Trying to decipher if girl is actually interested in me or not!

grut312

Apologies if this is in the wrong forum, kinda new to boards. Basically I was looking for someone to interpret if a girl is actually interested in me or not, I'm really not the best in these sort of situations and just wanted to bounce this off a few people.

So there's a girl in work that I get on great with - have similar interests, get on like a house on fire...etc. We don't work directly together and wouldn't see each other that much in work really. Always kind of felt like there was more there than just being friends whenever we talked though.

Anyway, to make a long story short, we were out recently with work colleagues and we hooked up. I went back to her place and stayed the night. Had a great time, we talked for ages and both told each other we liked each other. She dropped me home the next day, we kissed goodbye and afterwards I got a text off her thanking me for being so cool about the situation and telling me I was a gent. (Not sure what to make of this really?)

So after this, I left it a few days and decided to call her, and see if she had plans for the following weekend. I regret not just texting her now, but anyway. We chatted on the phone for a while, and she said how she had to go home for the next couple of weekends. However then she asked if I was going to be around work in the next few days and that we should meet for coffee. She said to email her and let her know.

So I emailed her and she responded that she was really busy and wouldn't be free, but that maybe we could grab a post-work drink next week and that she would talk to her other colleagues in work about it??

I'm kinda confused, at first it seemed she was interested, but after those last few interactions with her I'm thinking she just wants to be friends and is eager to have colleagues around so as not to be alone with me.

Ideas/Opinions?

Grut312

I am a friend

"a gent" is a compliment.. Only nut jobs want to be with a non-gent...

I would pick up the phone and ask her out. Ill guess she took it that you were not that pushed when you didnt contact her for a while. She seems to be playing it careful but did give you big hints up to that. Call her for a chat tomorrow and ask her out for dinner during the week.

silkworm53

Meet her and her work mates.
Make friends with her mates, act like they are old friends of yours and you should win her approval. She's probably expecting you to chicken out. Don't.

tolosenc

grut312 wrote: »

Basically I was looking for someone to interpret if a girl is actually interested in me or not

+

grut312 wrote: »

both told each other we liked each other

=

Yes.

grut312 wrote: »

Ideas/Opinions?

Stop beating about the bush? Albeit advice I rarely follow myself, but being direct is often the best path.

LighterGuy

grut312 wrote: »

...I'm kinda confused, at first it seemed she was interested, but after those last few interactions with her I'm thinking she just wants to be friends and is eager to have colleagues around so as not to be alone with me...

Exactly the same conclusion I came to from reading your post. Thats what I say has indeed happened.

grut312

Thanks for the replys guys, if I was responding to a thread like this I would give the exact same advice as tolosenc - it's just so much different when the shoe's on the other foot!! Basically there's a huge element of trying to save face with this seeing as we work together and have some mutual work friends too.

Also forgot to mention that she recently broke up with a long term boyfriend, not sure how much faith I'd put in her telling me she liked me at 3 in the morning too, easy to say that to pretty much anyone at that stage of the night really! But at the same time I really have to emphasize that we got on so well together, have same interests...etc. Better off just to let it take care of itself over time I think, I'll definitely see her out again at some stage. If something happens, it happens, if it doesn't then so be it.

silkworm53

grut312 wrote: »

Thanks for the replys guys, if I was responding to a thread like this I would give the exact same advice as tolosenc - it's just so much different when the shoe's on the other foot!! Basically there's a huge element of trying to save face with this seeing as we work together and have some mutual work friends too.

Also forgot to mention that she recently broke up with a long term boyfriend, not sure how much faith I'd put in her telling me she liked me at 3 in the morning too, easy to say that to pretty much anyone at that stage of the night really! But at the same time I really have to emphasize that we got on so well together, have same interests...etc. Better off just to let it take care of itself over time I think, I'll definitely see her out again at some stage. If something happens, it happens, if it doesn't then so be it.

It won't 'just happen.'
Nothing ever just happens.
You have to make a move right now or else you can just forget about it.
You only have a narrow window and then the opportunity is gone.
Strike while the iron is hot I say.