Age gap...should it be an issue?

LegacyUser

ok, quick question.....28 male here. was in a long term relationship until 2 years ago when it ended. took me a while to get over it and wasn't really interested in meeting anyone. started back dating people about 8/9 months ago. Since then, i have been on a fair few dates, some good, some not so good...the usual stuff.

anyway, met someone recently and have been on a couple of dates that have gone very well, the girl seems very nice. not that it is really an issue but she is older than me, she is 32, nearly 33. just wondering have others been in a position where they have dated someone older/younger than themselves and how did they find it? after the initial honeymoon period was over, did it bring any complications or issues? do girls have any opinions on dating younger men, do guys have any opinions on dating older women?

suppose for me personally, the dates have gone well so might as well continue as i am enjoying them...just dont wanna hurt her or get involved too much if it may be an issue further down the line. or am i just thinking too much about the whole thing? thoughts......

shoes34

Hi, when I was 34 I dated a guy who was 27 and the age gap was never an issue for us, and no one every made any comments on the fact that I was older, and everyone knew as we are from the same town, we did laugh at times at how when he was starting secondary school I had left.

Just take each day as it comes and don't think too much about the age difference cause really it is only a number.

Beruthiel

I met my OH when he was 26. He's 8 years younger than me. We're getting married shortly.
Age has nothing to do with it.
More, it's where both your heads are at. If you want the same things from life and are on the same page, then happy days.

She is at an age where she is well able to tell you what she wants or expects from you and life. So relax and enjoy yourself.

Ickle Magoo

I think age gaps become less of an issue the older you get and 28 & 33 is barely a gap at all! Age gaps tend to be more of an issue in terms of maturity or of where you are in life - late 20's/early 30's is the same group as far as I'm concerned. Just enjoy! :cool:

Overheal

28 and 33 is not an age gap. You mad?

Cheap Thrills!

Hey, in your 20's 5 years might seem a big age gap. But an age gap like that is not really too much of a big one.

My oh and I have an age gap of more than double that and it's not an issue between us.

I wouldn't worry about it !

whatsamsn

Ickle said it best
Theres nothing wrong with age gaps its about maturirty

Think of it this way. A 19yo is dating a 34yo. 15 year age gap. What would they have in common? From the smallest to the biggest details. Even on maturity levels.

But what if a 30yo dated a 45yo. Still the same 15 year age gap. But they'd have more in common.

Whynotme

The only marraiges in my family that have lasted the pace are where the woman is older! Don't let it hold you back. If she is for you then it will work out.

ToxicPaddy

The whole age gap thing is only an issue when you're younger, like a 20 year old seeing a 15 year old.. then its an issue..

You're in your late 20s she is in her early thirties, by right you should be both mature consenting adults and if so then age is just a number.. I wouldn't get hung up on it at all. If you're happy and she is happy, then forget about it and get on with life.

Its hard enough to meet someone you like, get along with and are genuinely happy with, without trying to complicate things in your own head by thinking the age of someone is an issue. Its not.

Go forth and enjoy life..

dollydishmop

whatsamsn wrote: »

Ickle said it best
Think of it this way. A 19yo is dating a 34yo. 15 year age gap. What would they have in common? From the smallest to the biggest details. Even on maturity levels.

Perhaps I'm the exception to the rule there...

When I was 19 my partner was 38 yrs old (boyfriend sounds a bit twee for a fella that age - ha ha!)

We were together nearly 2 years in the end, and we had loads in common. We were both huge car enthusiasts, and would spend most weekend either working on our cars or going to car shows, camping out with friends and both active with local enthusiasts club etc. We shared an appreciation of good old fashioned real ale, so always on the look out for a nice pub serving something curious from a barrel. We loved all the same music, and would hit the local gigs scene on a regular basis. We loved travelling & european history, and would head to France etc as often as we could to visit the old WWI & WWII sites, both on our own or with a group of friends.
My parent's knew him vaguely before we got together (we were working together - that's how we got together). And when they got to know him better they loved him too.
We always used to joke that he was old enough to be my father, and yet my father was old enough to have been his.
there was no acrimonious break-up....I got more and more into the field of work we were doing so I decided to go back to college to gain qualifications in the industry, and I guess our relationship had run its course and we drifted apart.

But when we were together we never failed to find fun stuff to do in our spare time, or things to talk about, laugh about, or discuss at length, and never once did he make me feel like I was the 'trophy teenage girlfriend'.

We stayed firm friends even after we ended our relationship as a couple, up until he sadly died about 8 years ago. He was a really lovely man, and I only have fond memories of the time we spent together.

Ah sure, I don't have to justify how much we had in common, outside of the bedroom, to anyone really...but did feel I wanted to defend our age gap and show that it is possible....without the 'creepy' connotations often unfairly attributed to large-age-gap relationships, featuring younger women.

batista

It totally depends on where you guys are in your lifes. Im 26 but am nearly always in relationships with older women, mainly because younger women do nothing for me, who likes spending evenings talking about jedward But you cant be nieve enough to think that it wont pose any problems for you. Firstly dont worry at all what other people think, most people have enough crap going on in their own lives not to really care about whether you are with an older woman or not.

I went out with a 32 year old when i was 24 all my mates thought i was mad but we got on like a house on fire, zero problems at all but the relationship didnt last past 6 months as she had to leave Ireland for work. Last year i started going out with a 28 now 29 year old, we broke up recently. Much more acceptable in terms of an age gap being less than 3 years but the difference in the end between her and my previous girlfriend were massive. In reality it was as if she was older than her as she wanted kids etc soon. So in the end my man all i can say is going out with older women is brilliant, every case is different so dont worry about the exact age gap i.e. 2 years or 5 years doesnt really matter. What matters and here is the key point is not age differences but like all other relationships where you are at in life and what you want from it

SuperTyper

I'm 39 and my BF is 25:eek: We get on great, have loads in common and its possibly the most easy going and stress free relationship I have ever been in. He is the best:D