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freshly separated

  • 04-11-2010 7:29pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Ok guys, hers's the story..

    recently found out finance has been cheating for quite some time... Backround info is we have two kids, house and have been together nearly eight years.. Like all couples had our ups and downs but I always tried to work through them.. We were tipping along nicely and I really think he would still be pretending if I hadn't found those texts...
    In the last few weeks i have found things out that i could never have guess or believed and it really has changed the type of person he really is..

    Anyway.. long story short.. We meet, he cries, I take him back on the promise that things will be better this time, but they are not.. We went our separate today and are going to try to be amicable bout things because of the kids..

    The thing is i really am hurt that he has been living a lie for so long and i don't know if any of our long relationship... How long does it take to get used to being on my own again...


Comments

  • #2
    SuperStarHoney
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 244 ✭✭SuperStarHoney


    I think it would be a different length of time for everyone.

    Given that this was a serious long term relationship I would suggest you attend counselling where you will get the necessary support to work through all that has happened and become stronger again over time.


  • #3
    luciusesox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36 ✭luciusesox


    Hi OP and I'm genuinely so sorry for your situation. I also completely appreciate the crushing sense of hurt about how someone you thought you knew so well could have been living a lie.

    I am going through the separation stages with my wife of 17 years who I discovered having an affair on Facebook (discovered thank God, 4 days before they were going to rendezvous in London to consummate the act). While I am over the initial shock and starting to move on as best I can, it is the hurt that had I not found out, she would be quite happy continuing along with our life and her affair. I also would never had entertained the thought that she would be the type of person to do this.

    As for how long, I'm the last person to ask but as a working proposition I'm going with one month for one year, so I've about 15 months to go, lol.

    Good luck.


  • #4
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Thanks guys...
    Hate to think it's going to be a long road, hingsight is great really when it's too late...

    Kinda knew our relationship was fizzling out but just thought I he had a it more respect for me than that... Don't know what I should be feeling.. At the moment it is relief because i was very lonely even though i was in a relationship... time will tell ???


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