Glasgow Nicks

MonkieSocks

Some nicknames that have been given to Glasgow characters by their friends and workmates:


Two Soups - his real name is Campbell Baxter.


Norrie Two Bunnets - the Glasgow taxi-driver who wears a wig under his cloth cap.


The Colostomy - the girlfriend of a married man (I.e. The wee bag on the side).


The Boomerang Kid - whenever anyone at work asks a question, he always replies: 'I'll get back to you on that. '


The Parachute - lets everyone down at the last minute.


Cashline - an experienced young lass who's open 24 hours a day.


Vaseline - his real name is Willie Burns.


Rembrandt - loves saying to colleagues: 'Let me put you in the picture...'


Bo Derek - a chap called Derek with terrible body odour.


Brewer's Droop - his real name is Willie Falls ..


The Genie - magically appears whenever anyone opens a bottle.


Dulux - his pals reckon he's only got one coat.


Soapy - washes his hands of any problems that crop up..


Captain Hook - continually late for work, it's believed he must be scared of the alarm clock.


The Yeti - always on the sick, there have been many unconfirmed sightings of this guy, but nobody can prove he actually exists.


The Gas Man - he's serviced loads of old boilers.


The Hostage - when anyone asks for help he always replies: 'Sorry, my hands are tied.’



The Chernobyl Jannie - during the mid-Eighties this guy had a really bad complexion.


The Woodpecker - he's always tapping.


Mussolini - a woman in an office in Glasgow who has rather loose morals (aka the great dicktaker).

Bearhunter

Knew a guy in Glasgow once who was known as the locksmith - every time it was his round he made a bolt for the door.

Pal

I asked a Glaswegian one day what a Weegie Mink was.

Said I knew Weegie meant Glaswegian but what was a Mink ?

"That's a Minky Bassa" came the reply