Songs in the Queen's English

St._Andalou

Lunchtime! I'm bored. I got thinking about pop songs in the Queen's English thanks to watching Spitting Image. What would yours be?

One's whipped ice dairy drink brings the attention of many males to one's place of residence and/or employment
And they declare its quality far surpasses that of yours
Absolutely it surpasses yours
One could give you the recipe
But one would have to demand compensation

who the fug

Nice one

St._Andalou

Reference Spitting Image, the Queen's version of Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxApyFKDQAQ

Once I was adored
I was glorified
But then we had so many scandals
That their sympathy was lorst
Now I have to pay my taxes
And one’s children are divorced
Go on now go
Walk out the door
You’re not welcome anymore.

Oh no, not one.
One will survive.
Oh as long as Charles is next in line
I’ve got to stay alive!
If they tax one I don’t care!
I’ve got lots of cash to spare.

mikom

It is a necessity that I acquaint you with my sentiments,
I must coerce you to comprehend

At no time shall I conclude our relations
At no time shall I leave leave you in the lurch
At no time shall I finagle and forsake you
At no time shall I cause you lamentation
At no time shall I say adieu
At no time shall I prevaricate and cause you a disservice.

"You just got rickrolled by the Fry, my boy."

I just wanna tell you how Im feeling
Gotta make you understand

never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

St._Andalou

Mater, I have recently performed a homocidal act on a gentleman.
I positioned a firearm against his cranium, engaged the apparatus
It pains me to report that at the present he is fully deceased.

Momma, I just killed a man
Put a gun against his head
Pulled my trigger, now he's dead

Queen, "Bohemian Rhapsody"

--Kaiser--

I have a predilection for large posteriors and this I will not dispute,
You other gentlemen cannot refute

I like big butts and I cannot lie
You other brothers cannot lie

can't be arsed doing the rest

St._Andalou

One more, then I'm back to work:

Would you not prefer it if your betrothed were sexually attractive, as one is?
Would you not prefer it if your betrothed could be induced to a state of untamed sexual abandon, as one can?
Would you not?
Would you not?

Don'tcha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
Don'tcha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me?
Don'tcha? Don'tcha?

PussyCat Dolls, "Don't Cha"

JayeL

My loved ones implored upon me the urgency, in their opinion, of my going to a rehabilitation facility
I had to insist, on three separate occasions, that I did not feel this was necessary
While I accept I have had many depressive episodes in the past
There will be quite a reaction upon my return to the limelight and no doubt you will notice this
*
For one thing, my schedule doesn't permit such an absence
Besides, my father is of the opinion I am of sound mind and body
Despite the fact he, also, asked me to attend a rehabilitative setting
But again, I insisted - thrice - that in my mind this was not a valid option.
*
I would rather stay at home and listen to the music of Raymond Hathaway
In any case, my work cannot be abandoned for the required period of one fortnight and 3 days
And do you know, I feel there's very little in life worth knowing that I cannot learn from the music of the aforementioned Mr Hathaway.
*
My academic achievements were quite limited.
But I know it is not available in a liquid form of approximately 30 millitres and thus could not be dispensed into such a vessel.