Over reacting Girlfriend

LegacyUser

Hi guys, I'm regular poster, just going unreg for this as I am looking for advice regarding my relationship. My girlfriend is a beautiful, wonderful person and I love her very much. However there is one issue that keeps coming up in our relationship and I am not sure how to address it.

We see each other almost everyday, sometimes we go and have food or do something together. Some other evenings we stay in and watch a movie etc. However sometimes it is not always possible for us to meet up. If I have something to do, for example sometimes I will have a friend who would like to catch up with me, or have some work that I do outside of my normal working hours to catch up on etc. Or ocassionally I am feeling too tired to hang out and just want to go home to chill out. I think basically what I am trying to say, without sounding like an ass*ole is that I am finding her very needy and I am not sure how to address this and get her to cut me some slack. I feel like I am the one who does all the running around and pushing things aside in my life, and all I get is grief if one time in the week I can't meet her or see her.

Has anyone got any advice or been through similar or am I just plain unreasonable?

Ickle Magoo

I think honesty is usually the best policy in these situations. Make sure you can get some privacy and have a chat about how unhappy this is making you and put your cards on the table. You are entitled to a life out-with your relationship and getting grief for not constantly doing all the running must be exhausting. You have to let her know that and you have to let her know that ultimately it could become a deal breaker and have a discussion about how to move on with that in mind.

Best of luck

IrishEyes19

lookingforadvice22 wrote: »

Hi guys, I'm regular poster, just going unreg for this as I am looking for advice regarding my relationship. My girlfriend is a beautiful, wonderful person and I love her very much. However there is one issue that keeps coming up in our relationship and I am not sure how to address it.

We see each other almost everyday, sometimes we go and have food or do something together. Some other evenings we stay in and watch a movie etc. However sometimes it is not always possible for us to meet up. If I have something to do, for example sometimes I will have a friend who would like to catch up with me, or have some work that I do outside of my normal working hours to catch up on etc. Or ocassionally I am feeling too tired to hang out and just want to go home to chill out. I think basically what I am trying to say, without sounding like an ass*ole is that I am finding her very needy and I am not sure how to address this and get her to cut me some slack. I feel like I am the one who does all the running around and pushing things aside in my life, and all I get is grief if one time in the week I can't meet her or see her.

Has anyone got any advice or been through similar or am I just plain unreasonable?

First of all, I think it's really nice how decent you are about this, I've often seen guys to go really loopy over gf's being needy and clingy and they berate and basically talk terribly about their other half, so it's really nice that you've spoke very nicely about her.

I agree with the above poster, you need to talk to her about this, but in a way that states you're not thinking of breaking up with her, as this type of talk can plant doubts in girls minds. Maybe speak also in a way that says maybe she needs space too, as in suggesting that theres no need to feel compelled to see each other everyday that, having that strain on the relationship means theres no comfort in knowing the other is alright for 5 mins alone.

what you need to do in my opinion is, make it about her, as if you feel its upsetting her, that way you arent accusing her of anything and she wont see a need to get dramatic or angry. She might even be relieved to think you were thinking of her feelings.