Old Flames making contact

LegacyUser

hey guys,

I guess I'm here to look for advice but also maybe some of your thoughts.

I was seeing a guy earlier in the year, and for the most part it was pretty good. Went home for the summer, kept contact but various issues cropped up and he ended it. I was quite hurt by it, as it ended badly and he was unfair, but there was no contact for 3 months since. Even though we remained friends on fb and regularly I saw him online. Both from Dublin and never saw him out. However last week, he brought up chat on fb in the evening and asked how I was. We talked for hours, never talking about what happened, just casual things, but the same way we used to always talk. I admit it felt nice and comfortable once again. I suppose thats why I feel so sad today. I really do him, and it would have worked if it wasn't for other people and circumstances, but the tables turned in the end and my being upset turned him against me, as if I was over reacting.

I know Im grasping straws in a way, I would like to give it another shot. But I could never broach the subject myself, as this could be nothing other than a casual how are you talk. Im just looking for experiences people may have had with this before. As in I can say, my last talk with him when we ended it was horrendous, so bad I couldnt have imagined him wanting to talk again in fear of him thinking, I would think he wanted to try again.

Am I being overly confident that he may want to try again or is playing it by year the best option. I was very surprised when he brought up chat, truly didnt expect it. Really appreciate your comments and thanks.

Id also ask that people dont start saying, get over him, stop over analysing and move on. Im truly not, I'm simply just scoping whether I should perhaps try again or leave this in the past.

Beruthiel

You have two options.
Ask him out.
Or, delete him from Facebook and move on.
Life is too short to be wasting time wondering.

LegacyUser

My opinion is he was just being friendly and thought he'd left it long enough without communication that you'd be over him and wouldn't go reading too deep. I know I've made contact with old flames on chat in the past when I thought enough time had passed. I think you're reading too much into it and need to forget about him. If that means deleting him off facebook, do. Be careful if you're plannig to ask him out. Rejection could put you back to stage one.

LegacyUser

OP, I know you came here looking for someone to tell you what to do, but the reality is that some people will say 'Yes, go for it' and some people will say 'Move on'. Why? Because no two situations or relationships or couples are the same. Only you know deep down what you want to do - and if you want to give it another try, nothing anyone else says to you is going to change your mind.

If it were me, I have to say that if I still had feelings for the guy and wished it had not ended, I'd bite the bullet and ask him to meet for a coffee and to talk. Like the poster above said, life's too short to wonder. It might not work out (again), he might not even want to meet up with you again, but at least you'll know for sure.

LegacyUser

Hi OP, here thanks for replies. Really appreciate it. Got a text and all from him today. We'll see where it goes!!!