"...So long as not taken to extremes a solid ideology.

livlondon

Your quite right about Mr MacGowans ability to be a role model

Although his words are quite right and in moderation something to find comfort in.

deirdre_dub

List three things you dislike most about your birth sex:

1. Body hair
2. It's not me - I just don't know how to "do" male
3. Social expectations

List three things you like most about your birth sex:

1. The strength was occasionally cool
2. Being taken a bit more seriously
3. Being able to roll out of bed and just throw whatever clothes were on the floor onto my body (after doing the sniff test to make sure they didn't need to be washed - OMG!).

List three things you like most about your gender-congruent sex:

1. It's me
2. It's me
3. It's me

I get to express myself in ways I never got to do so before.

List three things you dislike most about your gender-congruent sex:

Loss of the things that I liked about my birth sex, though the loss of those things is NOTHING compared to the gain of being able to properly express myself.

List three things you dislike most about being trans:

1. The fear of transphobia / discrimination
2. Sometimes not being taken seriously as a member of my true gender
3. The sheer amount of work involved in changing my gender - everything from learning how to do makeup to going through my legal name change (though I think I'm reaching the end of all that - hopefully!).

List three things you like most about being trans:

1. Being in the company of wonderful trans people - people I may never have gotten to meet were I not trans myself
2. The social life
3. It's made me a better person - I've seen gender from both sides, and I've had (and am having) an amazing journey