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Cannot see the light.

  • 07-10-2010 5:55pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I have fallen out of love with my husband.

    I had decided that this was fine and I could just go on this way and not rock the boat.

    Now I don't think I can pretend anymore. I have felt like this for about 3 years and its getting worse.

    I just cannot face the unheaval to him and my children and the sadness it will cause if I leave. My husband is not a bad person.

    I cry in the car most mornings and evenings. I feel crushed.


Comments

  • #2
    coolcat63
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 193 ✭✭coolcat63


    What do you mean by "fallen out of love with your husband"? Do you care for him and him for you? Can you give more details of why you are so unhappy?


  • #3
    LighterGuy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,243 ✭✭✭LighterGuy


    Well if you truly have fallen out of love with your husband. Then that is life sometimes sadly. You cant change how you feel... however you can stop alot of unnecessary pain.

    You say you have been feeling this way for 3 years. You have to talk to your husband. If you dont, not only will you be hurt more - you run the risk of just letting him and your family know when YOU are ready. Which will make you selfish and to be blunt... a b*tch.


  • #4
    Beruthiel
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,362 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    anonymousposter wrote: »
    I have felt like this for about 3 years and its getting worse.

    What have you done to rectify this?
    Have you gone to a professional?
    Before you do anything drastic, have you done all you can to save your marriage?


  • #5
    luciusesox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36 ✭luciusesox


    Beruthiel wrote: »
    What have you done to rectify this?
    Have you gone to a professional?
    Before you do anything drastic, have you done all you can to save your marriage?

    +1 to this.

    I would try counselling, and if it doesn't work out then you can separate with a clear conscience (that you tried) and also probably more understanding from your friends and family.


  • #6
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    My husband has noticed that something is up, but I don't really know where to start. I have never visited a professional counsellor because I havn't got that much faith in them to be honest. I just cant see how 'talking' about it can help.

    Thanks for your replies. They are much appreciated.


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  • #7
    neuro-praxis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,184 ✭✭✭neuro-praxis


    "I've tried nothing and I'm all out of ideas." <-- you

    I'm not undermining how miserable you feel. Time to start talking. Talk talk talk and don't stop until you've let your husband know everything that is going on with you, and then get yourselves some help to learn to listen to one another again and maybe in fall in love all over again. You could be amazed.

    Only give up when you have given it your all, 110%. Every relationship struggles over time. You need to learn how to make relationships work for you or this problem will repeat itself over and over again.


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