University Graduation

magneticimpulse

My only other sibling has their graduation soon. I too am finishing a post grad and in the country im in they dont have graduations. So I would like to go back to Dublin for it. However I was told, there are only 2 tickets for parents and if you dont have a ticket you cant go.


Im quite surprised as Im sure people have their boyfriends or girlfriends going along as well (at least for my undergraduate degree it was like that).

I would have to book flights and it would be nice to get a family photo with the 2 of us in Cap and Gown with the parents.

How strict are they in Irish Universities with how many guests go to the graduation? I ask because I assume people have boyfriends or girlfriends graduating and i assume they expect to go along as well?

LegacyUser

At my graduation there was only two tickets given to me. My parents used them. On the day other people had siblings and family come however they were not able to get into the graduation ceremony. They waited outside till it finished and took whatever photos then

Chinafoot

magneticimpulse wrote: »

My only other sibling has their graduation soon. I too am finishing a post grad and in the country im in they dont have graduations. So I would like to go back to Dublin for it. However I was told, there are only 2 tickets for parents and if you dont have a ticket you cant go.


Im quite surprised as Im sure people have their boyfriends or girlfriends going along as well (at least for my undergraduate degree it was like that).

I would have to book flights and it would be nice to get a family photo with the 2 of us in Cap and Gown with the parents.

How strict are they in Irish Universities with how many guests go to the graduation? I ask because I assume people have boyfriends or girlfriends graduating and i assume they expect to go along as well?

When I graduated we were told 2 tickets only with no exceptions. This was due to the massive numbers that were graduating and it simply wasn't feasible to have 4 people in attendance for each person graduating. It also depends on the size of the venue involved.

Also, in my experience, the graduation ceremony is more of a family thing, ie: the parents. Boyfriends/Girlfriends tend to go for the meal/drinks afterwards. My boyfriend certainly didn't expect to go and neither did the partners of any friends of mine. I ended up not going to mine but was told afterwards that it was mostly parents. Of course not everyone has 2 parents around, or they might chose to bring someone else, but the expectation (again in my experience of both mine and others graduations) is that its 2 members of the close family that go.

By all means ask your sibling to ask the college if they can have another ticket, but, again depending on numbers, don't be too surprised if they tell her no.

mikemac

Yep, just two tickets per graduate.
Now you might be allowed to stand at the back but probably not.
Do remember that hotels have fire regulations and limits on numbers in a room. From working in hotels it was looked at for every booking.

Realy, it's your family, especially your parents who want to be there and get a seat.

Siblings and your boyfriend/girlfriend can go for a meal and drinks afterwards.
They can prop up the hotel bar and down a few shots while they wait :cool:

Even in the largest hotels in Ireland, it's just not possible to give unlimited tickets to every graduate that go to a ceremony for a large university or IT

magneticimpulse

It would be just me interested in going to siblings graduation with parents. Theres no girlfriends/boyfriends.

I was asking because at my graduation they said it was strict and only 2 people could come, however on the actual day itself i was abit annoyed as everyone brought their parents plus boyfriend/girlfriend and in the end there was actually plenty of room and they didnt even ask for the tickets etc.

Like that maybe people dont bother going etc or somebody only has 1 guest etc. Its not in a hotel, but yep i understand there would be fire regulation. Im not too bother about the ceromony itself...i just really want to be there to get the photo and i want a photo with my parents.

Since i wont have a graduation myself as they dont exist in my country, there wont be an opportunity to get photo with parents as they will be working etc. I thought it be nice to go to university, order Cap and Gown and get group photo. Literally talking sneaking in photo and stuff.

Im just wondering if its possible? As Irish Graduations are normally huge anyway and they usually split them over a few days as far as i remember? Has anyone gone for family photo/cermony?

Ive to fly from another country to UK and then onto Dublin...hence its not like im popping around the corner for the dinner in the evening. In which case i wont waste the plane tickets if its just going for dinner in the evening. Sounds cruel, but i just think it be nice for parents to have family photo of their 2 children graduating. Ive worked hard as well over 4 years and gutted graduations, cap/gown or photos dont happen in my country

Nevyn

You can be in the photos which are taken after the ceremony and yes this is standard practice in all large universities and colleges. Too bad where you are attending they do not have this tradition but your siblings graduations is their day not yours.

Monkey61

It is certainly standard practice in Universities to only have 2 tickets, I have never heard of it being a more relaxed affair. I wanted my girlfriend to be there, so she went with my mother. Not everyone brings both parents, sometimes only one parent is particularly bothered etc.

Sometimes exceptions are made, but only under extremely extenuating circumstances, for instance my friend had been raised by her mum and stepfather since she was 3, but her Dad was still a big part of her life. Obviously both fathers wanted to go and she couldn't choose. Eventually she got an extra ticket allocated, but it was a massive struggle because there is only a set number of seats and I presume it was only possible because someone else didn't want both tickets. I highly doubt that someone wanting their sister to be there as well as both parents is really grounds for an exception to be made.

And also in reference to the last bit of your post - It's not your graduation!!! I really don't think a fake picture of you in a cap and gown that aren't yours at someone else's graduation would really be that nice for your parents!!!

Penn

I agree with Thaedydal, the graduation is your sibling's day in recognition of their achievement. While its unfortunate that you never got one for your own achievement, that's just the way it is. If you were in a cap and gown at their graduation, then it stops being their graduation and becomes your (plural) graduation.

I've actually had three graduations because of the course I picked though, but none of my siblings were at any of them. I'm actually not even sure if you could get a cap and gown, normally you have to be actually graduating and have booked one in advance. Which means you'd have to get one elsewhere, and pretty much carry it around with you for the day. Is it really worth it?

Kimono-Girl

magneticimpulse wrote: »

My only other sibling has their graduation soon. I too am finishing a post grad and in the country im in they dont have graduations. So I would like to go back to Dublin for it. However I was told, there are only 2 tickets for parents and if you dont have a ticket you cant go.


Im quite surprised as Im sure people have their boyfriends or girlfriends going along as well (at least for my undergraduate degree it was like that).

For the ceremony they are strict BUT they usually have a screen outside for family/others to watch it on, for my OH's graduation last month, me our daughter and his brothers had a drink in the bar while watching him graduate. (obviously his parents got the two tickets) we met up with his parents while he got their class photo done, and then had a family professional one done with all of us there and him in the gown!


so if i were you id go, watch the ceremony on the screen and be there then for the photos afterward.

magneticimpulse wrote: »

I would have to book flights and it would be nice to get a family photo with the 2 of us in Cap and Gown with the parents.

why would you wear a cap and Gown though? they are only for those graduating on the day, and I'd imagine your sibling may feel their day was being hogged, if i were you I'd just dress up smart for photo's and leave it at that!

Chinafoot

magneticimpulse wrote: »

It would be just me interested in going to siblings graduation with parents. Theres no girlfriends/boyfriends.

Both myself and others responded with the example of boyfriends/girlfriends because that is what you mentioned in your opening post.

magneticimpulse wrote: »

I was asking because at my graduation they said it was strict and only 2 people could come, however on the actual day itself i was abit annoyed as everyone brought their parents plus boyfriend/girlfriend and in the end there was actually plenty of room and they didnt even ask for the tickets etc.

Again, it entirely depends on the university, the class size and the venue.

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Like that maybe people dont bother going etc or somebody only has 1 guest etc. Its not in a hotel, but yep i understand there would be fire regulation. Im not too bother about the ceromony itself...i just really want to be there to get the photo and i want a photo with my parents.

Often the college authorites won't know who is and isn't bringing two people until the day itself. Two tickets are allocated for each student and they work off that.

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Since i wont have a graduation myself as they dont exist in my country, there wont be an opportunity to get photo with parents as they will be working etc. I thought it be nice to go to university, order Cap and Gown and get group photo. Literally talking sneaking in photo and stuff.

Were you planning to order the cap and gown from your siblings university? I can't see you getting away with that. You'll be asked for your student number at the very least, and there's a good chance they'll have a list of all those graduating. Most places request that students book the cap and gown in advance also.

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Im just wondering if its possible? As Irish Graduations are normally huge anyway and they usually split them over a few days as far as i remember? Has anyone gone for family photo/cermony?

Ive to fly from another country to UK and then onto Dublin...hence its not like im popping around the corner for the dinner in the evening. In which case i wont waste the plane tickets if its just going for dinner in the evening. Sounds cruel, but i just think it be nice for parents to have family photo of their 2 children graduating. Ive worked hard as well over 4 years and gutted graduations, cap/gown or photos dont happen in my country

Its a shame that your country doesn't have them but I'd have to agree with those who said this is your sibling's day and not yours. I also don't think your sibling would appreciate the fact that you are only willing to come if you can turn this into your grad ceremony too. Thats a pretty selfish move. Why not wait until you are home with your parents to organise a photograph for them to have? Leave this day to your sibling.

jon1981

Sorry but you're acting like a bit of a drama queen here. It states two tickets only, In my graduation you couldn't possibly have fitted more than 2 ppl per grad in the ceremony and it was a big venue believe me! So the others just wait outside for the picture moments OR went back into the venue when it had cleared out and took photos there ...

3 options:

go and take the chance that you might get in

or

go and wait outside till its over with everyone else who isn't complaining about it and get the photos then..

or

don't go at all!


are you a bit bitter over never having had a ceremony? Its not your day... and i would find it just weird if someone rented a cap and gowan to attend a grad ceremony of another college! Would you not feel like a bit of a spare?

LegacyUser

As has been said above, you wearing a cap and gown on the day changes it whole dynamic of the occasion - your sibling deserves to have a graduation of their own to recognise their achievement. You've already graduated from an undergrad degree and had your own day - don't hog someone elses. In my opinion that's quite selfish.

I also think that saying you won't go if you can't wear a cap and gown is childish - you should want to be there for your siblings sake not for what you might get out of it.

magneticimpulse

Well being unemployed, i dont really have €500 to fork out on return flights to Dublin. Hence its not like im being a drama queen about it. And I expect my sibling to be at my actual exam day to watch...so its not like they would be left out of it.

Also alot of my friends are from the UK and they have photos taken with their siblings,and family so the idea was not that odd to me.

I am delighted to hear from someone who said there was a screen on TV and they were able to watch. That would be great.

Last year I contacted a company that does the Irish Universities Cap and Gown and they found one for my country and asked if I was going to University event or wanted it in Private. At the time I was thinking of having it private. But my father is in a job which does not have flexible time to get time off. In fact he only has time off for siblings day and im not sure how they are fixed for mine as they would have to fly over etc (hopefully with sibling as well). I asked sibling and they didnt mind about the photo. We were thinking of getting 4 photos done. Me by myself, with them and then all of us with our parents.

magneticimpulse

jon1981 wrote: »

Sorry but you're acting like a bit of a drama queen here. It states two tickets only, In my graduation you couldn't possibly have fitted more than 2 ppl per grad in the ceremony and it was a big venue believe me! So the others just wait outside for the picture moments OR went back into the venue when it had cleared out and took photos there ...

3 options:

go and take the chance that you might get in

or

go and wait outside till its over with everyone else who isn't complaining about it and get the photos then..

or

don't go at all!


are you a bit bitter over never having had a ceremony? Its not your day... and i would find it just weird if someone rented a cap and gowan to attend a grad ceremony of another college! Would you not feel like a bit of a spare?

No not at all. At the end of the day its for my parents and they are gutted that there is no ceremony for me. Im kinda used to the idea as ive lived here. But my mam likes to put the graduation photos in the house and I think it would be a lovely idea to have one of her children together.

Id prob suggest it in private anyway, but my sibling knows the person doing the photo (in fact we all do) at the event. It be literally 5 min photo. I dont see a difference in taking the photo in the tent or going direct to the offices? Difference being our dad wouldnt be able to get another day off work.

magneticimpulse

dc_lover wrote: »

As has been said above, you wearing a cap and gown on the day changes it whole dynamic of the occasion - your sibling deserves to have a graduation of their own to recognise their achievement. You've already graduated from an undergrad degree and had your own day - don't hog someone elses. In my opinion that's quite selfish.

I also think that saying you won't go if you can't wear a cap and gown is childish - you should want to be there for your siblings sake not for what you might get out of it.

No I didnt say that at all...I said i wont go because of the cost of flights and if i couldnt actually get a photo with family etc. then it would not exactly be worth my time. Its not selfish...but if I forked out money and then had to sit at home all day its certainly not worth it and being unemployed I cant avoid to throw away cash

Lorrs33

I've received my invitation to my graduation and it states that it's for two guests, but I'm bringing a third guest. You should just go, it's not like a bouncer will be at the door who will tell you to leave.

Chinafoot

magneticimpulse wrote: »

No I didnt say that at all...I said i wont go because of the cost of flights and if i couldnt actually get a photo with family etc. then it would not exactly be worth my time. Its not selfish...but if I forked out money and then had to sit at home all day its certainly not worth it and being unemployed I cant avoid to throw away cash

If the photo is the main thing you want then why can't you go and just wait outside? I'm not getting what the issue is. You don't need to see your sister actually receive her piece of paper, and by the sounds of it that isn't something you want anyway so go and wait outside like the other people who want to celebrate with family but don't have a ticket. If you are happy to privately rent a cap and gown then do it. I wouldn't suggest you attempt to get one from the people providing them to the actual graduates.

If it were me graduating I don't mind admitting that I would be a little miffed that my sister wanted to make it her grad too and was only willing to come for my day if she could get something out of it for herself. You say its for your parents but I fail to see why you can't do the picture at another time when you can afford the trip home. You used your dads work as an excuse but surely if it means that much to you, you could organise a cap and gown and photographer (you know the one your sibling knows..) and have the picture taken at home. Your father does actually leave work at some point, yes? Why does it have to be you and your sibling together? If your college did have a graduation ceremony would you still be so keen on a picture with your sibling? Of course you wouldn't. Unless they go to the same college, graduate in the same year and in the same class, siblings don't have graduation pictures together.

Lorrs33, nice sense of entitlement there. I hope there is a bouncer on the door tbh.

tinkerbell

Lorrs33 wrote: »

I've received my invitation to my graduation and it states that it's for two guests, but I'm bringing a third guest. You should just go, it's not like a bouncer will be at the door who will tell you to leave.

Generally at these things there IS someone on the door who will only let those with tickets in. So I imagine your third guest will not get in.

OP - I really don't think it is appropriate for you to appear in cap and gown on the day of your sibling's graduation. The day is about THEM not you, and you turning up in cap and gown I think would be disrespectful.

I can't see why you just can't do it another time like Chinafoot suggested?

boarddotie

Hi OP,

You are not a drama queen at all. I was freaking before my own Postgrad grad because we were not in with the right group and it was all a mess but on the day it was the best day ever. But I was being worrier about it and I dont blame ya for wanting a Grad yourself.

In my Uni you get 2 tickets but since it was in a proper hall with allocated seating you could go to the ticket area 2 hours before the ceremony and they had a few left over, there always will be as they will have allocations for staff who wont actually take them in the end. I would ask your sibling to try and find out if this situation exists.

if it doesnt I would still go and chance your arm! But 100% make sure that you stressing about getting a ticket doesnt impact on the sibling. It is her day after all and the last thing she needs to do is be worrying trying to 'get you in'. For my brothers Grad we have 4 extra people (2 from abroad)and with patience, begging and tears I got the 4 tickets. But the key was that there was room available. If there are no seats there are no sets full stop but the screen outside would be your next best option!

As for the photograph-have you finished your own PG yourself? if yes, then you would be quite entitled to wear your Master of X or Doctor of Philosophy gown in a photo with the sibling. Once you are bestowed (sp?) the Master of Dr you are allowed to wear that gown and often people who go into academia will buy their own gown to wear at other graduations of for formal occasions. If you have not 'graduated' yourself from your own course I wouldnt wear the gown. That would be wrong! Again, check with the sibling-it is her day!!!!

magneticimpulse

Thanks boarddotie, thats really helpful. Yes it is for Dr. degree and yes we have finished in the same year. Im happy enough to watch TV screen outside if possible. Its not like ill know anyone else there besides my sibling.

Yeah, the reason they have a cap and gown from my country, is like you said, normally Prof. etc wear their University cap and gown in their colours. Since my country doesnt officially have them, the company in Ireland actually stocks them...i know as my own prof. in dublin did his post grad in the university i went to abroad. Id only wear it for 5 mins for the photo and take it off. Im not going to wear it all day.


Its not just my dad not getting the time off work, my sibling also works as well. No my dad doesnt get time off, he works 6am til 8pm at night and its a job which doesnt have the numbers to replace him and he is on call all the time. Not to mention I dont live in Ireland, so I wont be home to have a photo done another time even if i decided to do it in private. Like I said, they dont do that in my country, so I couldnt even arrange to do it here if i wanted to.

Long story short, my sibling would be on talking terms to the person whos taking the photo on the day, but its not really someone we would ring up and arrange for another time. The company dont do photos at home, you have to go to their studio to get it done....which again I wont be in Ireland another time to do it as i dont live in Ireland.

rugbug86

Contact the university and ask for an extra ticket? I did that and got two extra tickets. You might get lucky.

magneticimpulse

Ok thanks. Im still thinking about it, ive not booked any flights. I dont get much time with my sibling so it would be lovely to do something as a family. I left Ireland when they were just about 12 years old.

I am taking into consideration of other peoples comments about that i should not bother flying home for it. I can see their point. But at same time I know if my sibling didnt bother coming over for mine id be disappointed. I will still think about all options and of course keep talking to family and him to make sure everyone is happy about it.

Chinafoot

magneticimpulse wrote: »

But at same time I know if my sibling didnt bother coming over for mine id be disappointed.

You said yourself that theres no point in forking out the money if you can't get the photo you want, ie: both you and your sibling in cap and gown in the same photo. How you can claim you'd be disappointed if your sibling didn't make the journey for yours is baffling to say the least.

When I asked if your dad ever left work, I meant that if you are home for a visit you can orgainse the photograph when your father is home from work. Nobody said anything about him taking time off.

I'll say it again, go and wait outside, have your picture taken with your sibling wearing your own personal cap and gown that you organised beforehand wihtout attempting to get it from the company supplying the actual graduates. Only do this if your sibling is happy about it because it is not your day.

I'm not going to bother responding anymore because you either can't understand what is being suggested to you or you simply don't want to.

magneticimpulse

Chinafoot wrote: »

You said yourself that theres no point in forking out the money if you can't get the photo you want, ie: both you and your sibling in cap and gown in the same photo. How you can claim you'd be disappointed if your sibling didn't make the journey for yours is baffling to say the least.

When I asked if your dad ever left work, I meant that if you are home for a visit you can orgainse the photograph when your father is home from work. Nobody said anything about him taking time off.

I'll say it again, go and wait outside, have your picture taken with your sibling wearing your own personal cap and gown that you organised beforehand wihtout attempting to get it from the company supplying the actual graduates. Only do this if your sibling is happy about it because it is not your day.

I'm not going to bother responding anymore because you either can't understand what is being suggested to you or you simply don't want to.

If it was possible to get the photo done on my day in this country I would definitely have taken that option. They dont supply caps and gowns in this country. End off story. Yes of course I want my sibling to be here for my day...your right I dont understand your comment which you are making with regards to that.

If I come home next month that will be it. I tried to explain, I wont be back in Ireland in the fore-seeable future, I cannot afford the costs of taking 4 flights to get there and back to go home more often.

If and when I decide to fly home for it, I will contact the company directly that supplies the cap and gown and arrange with them to see where I can pick it up. If its a case that ive to pick it from their offices etc.

Yeah of course I agree, ill be happy to wait outside, like i said, the photo is really just a gift that would be nice for the parents to have.

Fine if you dont want to reply. I posted here, to get information from people who have been in similar situations and what they did etc. Someone mentioned that there are TV facilities, someone mentioned that you might be let in, someone mentioned its possible to contact the University and get tickets...

Look, there are loads of people graduating. That's why they're strict with the tickets. Do you not think everyone would like their granny/sister/brother/stepdad to attend? To be honest, I think getting a photo taken of you in a cap and gown at your sibling's graduation is plain weird. It's his/her day, not yours. If you didn't get all that for your own graduation, that's just too bad. If I were you, I'd just arrange it myself, another time. It seems that you only care about the photo, not seeing your sibling graduate.

Truley

When I made my graduation we were issued with two guest passes and given the option to apply for extra tickets if we wanted. On the day I had four family members as well as my boyfriend at the actual ceremony, and I saw alot of other people did too. There was loads of space in the hall on the day.

Otherwise I saw loads of friends and family members hanging around outside during the ceremony itself as that's where the food was served, the pictures were being taken etc. This was in UCD.

Shelga

I'm due to graduate next month, and tbh I don't see the day as that big a deal. Your decision to come home should be based on getting to spend time with your family, not on a photo?

I think you are making far too big a deal out of the photo thing; as someone else suggested, you can hire a cap and gown another time when the family will all be together, if it's that important to you.

I know you said your sibling is fine with it, but if one of my brothers showed up next month with their own cap and gown wanting joint photos at the venue, I would be absolutely mortified.