Father to be

denashpot

Hi,

My fiancee should be giving birth in the next 6 weeks and im clueless of what to bring her up after the birth.

As in, is it the norm to get her flowers? Card? Balloons?

Im useless at these things and I'd hate to disappoint her.

Thanks.

CK2010

its really sweet that you're thinking about doing something nice for her.

will you be at the birth?

my partner was there for the birth and then left after a while "for a coffee with his dad" (i was a little annoyed at him for this because he hates coffee and i wanted sleep! ) and when he came back he had a little locket so i could put a pic of our new baby in it. it was really sweet, he had asked his dad to help him pick something.

so maybe something along those lines, not even something expensive just thoughtful. but perhaps get it before the birth so that you dont have to rush out to buy it, you'll have it to hand.

personally i wouldnt bother with balloons or flowers, generally you'll get enough from family and friends.

she'll be really happy with her baby so she wont necessarily expect a gift or anything but its a nice gesture to show you appreciate what shes been through etc.

Moonbeam

Aww, that is so sweet:)
A teddy for the new baby and spend as much time with her in the hospital helping as you can.
It is tiring dealing with a new baby and visitors and would rpobably be lovely for her if you took him off for his nappy changes or came in and looked after him to give her a chance to shower in peace:)

bulmersgal

Yea I think the things I liked the most was when somebody made me sandwhich and tea as I kept forgetting to eat. Also little things like washing bottles etc just made it easier for me to bond with baby and not have to worry about anything else.

A locket is a lovely idea though

crazy cat lady

I got snowed into the hospital and my husband couldn't make it up from Wicklow so he had flowers, a balloon and a teddy delivered to me in the hospital. I really wasn't expecting anything, he'd already given me the best thing in the world!

I really appreciated him just being really hands on with everything after the birth. I was breast feeding so he did alot of other things around the home and alot of nappy changes etc... Pity he's not so enthusiastic about nappy changes now!

The locket is a lovely idea. A 'Baby's First Year' book would also be another lovely gift. You could give it to her with some of the 'Day I Was Born' details filled in etc..

CK2010

yeh i forgot to mention that being hands on is the greatest gift, like others have said! but the fact you were sweet enough to be asking about gifts etc. i assumed you were one of the good ones who does this regardless :P

denashpot

Thanks for the replies. A locket is a great idea.

Might look at getting the 'Baby's First Year' book as well.

I will need 2 as were having twins!

CK2010

wow two babies! best of luck!

ThePiedPiper

Denashpot,
Some of the more random things that I got for my wife first time were
1. Underwear
2. Nightdress, not one she was wearing when pregnant, a regular sized one
3. Dressing gown for when she was walking around the ward
4. Slippers
5. Crisps
6. Chocolate

There'll be plenty of other people buying flowers, teddys, etc so too much of that will clutter the small area up too much and you'll only be dragging them all out of the hospital with you.

But the best thing, as others have said, is to be there as much as you can. I think the first week of my child's birth, I was getting about 4 hours sleep a night but my wife really appreciated me being there as much as possible.

cch

The traditional answer to this question is an eternity ring.

Nevyn

While maybe traditional it only applies if they new parents are married.

A book or two or magazines.

Handcream and a good moisturised, Lush's dream cream is wonderful as the hospital will be very warm.
Bottles of water and smoothies.

I can understand wanting to get something which will last for ever to mark the occassion but there is so much going on in there and it may go missing, so maybe have something for here when she gets home.

Das Kitty

Best gift I was brought in hospital was a pair of earplugs and an hour's sleep. Felt so good.

caprilicious

Congrats on your imminent arrival denashpot!

This probably sounds weird, but I read on a similar thread before the nicest & most thoughtful present a woman got from her husband was a rubber ring for her piles after pregnancy
It mightn't have been one of the most romantic presents, but it was really thoughtful & gave her massive relief!

Twins, lucky you!

My dh didn't bring me a present, but when I got him he'd the house all lovely and tidy, nice fresh sheets on the bed & it was so lovely not having to worry about tidying the place when I got home!

Moonbeam

I bought him a watch from the child to mark the occasion:)I thought it was a lovely idea.

How Strange

Op, I'd imagine the best thing you could get/do is give your support. Make sure the house/apt is sparkling clean, the food shopping is done, a fire lighting if you have one for when she comes home.

As for hospital ear plugs and an eye mask might be good so she can sleep.

Take a picture of all 3, perhaps not straight after giving birth if she's not comfortable with it, and frame it.

Best of luck!

implausible

I'd agree that help and support are the best gift but a few weeks before I popped, we were out shopping and I spotted some jewellery I liked. A few days after I had the wee man, he handed me a gift-wrapped box with the chain and bracelet in it - I was delighted.

As for the eternity ring, do people still do that? A new baby is expensive and in our case, we'd only got married the year before and engaged the year before that so I had enough metal on my hands! The locket is a really sweet idea though.

How Strange

I certainly don't want an eternity ring when I have our little one. We only got married in Feb and are trying to save for baby things as well as pay off our wedding loan so buying an eternity ring would be a complete waste of much needed money imo.

A small gift certainly is a nice gesture but I don't expect or want one.

Ayla

I'd agree w/ those who say the time & courtesy are the best gifts to be given. It's the little things that'll make the biggest difference to a new mom...and remember she may be a bit more emotional than normal, so what may be alright normally may not be for the first couple weeks.

King Mallie

We had a baby 14 weeks and the best present is be at the hospitial to keep with baby and your partner will be wrecked and she will really appreciate your help.

But get a little teddy cos it is nice for your have their very first teddy bought by its dad.

Best of luck this is a very special time so enjoy every min of it.:rolleyes:

bulmersgal

I just remembered what my mam and dad did for me, which was so nice and unexpected. My babies room was just plain white like the rest of house and after I had my little girl they went to m&p's and got gorg pink border and curtains and bedclothes for cot. It was so nice to finally see pink as all my clothes for her were neutral

bp

The nicest thing I got was a baby book but would have loved if he had a teddy ready to go in the cot and if you can afford it a cleaner....have her come home to a clean house with a well stocked fridge.

Congratulations and lovely idea

dori_dormer

As far as I remember flowers weren't allowed in the coombe, somethign about allergies etc. maybe save them for when she's coming home? I'd skip balloons too as they just take up space! It was very tight in the semi private ward when I had my boy last year, but you may get a private room for twins(congrats btw!)

I'd stick with something small and sentimental like the locket or a bracelet with babies names engraved maybe?

And some thigh cute for the babies like a teddy

antodeco

Well my wife got an eternity ring 11 years after our first! Just didn't make sense at the time. After an engagement ring and a wedding ring, I thought an eternity ring would be best. Now she's due again in 7 weeks! Think I might take the eternity ring back off her and just hand it to her again :pac:

dekey

On our wedding day my husband got me a tiffany bracelet with our initials and date engraved on it. When our lo was born he got me a charm with baby's initial and dob on it to add to the wedding day bracelet which I love. However, he also did some really inexpensive things that I loved too. There was no food given in hospital after a ridiculously early time and being a breastfeeder I was constantly famished. When he came to visit in the evening he brought in a freshly made up roll and snack and a large hazelnut latte (my favourite!) I swear I never loved him more! When I came home from hospital there were fresh flowers in a vase, the papers from the day she was born as a keepsake and the very first picture that had been taken of her after she was born had been printed and framed and was already sitting on the mantlepiece. All these little gestures meant more to me than any elaborate piece of jewellery.

Lucuma

bring her neurofen plus!! so annoying hounding staff on the wards for paracetemol every 6 hours or whatever

BeardySi

Fresh bacon and cheese sandwiches were what my OH most appreciated after the baby.... She had a real issue with the hospital food - was bringing her up 3 meals a day!

magicmushroom

The locket is a lovely idea.
Or maybe a Pandora bracelet with a charm for each baby if she's into that kind of thing.

Have the house tidy for when she gets home, fresh sheets on the bed.

Nice new PJ's waiting for her, a few bits like bubble bath, moisturiser etc.
Make sure she has an hour to herself for a bath that evening.
As she will have very, very little time to herself from now on!