Is it normal to feel this sad?

Elbi

Hey all

Just looking for some advice or opinions or just something to make me feel like i'm not a lonely old looser for feeling this way.

Was seeing a guy for only a few months (about 4). Anyway he asked to meet on Monday, I text him that day to let him know my roommate and her boyfriend will be home so maybe we could go to the cinema or something, he never text back but being a brutal texter I took no notice and assumed id see him later…………. He never turned up.

I have to say I was a little sad/cross over it but I kind of thought he wasn’t for me and I was thinking of finishing it so let him off but the next day I got cross sent a text saying I was sick of him and that was that (because he easily could have text with an excuse during the week he is like that, so I said id get my bit in) anyway I heard no more from him. Not a text to say sorry for not calling, not a text in reply to my text, nothing!!!!

The thing is at the start I was like "let him off he isn’t worth it" but now as time goes on (nearly 2 weeks) I'm starting to feel really sad over it, its more cross at the cheek of him not to even cancel our date, which he arranged… I know you might think i'm crazy for feeling so sad over it but I kind of feel worthless, like it didn’t matter if he didn’t text or didn’t show up.

Sorry for such a long winded post I just wanted to know if any of yee ladies experiences something similar and if yee had any advice on how to just more past feeling sad and angry.


Thanks

toothie

Elbi,
A very similar thing happened to me about 4 weeks ago. I had been seeing a guy for about 4 months too and he went 5 days without texting/ringing me (and it was definitely his turn!). I had left it go, and wasn't going to contact him as I didn't want to be classed as clingy, but even at this stage I was wondering what was up. Finally he got in contact to arrange to meet up and when he turned up that evening, he broke up with me and gave the silliest excuse ever, but anyway, that's not the point. Initially I felt like you, great to be free, we weren't suited, etc. but after a week or so, I hit such a low and felt really sad. I'm starting to get over it now. So what you are experiencing is completely normal, you mightn't even miss him, just the feeling of being in a relationship and it really hurts. Look after yourself, do all the things you love to feel better, chat to friends, treat yourself. Someone who didn't even bother to show up or contact you since did not deserve you.
Take care.

Xiney

Hi Elbie,

I've moved this to Personal Issues for you - it's a forum specifically for giving advice. Take care of yourself

Xiney

Elbi

Thanks very much for the reply, Im very sorry to hear it happened to you but now I know now that im not being crazy for having this sadness as it started it hit you too after a while,

I was fine with it but as the days went on i went over and over it in my head, because he was textin me all day sunday and being all about me and then for such a change by monday I was like "what did i do wrong", "what did i say" "is it cos im not pretty and thin enough" and all this was doing was wrecking my head and making me feel insecure and down,

I have come up with the attitude "he's not worth it" and im tryin to stick to it but the sadness does get the better of us at times,

LighterGuy

Elbi wrote: »

... I was fine with it but as the days went on i went over and over it in my head, because he was textin me all day sunday and being all about me and then for such a change by monday I was like "what did i do wrong", "what did i say" "is it cos im not pretty and thin enough" and all this was doing was wrecking my head and making me feel insecure and down...

This is just a mental mind game our minds will play on us after a bad experience with another. Think of when a person gets cheated on, they start to feel ugly or not good enough. Its that knock on mental effect.

And its perfectly natural for you to feel the above.. questioning if you did anything wrong. But its best to stop thinking like that. At the end of the day you cant let every bad experience get to you op because you wont be able to move forward

But you are right to think to hell with this guy. Not even texting you back is his true colours showing. So you know what he is now

Mrs Garth Brooks

Same thing happened to me a few weeks ago.

Fancied a guy for ages. Asked him for a drink. He said yes, which got my hopes up. Told me he wanted to see me, the same weekend as my birthday. That was over a month ago. Told me he really liked me. Asked me to come into my room. Even got prank calls from him. .... Does someone prank call you if they want to use you???

And NOTHING. And its fking killing me, how someone can be such an asshole as tell me crap like liking me, and asking to come into my room. What did it all mean???

What did i do wrong? No explanation or anything.

wylo

alot of men, actually most men are cowards and take the easier route of ignoring.
toothie, in fairness with your story he couldn't have done much more, (bar giving a stupid reason), at least he had the decency to arrange to meet and do it in person.